Wife started to hate me and our kids out of a sudden and now she left us.

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A suburban kitchen, once alive with warmth, turned cold as a 38-year-old father watched his wife transform into a stranger. Her icy refusal to comfort their injured daughter and bizarre claim that the ketchup was “hers alone” shattered their family’s harmony. Her hostility grew, targeting her children, her parents, and her husband, whose concern was met with forced smiles and cryptic detachment.

The tension boiled over when a heated outburst, marked by a thrown cup and a chilling demand for her “real family,” sent her fleeing into the night. This Reddit saga unfolds like a psychological puzzle, pulling readers into a family’s struggle with a loved one’s sudden unraveling. The husband’s anguish and the children’s confusion paint a vivid picture of a home adrift, inviting us to explore the fragile line between love and the mind’s unseen storms.

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‘Wife started to hate me and our kids out of a sudden and now she left us.’

Hi, this is my first time posting and im not an english native speaker. Im also sorry for my mess of a text but im just at the end mentally.. ​. My \[38M\] wife \[36F\] started to become increasingly hostile towards me, the kids and her own parents.

Our kids are 12, 9 and 4 yo. I first started to notice it around one week ago when our 12 yo tripped while playing and fell on her face. I ran to her to reassure she was ok but my wife didn't really...bother? She just sat on the bench and watched me and our daughter.

That evening i asked her why she showed no reaction and she shrugged it off and told me that 'I looked after her so its ok'. Thats not her normal behaviour at all and if that had happened a couple months ago she would have dropped everything and immediately look after our daughter.

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A day after that incident we ate dinner and the 9 yo asked her to pass him the Ketchup. She didn't pass it but responded with 'Why do you want to eat our Ketchup?'. That caught me off guard and I was extremely baffled. He asked if it isn't also 'his' Ketchup but she insisted that its hers and her families Ketchup.

I Thought she was making a joke but she looked extremely stern and sincere, so I gave him the ketchup. The rest of the day was uneventful but she kept looking at me and the kids in this... I really dont know... aggressive fassion. As if we were a threat to her.

During the last week I received only one kisse, not a single hug or any other kind of affection and even if she sometimes smiles at me, it just looks extremely forced. Sometimes she just looks at me as if she searches something.

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Obiously I asked her a couple times if something was wrong but she always denied it and said everything is fine. The problem is, if she was only hostile towards me i could somewhat in some way understand it.

Maybe I annoy her, maybe she doesn't love me anymore or she thinks im cheating or I dont f**king know. But she also seems to hate or at least be neutral towards the children. When they talk about school she doesnt care, when they have problems she doesnt care.

She doesn't tuck them in at night and i tell our kids that she's just in a bad mood and has a lot on her plate. But obiously they know as sure as I do that something isn't right. It really got out of hand when 2 days ago her mother called me, asking me if something is wrong with her daughter.

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Apparently she doesnt or at least only briefly answers her texts and doesn't want to meet her anymore. She told me that my wife told her that she 'isn't her real mother' which of course is something horrible to say and we both dont know why she said it or what exactly it meant.

When she asked my wife why she just said that she excused herself and said that it was a joke. She never or at least rarely had an argument with her mom. We all hat a great relation up to this week and i just cant in any possible way find out what changed.

It kept me up at night because my wife just feels like a different person. Now I thought about a mental illness, maybe some form of early altsheimers? But it doesn't seem to fit her behaviour. She had a depression when she was younger but thats 10 years ago.

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She was as lovely as one can be not even 2 weeks ago. There are a lot of other instances of her behaviour but i dont have the energy to write it down right now. That brings me to yesterday. I sat her down and asked her if something is wrong and I need an answer now or otherwise we will see a psychiatrist.

She started telling me that everything was fine and she just 'has to act as she always does'. That sentence made me feel sick to my stomach because I didn't know what it meant. Is she seeing someone? Is someone f**king holding her hostage or what is happening?

I asked her what she meant but she just brushed it off again, saying that she is ok. I then told her that we're seeing a psychologist and she started screaming at me that I can't make her. I insisted so she threw a cup at me, got up and told me that she wants her 'real family' back.

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I don't f**king know what that means. We didn't change anything. Everything is as it was a month ago. She grabbed her purse and ran out of the house. She returned a couple hours later and told me she is sorry for how she acted.

She did a complete 360 and said everything is good now she kissed me and told me she will explain it tomorrow but she is just tired now. When we got to bed later she kept looking at me as if I'm a stranger but I was also extremely exhausted from everything and just fell asleep. Its morning now and she left the house.

I can't find her and it looks like she packed some stuff of hers. Some jackets, her purse 2 pairs of shoes. I called her parents, her friends, everyone she knows but they all havent seen her.

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Her friends told me all that they haven't had contact with her in the last week. Should I call the police now? Have some of you experienced something similar? I just dont know what to do. I have never felt this helpless.. ​

EDIT: I called the police a couple minutes after the first people here told me to. The police responded and they took my story very seriously and said they will search for her immediately. I told them a couple places she might be.

I waited at home and distracted the children, saying that their mom took some time for herself. Her parents are at my house and play with the children, they are just as destroyed and unnerved as me.

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They have found my wife an hour ago at the local park, 5 hours after they started searching for her. It didn't look like she was fleeing or in a hurry but just waiting, sitting on a bench. They told me however that she was extremely hostile towards the police and punched an officer.

She is now in a psychiatric clinic but im not allowed to meet her nor anyone else. Doctors are caring for her and will call me as soon as they know more. Thanks for everyone that replied. Im extremely worried and im reading into all the mental illnesses you have posted. I just hope it is something they can cure quickly. I still feel like in a bad dream.

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

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This family’s ordeal shines a light on the mind’s fragile edges. The wife’s sudden hostility and eerie insistence that her family isn’t “real” point to a rare psychological condition, possibly Capgras delusion, where loved ones are perceived as impostors. Her rejection of her children, dismissal of her mother, and flight after an aggressive outburst signal a severe mental health crisis.

Dr. V.S. Ramachandran, a renowned neurologist, explains, “Capgras arises when the brain’s facial recognition system disconnects from emotional processing, making familiar faces feel alien.” The wife’s rapid shift, with no prior warning, suggests potential causes like psychosis, a brain tumor, or schizophrenia. Her aggression toward police underscores the need for urgent professional intervention.

Mental health stigma often delays treatment, with only 46% of affected adults seeking help each year, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness. The wife’s denial mirrors this barrier, making her husband’s decision to involve police a critical step to ensure her safety.

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For the husband, patience and education are essential. Dr. Ramachandran advises families to avoid confrontation and seek psychiatric evaluation quickly. Therapy, medication, or neurological tests may provide answers. Support groups can offer guidance, while protecting the children’s emotional well-being remains a priority. Swift action—contacting authorities or professionals—can prevent further harm.

Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit’s community responded with urgency and empathy, rallying behind the husband’s plight. Many pointed to Capgras delusion or psychosis as possible explanations, urging immediate police involvement to ensure the wife’s safety.

Others suggested medical causes like brain tumors or schizophrenia, stressing the importance of professional diagnosis. The collective sentiment emphasized swift action and compassion for a family in crisis.

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throwaway55555mmm − Psych nurse here- you need to look up capgras delusion. This is what it sounds like is happening. Call police now she may be in danger.

[Reddit User] − Homie this is way the f**k above our paygrade, this sounds like ya wife is having some really serious mental issues. Sounds like she goin through a really bad case of derealization.

possible she also schizophrenic, possible she got Capgras delusion, possibly early stages of dementia.. She needs help in the worst way or she gonna end up doing something really f**king bad.. edit: call the police f**king immediately. Like right now

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atypicala − Maybe call the police, report her as a missing persons? If you tell them she is suffering from a medical issue it might compel them to act more quickly. It seems unlikely to develop at that age but your wife could also be experiencing the beginning stages of a mental illness such as schizophrenia. I really hope everything works out for you.

ino_y − Did she hit her head recently?. is a cognitive disorder of face perception in which the ability to recognize familiar faces, including one's own face (self-recognition), is impaired.

Capgras delusion is a psychiatric disorder in which a person holds a delusion that a friend, spouse, parent, or other close family member (or pet) has been replaced by an identical impostor.

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Call the police and they can help you decide if she needs a professional to diagnose her. (She won't let you or her friends bring her in, she might think you're all robots or impostors right now).

refman1 − Call the Police,you need help, tell them you think she could be a danger to herself. Very sorry to read this, something is obviously terribly wrong. Call the Police.

catsncaffeine89 − I’m so sorry, this sounds terrifying. I would call the police right away, absolutely. They may make you wait a full 24 hours to file a missing persons report but you should get the ball rolling in whatever way you can immediately.

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In the mean time maybe check out any places she frequents regularly, and keep the line of communication open with her closest friends and family.. Definitely definitely seek out psychiatric help for her ASAP. I wish you the best, this sounds awful.

[Reddit User] − it seems as though your wife is developing a mental condition that effects her ability to recognize people. this problem makes relationships feel unreal and often begins to show itself as a feeling that the people you know have been replaced.

it is treatable through therapy and probably some drugs, I'm no expert, but results are going to be different for each person. look up the condition. send her the link or tell her about it. ask questions. its not that she needs to give you good answers but its important for her to be able to talk with you and share the burden.

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she is going to have big mood swings going from dwelling on how foreign you all are sometimes to how scared she is that she hurt the people she loves. back and forth. back and forth. all the while, without treatment she will get worse and ultimately end up running away, spending her money and becoming homeless.

[Reddit User] − Sounds very much like a psychosis.. Cops to find her, then involuntary psych hold for evaluation

Purpledoors3 − Sounds scary! I would call the police for her being missing asap. Then I'd take her to the doctor/psychiatrist asap. Maybe it's a brain tumor? I've seen other posts on here of sudden erratic behaviour that turned out to be that.

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Swish0327 − Your wife is having a mental breakdown or she could have a medical problem. She needs to see a doctor ASAP. The fact that this Happened over a relatively quick time period has me leaning towards medical... could be a tumor in her brain causing the change in personality...

This tale lays bare the raw vulnerability of love tested by a mental health storm. The father’s quick thinking likely saved his wife from greater harm, yet their path forward remains uncertain. It’s a stark reminder of the courage needed to face a loved one’s unraveling mind.

What would you do if someone close turned into a stranger overnight? Share your stories, advice, or insights below—your voice could light the way for others.

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