[UPDATE] My (M28) engagement with my partner (F27) is ruined because of a ring.

In a quaint Korean village, where cherry blossoms framed a heartfelt proposal, a 28-year-old man’s dream of marriage teetered on the edge. His custom-made ring, a ruby and diamond token of love, was meant to seal a future with his fiancée. But accusations of it being “fake” from her parents ignited a firestorm, pitting families against each other. Now, lab tests confirm the ring’s authenticity, yet trust remains shattered, leaving the couple at a crossroads.

This Reddit update, rich with cultural and emotional stakes, draws readers into a saga of loyalty and doubt.  As tensions simmer, the story probes whether love can survive when families clash over a symbol of commitment.

For those who want to read the previous part: Original Story.

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‘[UPDATE] My (M28) engagement with my partner (F27) is ruined because of a ring.’

Where my fiancé's parents are upset and accused my parents of intentionally giving a 'fake' engagement ring. Tested it in the lab, and it's a natural ruby from burma. They can guarantee the result, and can offer insurance letter. They said there is a natural crack in the ruby and natural inclusion(?). probably a jewelery expert can shed some light into what these mean.

Unfortunately, because the ring is now 'genuine', my parents are more upset about the accusation. On the other hand, my fiancé's parents dont really trust the result. This is a major trust issue.. We decided to let things settle before we discuss our intention of staying together and get married.. Question:. Any suggestion on how to approach this situation?

A ring, meant to symbolize unity, has instead exposed fault lines in this engagement. The fiancée’s parents’ refusal to accept lab-verified evidence suggests a deeper agenda—perhaps disapproval of the match—while the man’s parents’ hurt reflects wounded pride. Caught in the middle, the couple faces a trust crisis amplified by cultural expectations of family harmony.

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The fiancée’s hesitation to fully embrace the lab results may stem from loyalty to her parents or embarrassment over their accusations. His transparency, backed by receipts and tests, shows commitment, but her doubts signal a need for alignment. A 2023 study in Family Relations found that 68% of interracial or cross-cultural couples face parental disapproval, often escalating trust issues (source).

Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist, notes, “Secure bonds require mutual vulnerability and trust, especially under external pressure” . Johnson’s insight underscores the need for the couple to unite against external doubts. The man’s efforts to validate the ring are a start, but both must prioritize their bond over family pressures.

To move forward, they should seek couples counseling to rebuild trust and set boundaries with both families. A joint visit to a neutral jeweler could clarify lingering doubts. Open dialogue, perhaps mediated, could mend familial ties.

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Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s chorus of voices dishes out sharp insights and blunt advice, slicing through the drama with their take on this ring-fueled feud.

HilMickaelson − Thank you for your update. You've handled the situation well, but if your fiancée still doesn't trust you even after you've shown her proof, it might be worth considering ending the relationship. It's possible that she's being influenced by her parents or trying to use the situation to break up with you by painting you as the bad guy.

You need to sit down with her and have a serious conversation. Clearly explain to her that you won't buy her a new ring, and if she can't trust you after you've provided proof that the ring is genuine, then you see no point in continuing the relationship.

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She and her family should have apologized to you and she should have defended you to her family. If she's not able to admit her mistakes, she may not be a good partner for you in the future. Your relationship with your future in-laws seems damaged beyond repair, and they might have concocted this story to convince your fiancée to break up with you.

[Reddit User] − Thank you for the update.. Well done, you did everything right. And now you know: it's not about the ring. It probably never was. Her family will be impossible to please because they have just *decided* they don't like you. They will now look for another 'reason' to hate you.. So it comes down to just you and your fiancée (as it always should have done). What does she think? Does she understand how you are the victim here?

Does she understand how her parents are actively trying to sabotage your relationship with her? Is she prepared to be independent from them, to ignore their 'advice, to defy them, to take your side, to marry you? Is she on your side? I think allowing her a couple of weeks before having that discussion is a good idea of she is living with you, but a bad idea if she is living with her parents. Because her parents are pouring poison into her ears about you.

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sanguinepsychologist − If your fiancée “doesn’t care about the result anymore” because she’s *still* convinced the other place was right .. sorry to say that you’re looking into a pretty miserable future. She won’t change. She will always “be right” in her mind, and no amount of proof will convince her otherwise. That’s a very stupid trait to marry and have children with.

ididnotsee1 − Natural inclusions are natural imperfections inside the stone , that look like bubbles but it should not interfere with how the stone looks

over-it2989 − So basically regardless of hardcore proof she will never ever, ever believe you over her parents or put you and your relationship first.. What a miserable future you potentially have in store. I’m sorry, you clearly tried your best and unfortunately it’s not good enough for the person you wish it was good enough for but mate, you’ll have dodged a big time bullet if you end it now.

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shame-the-devil − I’m going to go ahead and call this that the gf does realize it’s a real ring, but is dissatisfied with it, and with the value of it, even at the $1500 that OP actually paid. However, this has blown up so much that even if OP were willing to buy a more expensive ring,

it would not mend the total breach of the two families caused by the impropriety and accusations of the gf’s family. This relationship is over. Apologize to your parents for the insult. They are likely very hurt that their son is not more insulted on their behalf.

No_Fee_161 − I know suggesting a break up is the stereotypical Reddit advice, but I'm just gonna say it here. If she still doesn't completely trust you and defend you to her parents, then it's about time for you to end the relationship. You deserve better than this, OP. I'm with your parents. I'm upset with the accusation and the fact that her parents still haven't apologized and still questioning the results.. She's not worth it, man.

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Ukcheatingwife − I don’t know how Asian people deal with this level of parental involvement in their relationships. You sound like a sweet and naturally caring guy who tried to do right and has handled everything properly. This level of intrusion and materialism plus distrust would have me back-pedalling all the way out of this relationship.

AngelOfLastResort − Hang on how did 4 different jewellery shops say that the ring is fake but a lab test proves it isn't? Could your fiancé have lied about the 4 different shops? Did she go to them herself or did her mother go alone with the ring? Something isn't adding up. Find out if she went with her mother to these shops.

If she didn't, then perhaps you're being set up. It's possible your mother in law concocted this lie to get rid of you. Suggestion: discuss the above with your gf. If she wasn't there, go to a jewellery shop together and ask their opinion. That might convince her she has been lied to by her mother. If your gf was in 4 different shops and all of them said it was fake, I'd ask who did the lab testing? Did you do it or your parents?

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wpnsc − Please don't marry her. This relationship has disaster written all over it. Best wishes to you op.

These perspectives fuel the debate, but can they guide a couple through such tangled family ties? Reddit’s raw honesty keeps it real.

This engagement’s unraveling proves that even a genuine ring can’t guarantee harmony when trust falters. As lab results clash with stubborn doubts, the couple’s love hangs in the balance, strained by warring families. Their story challenges us to weigh loyalty to partner against family ties. How would you bridge a divide when parents question your commitment? Share your thoughts, experiences, or advice—let’s spark the conversation!

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