AITA for getting jeans that won’t fit my sister?

In a bustling mall, a 16-year-old girl twirled in front of a mirror, delighted by jeans that hugged her newly slimmed frame. After months of hard work and a surprising drop from size 30 to 24, she felt a spark of confidence—until she got home. Her older sister, usually the “skinnier” one, clutched those jeans with a scowl, her frustration palpable. What should’ve been a simple shopping trip spiraled into a clash of emotions, leaving the teen wondering if she’d stepped on a landmine.

This isn’t just about denim; it’s about navigating body changes and sibling bonds under pressure. Readers might feel the sting of the girl’s confusion or recall their own moments of family tension. As we dive into her Reddit tale, let’s unravel the emotions and perspectives swirling around this wardrobe war.

‘AITA for getting jeans that won’t fit my sister?’

My sister (24f) is really upset with me (16f). Recently I bought a few new pairs of jeans. My normal size use to be about a 30 but over the course of a few months I lost a lot of weight and my size dropped to about a 25 (or 24 depending on the brand).

My sister had always been the skinnier of the two of us so whenever she gained some weight she would borrow my jeans because she was “too fat” to fit into her normal pair (a 26), and my clothes were there only things that would fit her without her going out to buy new clothes. Yesterday I went to the mall with my friends and bought some new clothes because the majority of my wardrobe didn’t fit me anymore.

I bought a few tops, shoes, and three pairs of jeans. When I got home I put the clothes to wash and went to my room. After about an hour my sister walked into my room, visually upset, holding my jeans. I noticed she was carrying them and apologized to her because I assumed that they were done for a while so I was hogging the washing machine and perhaps she wanted to put her load of clothes to wash.

When I went to grab them from her she stepped away not letting me take them. I asked her what’s wrong and she asked who’s jeans were these for. I told her they were for me and took them from her arms so that I can put them to dry. She replied by saying they’re way too small. I answered by saying that they fit me very well and I already tried them on at the store to make sure.

She scoffed and said “well they won’t fit me”. I blinked and replied with “sorry I guess you’ll have to wear yours”. She seemed even more upset and told me about how she gained weight and can only fit into my size. I listened and shook my head replying that i’m not her size anymore. She left in a huff and i just watched. I’m a bit confused and i’m wondering if I had said something wrong?

A few hours later she texted me that I shouldn’t get use to my body right now because it was just puberty helping me and that I will gain all the weight back quickly. I don’t know how to reply and I’m honestly a little concerned that maybe I was too insensitive about the situation. So AITA?

Update: Thank you guys so much for your comments and suggestions. I’m reading everyone’s responses and believe I didn’t say anything wrong. I do feel bad because maybe my words were just triggering for her. I haven’t thrown out any of my old clothes because I was planning to sort through them to see what I can keep and what I can donate. I’ll take some clothes out for her and see if she wants them.

I’ll update if anything. The last message she sent me was a little questionable saying “you’re going to get pregnant”. Completely lost on that comment but I’m assuming maybe that was for someone else? I’ll give her the clothes tomorrow because I know she has some stuff to do the rest of the week and needs something to wear. I really love my sister and hope she forgives me for anything I did to make her feel bad.

Update 2: Offering my old jeans to my sister was a bad idea. I brought a basket of my old clothes to her room and asked if she wanted to pick some stuff out. She seemed offended by the idea and said I was being rude and that she didn’t need hand downs. I took back the basket and she kicked me out her room.

I talked to my dad about what happened (our mom isn’t in the picture) and he said to just leave her alone, so i’ll just be giving her space. Honestly I have no clue what else i could’ve done. Also i’m sorry if I had offended anyone with my post, it truly wasn’t my intention. A lot of people have messaged me that I was being a bit bratty for talking about what I was able to buy.

I truly was just providing information and I know that I am very fortunate to be able to afford new clothing and not be stuck with old ones. I also understand that perhaps I come off as very naive or stupid. I’ve seen a lot of people ask similar questions on this subreddit and I wanted advice or any indication that I spoke out of line. I’m getting a lot of threats on here so I thought I’d apologize to anyone I’ve triggered. Im truly sorry.

Sibling spats over clothes can feel like a rite of passage, but this one cuts deeper. The teen’s joy in her new jeans collided with her sister’s insecurity, revealing a tangle of body image and unspoken expectations. Let’s break it down.

The teen, dropping from size 30 to 24, is embracing a personal milestone. Her sister, at 24, faces her own weight gain and leans on borrowed clothes to avoid confronting it. The jeans—too small for her—shatter a fragile coping mechanism. The sister’s reaction, laced with biting comments, suggests envy and deflection, not entitlement to the teen’s wardrobe. This clash highlights opposing needs: the teen’s right to self-expression versus the sister’s struggle with self-worth.

Zooming out, body image affects many—about 80% of women report dissatisfaction with their bodies, per a 2019 study by the National Eating Disorders Association. Siblings often mirror each other’s insecurities, amplifying tensions. Here, the sister’s remarks, like predicting weight gain, echo societal pressures to conform rather than celebrate change.

Psychologist Dr. Susan Albers, in a 2021 Healthline article, notes, “Body image struggles often stem from comparison, especially within families where roles like ‘the thin one’ get assigned”. Applied here, the sister’s identity as “skinnier” crumbled, prompting her to lash out. Albers suggests reframing comparisons to foster empathy—key for both sisters.

For the teen, setting boundaries is vital. She can acknowledge her sister’s feelings without sacrificing her own progress. Offering old clothes was kind but misfired; instead, a calm chat about their feelings might bridge the gap. For the sister, reflecting on her triggers—perhaps with a counselor—could ease her reliance on external validation. Both could benefit from open dialogue, maybe over coffee, to rebuild their bond. Readers, have you navigated similar family dynamics? Share your thoughts below for a lively discussion.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s corner of the internet lit up with reactions to this jeans-fueled family drama, serving hot takes with a side of humor. The community rallied around the teen, calling out her sister’s behavior as less about denim and more about personal insecurities. From witty jabs to practical tips, their comments paint a colorful picture of support and shade. Here’s a roundup of what Redditors had to say.

Major_Barnacle_2212 − For someone with such great clothing and size advice to give out you’d think she’d just buy clothes in her own size. You did nothing wrong. She’s seems to be insecure about the change in your size. Unfortunately it’s an example of someone who can’t just be supportive of you without comparing it to themselves.. NTA.

SomeoneYouDontKnow70 − NTA. A 24 year old woman is capable of buying her own jeans. She shouldn't be depending on her little sister to provide her with them.

NoSalamander7749 − You're not being insensitive. Just give her the other jeans that don't fit you anymore if you want. Your sister is being rude and acting quite entitled. NTA, you've done nothing wrong by buying new jeans that fit.. This is unsolicited advice but make sure you don't put your jeans in the dryer :)

Lady_of_the_Seraphim − It sounds like your sister has been propping up her insecurity about her own weight gain with the mantra of well at least I'm still smaller than my sister

GothPenguin − She’s insecure and projecting because of her insecurity. It’s not you being insensitive. It’s all on her. NTA

Main_Freedom_Fluff − NTA. Not only can your sister buy her own jeans but couldn’t she also just wear your bigger old jeans that she used to borrow? Also I think your sister was a little out of line with some of her comments. Ps my body weight also fluctuates it’s just a thing that happens to some people so I like to keep my old jeans and then I have multiple sizes to choose from.

ParsimoniousSalad − NTA. Your sister is having difficulty adjusting to your weight loss, but her body issues have nothing to do with you or your clothes. You don't need to buy your clothing for her.

BrilliantSprinkles94 − NTA. Your sister has been an adult for years and can buy her own clothes. Her behavior is absurd.

HatsAndTopcoats − This is the dumbest rationale for

Strict_Research_1876 − just give her all of your old jeans that are to big for you now.

This tale of jeans and jabs reminds us how quickly personal triumphs can stir family friction. The teen’s excitement met her sister’s insecurity, leaving both grappling with hurt feelings. It’s a snapshot of growing pains—literal and emotional—that many can relate to. In the end, it’s about finding balance: celebrating yourself while staying kind. What would you do if your shopping sparked a sibling showdown? Drop your thoughts below and let’s keep the conversation going.

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