AITA for being frustrated that my roommate last minute said “uhm I don’t want anyone to drink to night” and then angrily went to his room?

The living room was set for a cozy movie night, fairy lights twinkling above a bowl of popcorn, the promise of laughter lingering in the air. But in one swift moment, the vibe soured like a forgotten lime wedge at the bottom of a cocktail glass. A Reddit user found themselves tangled in a prickly spat with their roommate, who dropped a last-minute bombshell: no alcohol allowed tonight. The frustration was palpable—after all, who expects a casual vodka cran to ignite such drama?

This clash wasn’t about wild partying; it was a simple plan for a few drinks and a flick. Yet the roommate’s abrupt objection, followed by a stormy exit to their room, left everyone reeling. The OP’s muttered comment may have fanned the flames, but it’s hard not to feel their exasperation. How do you balance personal comfort with shared space? Let’s dive into this sticky situation and see what unfolded.

‘AITA for being frustrated that my roommate last minute said “uhm I don’t want anyone to drink to night” and then angrily went to his room?’

So I have a roommate who doesn't like alcohol much, which is fine I'm not peer pressuring him to drink or whatever. What frustrated me though is that he pushes his discomfort for alcohol on everyone else. Yesterday, my other roommates and I planned that we would have vodka crans and watch a movie.

After I asked my other roommate (who would be drinking) if they would like one now, this one says

It's not like we were getting blackout drunk either, just a couple drinks and a movie. Originally, I was going to oblige, but I did say under my breath something like

He works at a bar and grill, so in terms of the smell and being around it all day, I don't know what he expected. Later, he come out to use the restroom and just said

Roommate squabbles over lifestyle choices can feel like navigating a minefield in fuzzy slippers. In this case, the OP’s frustration stems from a sudden shift in plans, clashing with their roommate’s discomfort around alcohol. Both sides have valid feelings, but the lack of clear communication turned a chill night into a heated standoff.

Dr. Irene S. Levine, a psychologist specializing in relationships, notes, “Living with others requires negotiation and mutual respect, especially when personal values differ” (source: Psychology Today). Here, the roommate’s objection might reflect deeper sensitivities—perhaps tied to their bar job—while the OP’s muttered jab shows irritation at feeling controlled. Neither communicated openly, leaving assumptions to fester.

This scenario mirrors broader issues in shared living. A 2021 study by Apartment List found 34% of roommates argue over lifestyle differences, like drinking or noise (source: Apartment List). The roommate’s work around alcohol could heighten their aversion, but imposing a last-minute rule risks alienating others.

To move forward, both could set ground rules. The OP might propose designated “chill nights” with drinks, giving the roommate a heads-up to opt out. Meanwhile, the roommate should express concerns earlier, avoiding dramatic exits. Open dialogue, maybe over coffee, could keep the peace.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit’s got a knack for dishing out opinions as spicy as a double-shot espresso. Here’s what the community had to say about this roommate ruckus:

Any_Dragonfruit4130 − NTA. Most adults who can handle their liquor don’t have a problem. You have absolutely have the right to drink in your home,even if he doesn’t like it. Tell the moody child to go to his room. If he continues to be a pain, I would start complaining about something he enjoys. Give him a taste of his own medicine.

TerrificVixen5693 − NTA. Drinking a couple of vodka spritzers and watching a movie is totally normal and you’re not responsible for anyone else’s comfort.

Runns_withScissors − ESH. You guys need to communicate better. You say

Bring this up at a time when nobody's drinking and you're both calm. Discuss it, and see if you can come to some sort of resolution. What's your roommate's real issue? Maybe you guys get drunker than you think you do? Maybe you're loud? I can understand why that a bartender would get tired of being around alcohol and people who were drinking, but all of you have a right to enjoy your space.

hamilhead − NTA. I don’t drink but I don’t force that on people near me. It’s not as if you were planning on getting blackout drunk - it was just a movie so fair enough. Your roommate needs to grow up

sapienBob − your mentioned you planned this with your roommates beforehand. was this roommate privy to the plans in advance or was this the first time they heard the plan? if they knew ahead of time, then NTA. they could have made arrangements instead of pudding the burden on y'all.

nothanks33333 − Esh, there's something else going on here and neither of you are communicating directly about it

hesherlobster27 − Nta. Not sure who he thinks he is that he gets to dictate what other adults do. Childish.

DangerLime113 − Eh- is it the smell or does everyone get loud and obnoxious drinking? Somehow, I don’t envision a group quietly sipping vodka crans and watching a movie.

Monarch5142 − NTA overall but say what you mean with your chest, don't mutter under your breath in the future. Your roommate however is being a childish brat. If he's so bothered by alcohol why does he work around it? He can't have it both ways either its a problem and he cant be around it or it's not. Your roommate has no right to dictate how you spend your leisure time and this behavior comes off to me controlling, creepy, and manipulative.

Mrs_Gracie2001 − Somebody’s not telling the whole story. If everyone is acting fine, it shouldn’t make any difference what’s to drink. I’m guessing some alcohol-fueled behavior is happening.

These takes range from fiery clapbacks to thoughtful nudges, but do they capture the full picture? Maybe there’s more brewing beneath the surface.

This tale of vodka crans and slammed doors reminds us how fast a cozy night can unravel when communication falters. The OP’s frustration feels raw, but so does the roommate’s need for space. Living together is like a group dance—step on toes, and someone’s bound to stumble. What would you do if you were caught in this roommate tug-of-war? Drop your thoughts below—let’s keep the convo flowing!

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