[UPDATE] Wife started to hate me and our kids out of a sudden and now she left us.

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A suburban home, once a haven of laughter, now echoes with the weight of absence. A 38-year-old father navigates a surreal nightmare as his wife, gripped by Capgras delusion, sees him and their three children as impostors. Her sudden hostility, from dismissing their daughter’s injury to fleeing after a violent outburst, has landed her in a psychiatric clinic, leaving the family to grapple with a diagnosis that feels like a plot twist from a psychological drama.

This Reddit update pulls readers deeper into a family’s resilience, painting a vivid portrait of love tested by the mind’s unseen fractures. The father’s weary hope and the children’s quiet strength invite us to explore the delicate balance of patience and pain in the face of a rare mental health crisis.

For those who want to read the previous part: Wife started to hate me and our kids out of a sudden and now she left us.

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‘[UPDATE] Wife started to hate me and our kids out of a sudden and now she left us.’

Thanks for everyone that gave me their advice. A lot of you have assumed schizophrenia or the rare Capgras delusion. Some of you assumed she was cheating which is something I won’t even address.

Thinking about it, Capgras really fitted the symptoms but I couldn’t just accept that, still hoping she was somehow f**king with us or that it was something mild and temporary and I just overreacted.

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After they took her in, i drove to the mental institute to give an exact explanation of what happened in the last week. The psychiatrist assumed some sort of schizophrenia. They told me they will look after her and I should go home to my children. I felt like i was drunk the entire time, I couldn’t close a single eye at night.

The psychiatrist called me yesterday evening and asked me to come to her office. I left my children with their grandparents and drove for what it felt like an eternity. She told me straight up that she strongly assumes that its Capgras.

She never saw a case of Capgras before but it fits everything she gathered. She explained to me how the past 2 days went down. My wife arrived there, being extremely hostile. She was put in a 'safe room' where she couldn't hurt herself.

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She calmed down after a couple of hours and the psychiatrist was able to talk to her. The good news was, that she quickly opened up and explained to her what she thinks. She 'knows' that her family and most of her friends have been swapped by clones.

She assumed that we, 'the clones', have sent police officers to get her and that she was scared of what we might do to her. She flew in the first place because she felt that we might attack her but mostly to get some space. She still isn’t sure if the 'clones' are malicious or not.

That explains why she was distrusting me and always searched for some signs in me and the kids. My wife said that we act exactly like the real ones and how perfect our disguise was, but she knew that we aren’t real because she didn’t feel any love towards me or the kids or her own parents.

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Writing this down feels like a lance piercing through my chest. She also told her how she was trying to hide her distrust of us, because she couldn't be sure if we know that she knows that we aren’t the real 'we'.

Her delusion that we’ve been swapped came to her 1 day before I noticed it. 10 days ago. She woke up, looked at me and knew that I wasn't the same anymore, not the real one. Same with the kids, her parents and her friends. She hadn’t had those thoughts before.

She asked the psychiatrist if she knows who swapped us or why it happened or if this happens often. She tried to avoid answering her question because she wasn’t sure how my wife would react if she gave in or took her out of her delusion.

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My wife asked her when she can get out again, the psychiatrist asked her if she wants to get out and she answered that she’s ok being here. It gives her some comfort being with professionals and she now has time to think. It helps that my wife is a nurse and that she respects doctors a lot.

The psychiatrist explained to me, how they will try to slowly deconstruct her delusion and that it can take a short or a very long time until she fully recovers. She explained to me that it’s possible that she might never truly recover.

But the fact that she opened up about it and doesn’t necessarily feel scared is a good sign. Im still not allowed to see her as it could make her panic. She apperas to be completely clear of mind about everything else.

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She knows names, dates, places, facts and everything she knew before. Only the thought that we aren’t the real ones is now a fact for her. Now I wait, till they have some good or bad news of how she develops.

Writing all of this down really helped me. I’m trying to wrap my head around this situation and im mostly scared for her and the children. I can’t hide how distressed I am and that my wife isn’t at home so I explained to them that she is in a mental hospital and she has to recover.

The 4yo doesn’t really understand but the other two took it surprisingly well. It helps that they heard all those m**bid stories my wife told them from the hospital i guess. They asked me when they can see her and i told them that i dont know, but i hope it will be soon.

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I havent felt this empty and i dont know if i should be sad or angry. f**k Thanks to everyone here that helped me. I feel like im in a waiting room at the dentist. Its so surreal. I feel better knowing what the problem is, but worse not knowing when it ends.

A family thrust into the chaos of Capgras delusion faces a rare and disorienting challenge. The wife’s belief that her loved ones are clones, coupled with her initial hostility and flight, underscores the severity of this psychiatric crisis. Her openness with doctors, however, offers a glimmer of hope in a story that feels like a psychological labyrinth.

Dr. V.S. Ramachandran, a renowned neurologist, explains, “Capgras results from a disconnect between visual recognition and emotional familiarity, making loved ones seem like strangers”. The wife’s sudden onset, as described, aligns with this, though her clarity on other matters suggests a focused delusion. Neuropsychologists note that 1-2% of psychiatric cases involve Capgras, often tied to schizophrenia or brain damage.

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The wife’s distrust, from scanning her family for “clues” to fearing their intentions, reflects the delusion’s grip. Yet her willingness to stay in care and respect for doctors is a positive sign. Dr. Ramachandran suggests gradual reintroduction, like phone calls, to rebuild familiarity without triggering panic. An MRI, as some Redditors advised, could rule out neurological causes like tumors.

For the husband, balancing hope and uncertainty is key. Support groups, like those offered by NAMI, can provide tools to cope, while therapy for the children ensures their emotional stability.

Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit’s community wrapped this family in a virtual embrace, their words a mix of raw empathy and practical wisdom. Personal recovery stories, like one user’s journey back to normalcy after a similar crisis, offered glimmers of hope, while others urged neurological tests to uncover potential brain issues, reflecting a collective push for answers.

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emiK04 − I felt like I was reading my husbands post. I went through something very similar back in March. Was hospitalized for 10 days. It is like living in a psychological thriller. My heart truly aches for you and your family. I know my husband had a lot of the same emotions you are having.

Since March I’ve returned to work, have been taking excellent care of myself and my children, I make sure I never miss my medication or an appointment with my psychiatrist. Life is good and back to normal. This is the first time I’ve shared any of my story, I just wanted to give you some hope. Much love to you all.

buttsaginton10 − OP stay strong. Take care of your kids and I hope that everything turns out okay in the end.

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[Reddit User] − Hey Op, I had to study Capgras Syndrome a little for an exam a couple of weeks ago. One thing that stood out to me: 'Hirstein & Ramachandran (1997) offer support:

**their patient claimed his parents were imposters when he spoke to them in person, but treated them as his real parents when he spoke to them on the telephone** – consistent with the delusion resulting from discrepant visual information (Young, 2000).'

If they will approve it, see if you can start gradually with phone calls. It stood out to me as the best avenue for initial treatment.. I wish you and your family all the best. **EDIT: I don't feel comfortable answering any more questions in op's thread. He's going through enough and should only listen to the doctors.**

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[Reddit User] − The fact that this can happen to a person, where your mind just suddenly completely turns on you possibly for ever feels like the true meaning of t**ror.

Dazza93 − OP can I highlight the one part she knew that we aren’t real because she didn’t feel any love towards me or the kids or her own parents. She feels no love towards your clone. However her way of finding the real you is through the love she feels for you. I know its a bitter pill, but understand that she absolutely loves the real you, she just cant tell if you're you.. Edit: thank you kind stranger for the silver.

plcanonica − Psychologist here. Capgras can often happen because of localised brain damage. It damages the 'emotional recognition' part of the process that recognises familiar faces. So people see a face, recognise its identity, but there is no feeling of familiarity. You should insist that they do a CAT or MRI scan of her brain and look for signs of recent mini-strokes or other localised brain damage.

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[Reddit User] − For the record, this is an excellent outcome. Your wife has had a major mental break and you did the right thing. It sounds like she is in a good place getting the care she needs. Whilst it is hard, this isn't your fault and you've done the best you can.

Don't worry about the time frame, it will take as long as it needs to take. In the meantime, you have your children to focus on. Be the best parent for them and whatever happens with your wife will happen. Its outside of your control and worrying about it will just drive your own mental health to a place where you have to join her.

[Reddit User] − Dunno what else to say, but just know there are people out there that care, and I hope she can recover, my heart breaks for you, good luck to you and your family.

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[Reddit User] − Wow, I'm so sorry you're going through this, but hopefully with such a quick diagnosis they can help her. Hopefully it helps the kids to know she wasn't just rejecting them, that she's ill. Best of luck to all of you.

RaynaOrShine − Neuropsychologist here. Very rare for this to have such sudden onset if it's psychiatric, and I strongly encourage a neurological evaluation or at least an MRI. Could be brain damage or tumor leasing to capgras syndrome.

These Reddit opinions pulse with care and insight, but do they fully capture this complex journey? This update reveals the stark reality of living with Capgras delusion, where love battles a mind convinced of betrayal.

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The father’s resolve and the children’s bravery shine through, yet the road to recovery remains uncertain. It’s a poignant reminder of the strength needed to hold a family together when the mind frays. Have you faced a mental health crisis in your circle? What helped you through? Share your stories below—your words could guide someone in the dark.

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