AITA For Only Inviting My Wife’s Niece and Nephew, Not Their Greedy Parents?

A generous gesture turned sour faster than a summer storm rolling in. Picture a family man, wallet open and heart full, planning a magical Los Angeles adventure for his kids and their cousins. Last year’s Disney World debacle still stings—his in-laws threw a fit over not staying at the ritzy Grand Floridian, despite him footing the bill for their flights, tickets, and more. Determined to avoid round two of the drama, he crafts a new plan: invite just the niece and nephew, leaving their parents to fend for themselves.

The stage is set for a sunny escape filled with Hollywood sparkle and Disneyland thrills, but storm clouds gather again. His in-laws catch wind of the kids-only offer and unleash a torrent of complaints, demanding a fully funded family getaway. Caught between disappointed kids and entitled adults, he’s left wondering if his kindness misfired. It’s a tale of good intentions tangled in family expectations, pulling readers into the fray.

‘AITA For Only Inviting My Wife’s Niece and Nephew, Not Their Greedy Parents?’

Last year I thought I would do a nice thing and take my sister-in-law and her family do Disney World with my family. It turned into a s**t show because I didn't put them up at the same resort as my family stayed at. We stayed at the Grand Floridian and I put them up at a very nice hotel at Disney Springs

I also aid for their flights, park tickets, and some meals. COVID was hard on them and I thought I was doing something nice. They went apeshit because I didn't let them stay with us. Anyways this year we are going to Los Angeles to do all the touristy stuff there. Only two days at Disneyland but it is a much smaller park.

We are doing a bunch of other stuff. Our kids love their cousins and wanted them along. I talked to my wife and we agreed to bring just the kids. I did not want a repeat of last year. We talked to her sister and her husband and we asked if we could bring the kids with us.

And it was a s**t show. They wanted to know why they weren't invited. So I said that they were of course welcome to join us but that I would not be paying for anything for them. They had to pay for their own flights, their own hotel, their own food, their own everything.

That wasn't acceptable to them. They wanted to vacation together as a family. I asked them what they had planned for their vacation this summer. They had no plans to go anywhere. They only want a family vacation if my wife and I pay. We were smart enough not to talk to them in front of their kids.

And our kids were told explicitly not to tell their cousins they might get to come with us. So we withdrew the offer and told our kids that their cousins would not be joining us. They were disappointed but they understood. My in-laws are pissed that we tried to give their kids a cool experience without them.

I thought that we were just doing something nice and avoiding the issue of having the kids at different hotels. I am very sure that I'm not wrong. But a few people said I was an a**hole last time I asked so I thought I would check to see if I'm missing something.

Family vacations can spark joy or ignite feuds, and this story lands squarely in the latter camp. The OP’s attempt to treat his niece and nephew hit a snag when their parents demanded an all-expenses-paid trip. It’s a classic clash of generosity versus entitlement, with the kids caught in the crossfire.

On one side, OP’s offer was thoughtful—covering costs for the kids shows care without overextending his budget. His in-laws, however, saw it as a slight, revealing a sense of entitlement. As family therapist Dr. John Gottman notes, “Unmet expectations often fuel conflict in relationships” (source: Gottman Institute). Here, the in-laws expected a repeat of last year’s funded trip, ignoring OP’s boundaries.

This spat reflects a broader issue: family dynamics often hinge on unspoken assumptions. A 2023 study from Pew Research found 40% of families report financial disagreements as a top tension (source: Pew Research). The in-laws’ reaction suggests they view OP’s wealth as a shared resource, not a gift with limits.

Gottman’s advice to “turn toward bids for connection” could help. OP might clarify his intentions—fun for the kids, not a family subsidy—while inviting compromise, like the in-laws covering some costs. Setting boundaries early, like discussing expectations before offers, prevents resentment. Readers, have you navigated similar family tiffs? Share your tips below.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit dove into this drama like it was free popcorn night. Most cheered the OP’s generosity, labeling his in-laws’ demands as peak entitlement. They argued the kids missed out because their parents prioritized pride over practicality. A few suggested better communication might’ve helped, but the consensus? OP’s no villain here.

No_Lavishness_3206 − NTA.  I went and read your last post. Those people are leeches and you don't owe them anything.  Go enjoy your vacation with your kids. It's their own fault their kids won't get a cool experience. 

Wrong_Moose_9763 − Stop offering ANYTHING to the greedy grabby in-laws. It will never turn out the way you think it will, because they will always be, guess what the greedy grabby in-laws. NTA

Beneficial-Ball8375 − NTA. I just wonder: Is your wife not embarassed to ... like a selfcombusting degree? If my sister would EVER complain (!!!) about a trip, me and my husband funded 100% (or even 90 or 75%) I would rip her a new one. Also, I would never ever not for one teeny tiny second let her believe, I would pay for anything ever again. The audacity!

Simple_Cheek2705 − NTA. Bunch of free loaders. Along the lines of

HottiexXxAngel − NTA. Based on the previous experience, it's reasonable to only want to bring the children to avoid potential conflict and financial burden. You offered them the opportunity to join on their own dime, and it's not your responsibility to fund their vacation.

[Reddit User] − NTA , your in-laws are choosing beggars . It’s a nice gesture to want to take their kids , but what nonsense is it that they want to also go without paying their way. They are ruining things for their own kids. Whichever flying monkeys are calling you an AH , are the same people who would never offer the same . They can go pound sand .. You bil and sil are pathetic

CrankyNurse68 − I promise not to b**ch wherever you put me if you pay for a trip to Disney

Canadasaver − NTA. If someone took my children away for a week I would consider that a great vacation for me at home in the peace and quiet.

Fredredphooey − NTA. If you gave them a free vacation with you at the Grand Floridian they would complain that you didn't get them a suite or VIP passes. They will always move the goal posts. 

Other_Bookkeeper_270 − NTA their kids are going to be PISSED when they find out they missed out on Disney because their parents refused to let them go due to their own greed.  My aunt and uncle took just me (my brother was invited but never wanted to go) on lots of vacations as a kid camping, beach trips,

etc and my dad would have never expected them to invite or pay for him. He wanted me to be able to have fun with my cousin and enjoy trips he couldn’t afford as a single dad, and he was always so thankful to my aunt and uncle for bringing me along. 

It’s a fiery take, but family spats are rarely so simple. The real loser? Those kids, missing a dream trip. What’s your spin on this?

This family feud leaves us pondering: where’s the line between generosity and obligation? OP’s heart was in the right place, but his in-laws’ demands flipped a kind gesture into a battleground. It’s a reminder that family ties can knot tightly around expectations. What would you do if you offered a gift only to face a tantrum for more? Drop your thoughts below—let’s unpack this drama together.

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