My husband (35M) keeps calling me (32F) names. How do I get him to stop?

In a quiet home, where a newborn’s cries pierce the night, a 32-year-old new mom navigates a storm. Her husband, reeling from his father’s death, lashes out, hurling names like “bitch” and “imbecile” when she speaks up. Exhausted from solo parenting and healing postpartum, she’s no one’s punching bag, yet his apologies feel hollow, brushed off with hugs.

This isn’t just about harsh words—it’s a raw clash of grief, stress, and respect lost. Readers will feel her hurt, cheering for her to reclaim her voice and wondering how she’ll confront her husband’s cruelty while protecting her heart and her baby.

‘My husband (35M) keeps calling me (32F) names. How do I get him to stop?’

A new baby and a loved one’s death can strain any marriage, but this husband’s name-calling—calling his wife “bitch” or “imbecile”—crosses into verbal abuse. His stress and grief don’t justify belittling her, especially as she juggles postpartum recovery and primary caregiving. His dismissive apologies and insistence she’s not “contributing” reveal a troubling lack of empathy.

This reflects a broader issue: verbal abuse often escalates after major life changes, like childbirth, when abusers feel emboldened. A 2023 study in the Journal of Family Violence found that verbal abuse correlates with diminished self-esteem in new mothers, risking long-term harm. Her instinct to reject this treatment is a healthy boundary.

Dr. Patricia Evans, an expert on verbal abuse, states, “Abusive words aim to control; stopping them requires clear consequences.” His claim of “high expectations” from his father may rationalize his behavior, but it’s no excuse. She could firmly state, “Name-calling is unacceptable; if it continues, I’ll need space to protect myself.” Documenting incidents and securing support—friends, family, or a therapist—can bolster her resolve. Couples counseling might help if he commits to change, but individual therapy could clarify her next steps if he doesn’t.

Safety is key. If his behavior worsens, staying with a trusted loved one temporarily, as some Redditors suggested, might be wise.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Reddit came through with fiery takes and tough love—here’s the community’s raw feedback:

These bold opinions spark a fire, but do they light the way? Reddit’s intensity fuels debate, yet her path needs a steady hand.

This new mom’s strength shines as she faces her husband’s cruel words, refusing to be diminished. Her story is a call to reclaim respect amid chaos. Readers, have you confronted hurtful behavior in a loved one? How did you restore balance—or walk away? Share your insights below—let’s lift her up!