This Woman Refuses to Get Married Until Her Single Best Friend Finds a Husband First

We all know that moment when a partner shares a deeply held dream for the future, only for it to come with a baffling catch. For one 28-year-old man, a casual discussion about marriage and starting a family transformed into a bizarre hostage situation involving his girlfriend’s single best friend.

The original poster’s dream is straightforward: he wants to start a family while he still has the energy to chase his future kids around the backyard. While his girlfriend agreed in theory, she introduced a non-negotiable condition: they could only marry if her best friend wedded at the same time. The catch?

The friend is chronically single, struggles with commitment, and has zero desire to walk down the aisle. Refusing to let their shared future hinge on a romantic miracle, he issued a strict two-year timeline. This rational boundary, however, only pushed their relationship to the breaking point. Curious how it all unfolded? The full story is right below.

This Woman Refuses to Get Married Until Her Single Best Friend Finds a Husband First

AITAH for telling my girlfriend her best friend has 2 years to find someone or we're moving ahead without that condition?

Starting a family early is a beautiful and common dream for many young couples, but aligning those complex timelines successfully requires both partners to be on the exact same page before making major life commitments.

So, my girlfriend (28F) and I (28M) have been together for three years now, and I recently brought up the marriage and kids talk. My reason is pretty simple: I...

If we have kids at 30, I'll be 48 when they turn 18, which still feels young enough to actually be involved and active in their lives. So, I wanted...

Not the same event, necessarily, just during the same season or timeframe. Honestly, I found it cute at first.

It is one thing to share a sweet childhood dream with your best friend, but attempting to actively micro-manage another adult’s entire romantic destiny is a surefire recipe for relationship disaster.

Here's where it gets complicated. I actually know her best friend personally, and she is genuinely terrible at relationships. She has never lasted more than six months with anyone and...

So, my girlfriend's whole plan is to first convince her that she wants marriage, then find her a guy, then hope that guy proposes, and then coordinate the weddings. I...

" "If things fall into place, great, but I can't wait forever with no end in sight. " That got her even more riled up. Am I the asshole for...

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Updates

EDIT: So, after reading through all the comments, I decided to reach out to her best friend and told her everything. And honestly, her friend found the whole thing just...

But hey, at least her friend and I are on the same page. I will update if anything changes.

Community Opinions

Reddit was utterly flabbergasted by the girlfriend's demand, with a near-unanimous consensus that the original poster was not only in the right, but perhaps too generous with his timeline.

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u/Plastic-Cabinet67
Ok.
The girlfriend thing should tell you exactly where you srand in this relationship.
Girlfriend come first.
Think about it.

u/stallion8426 NTA but think long and hard about getting hitched to someone who puts their whole life on hold because of a third party AND one that doesn't even want...

u/DrTeethPhD
YTA for not running screaming from this nightmare.
Your life is going to be tied to your gf's gf forever.

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u/Particular_Agent171 NTA But I do have some uncomfortable questions for you. 1. Is there any chance she doesn't want to marry you at all and has imposed this ridiculous condition...

u/jrm1102
Tbh she’s ridiculous for basing her life around this and youre ridiculous, less tho, for even giving it any credibility.

u/BisforBeard
Oh HELL NO! Her even asking you to do this is crazy and the fact that she doesn't see how crazy it is... is a huge red flag.
RUN!

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u/Individual-Paint7897 NTA. Your gf sounds like she has the emotional maturity of a 15 year old. I would re-think this going forward. Is she also wanting to be pregnant as...

u/DeJoCa I’d be re thinking getting married to her. You should be #1 priority at this point for sure, and in the future. She’s letting her friend have the priority...

u/Doctor_Boombastic
NTA Based on what you posted, do you think she's using this as a means to postpone moving forward? I just don't get her line of reason.

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u/bopperbopper “ so I was thinking about our future the other day… in the past, you said you wanted to get married around the same time your friend does. So...

u/Away-Zombie-767 2 years is too long. Imagine that in a year and a half she 'finds someone', she's not gonna get married in six months. So you'll have to wait...

u/grrrrowlhissss NTA that is very immature “magical thinking” territory that your girlfriend is living in. She is WAY too dependent on her friendship if she can’t have her own thing...

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u/BeautifulChaosEnergy
Yah I think she’s tell ing you she doesn’t want to marry you, with out telling you she doesn’t want to marry you…

u/Affectionate-Food266 You're going to have to state your case and set a hard boundary. Or let it go. Having a grown ass woman plan her life around other people than...

u/CoolRide7896 This is ridiculous. Is she then going to plan babies, buying a house, career advancement, whatever- around her friend? If she doesn’t realize how absurd this is you have...

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While almost everyone agreed the condition was absurd, a few commentators urged the original poster to dig deeper into whether this was a deliberate stalling tactic.

Navigating the transition from young adulthood to marriage often reveals hidden differences in emotional maturity. While it is natural to want to share life’s biggest moments with a best friend, expecting a partner to pause their own family plans for an indefinite period crosses a major line.

This situation forces both partners to evaluate what truly comes first: their mutual future or external social dynamics. Do you think the girlfriend is using her friend as an excuse to avoid commitment, or is she simply trapped in an unrealistic childhood fantasy? And how would you handle a partner who insisted on putting your shared future on hold for someone else? Share your hot take in the comments below!

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