My (F28) ex fiancé’s (M32) mom is furious about my Facebook post. Did I take it too far?

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In a whirlwind of heartbreak, a 28-year-old woman stared at her phone, the weight of a canceled wedding and mounting debts pressing down. Her ex-fiancé had vanished without a goodbye, leaving her to untangle their shared plans. Desperate for control, she posted on Facebook, seeking a couple to claim their venue date while admitting her pain. The post exploded, but so did the fallout—her ex’s mother fired off a text, accusing her of slandering her son.

This Reddit saga pulses with raw emotion, as a woman’s public cry for help collides with a protective mother’s fury. The post’s viral reach, paired with the woman’s own admission of being mean and controlling, muddies the waters. Readers dive into this messy breakup drama, wondering if her social media move crossed a line or if she’s just reclaiming her narrative.

‘My (F28) ex fiancé’s (M32) mom is furious about my Facebook post. Did I take it too far?’

So in short, my fiancé ended our relationship and cancelled our wedding. He told me on Sunday and left the following Wednesday while I was at work, did not say goodbye. He parting words the night before he left was he felt like we fight too much and do not communicate well. OK.

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This was not new and while I knew he felt that we fought a lot, I didn't know he was ready to leave me. Settling all the wedding contracts, dealing with the honeymoon debt, being left with no car and finally, taking on all the apartment expenses was left to me. I became crippled with depression and in order to take some control back.

I posted on Facebook that I need help finding a couple to take our date since the venue was withholding our total rental amount. I mentioned I was heartbroken, that I needed a couple and how to get ahold of the venue. Well, 200+ shares later, my exs mom steps into the picture. After seeing the hundreds of comments saying I'm better off, to sue him, etc.

She finally sent me a text, one week after she helped move him out. She goes: 'OP, I know you are upset and your feelings are hurt but there are two sides to this story and I don't appreciate these posts of you or other people slandering on my son when they don't know the whole story and you putting his full name out there.

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There are laws for slander and defamation of character. He helped pay for all of this wedding stuff too. Not just you. Hell, we even have helped pay for wedding stuff. This is something you and he need to work out but if this continues I will step up and defend my son. Please be more respectful.'

My reply: (Ex mother in law), this is between (ex) and I. I understand you're feeling protective but it is non of your business. Please keep your opinions to yourself. He is welcomed to call me. Her: Wow, thank you for showing your true colors. I'm grateful he isn't marrying you. He deserves so much better.. Me: Okay ❤️

I had felt like she just rubbed salt in the deepest wound I had. I have been unreasonable in our relationship. Never passing boundaries like cheating or lying, gambling, etc. But I have been mean and controlling. And I wonder if in this conversation, I took the boundary line too far. I know her son means the most to her.

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A woman’s Facebook post after a breakup, meant to recoup wedding losses, spiraled into a clash with her ex’s mother, revealing the perils of public venting. Her admission of being mean and controlling suggests underlying issues that fueled the split, while her post’s tone—possibly airing grievances—ignited family backlash.

Dr. Susan Heitler, a clinical psychologist, notes, “Publicly sharing relationship woes can escalate conflict, especially without mutual accountability” (Psychology Today). The woman’s post, naming her ex, likely felt like an attack to his mother, amplifying defensiveness rather than fostering resolution.

This reflects a broader trend: social media can amplify personal disputes, with 70% of users reporting regret over emotional posts, per a 2023 Pew Research study. The woman’s controlling past and public approach clashed with her ex’s quiet exit, suggesting unresolved communication gaps.

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To move forward, she should privately negotiate wedding costs with her ex, avoiding social media escalation. Reflecting on her controlling tendencies through therapy could rebuild self-awareness. Public apologies, if warranted, might ease tensions with his family.

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit’s gang didn’t hold back, dishing out sharp questions and spicy takes on this Facebook-fueled feud! From calls for clarity to shade-throwing at her controlling past, the comments sizzle with skepticism.

Constant_Link_7708 − It feels like we are missing information. What did you actually write in the post?

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doradiamond − I’m ready to get downvoted to oblivion here but something about this doesn’t seem right. 1. OP admits her and fiancé have been fighting a lot. Does not give detail about these fights, what they’re about, who started them.. 2. OP admits to being “mean and controlling” but doesn’t explain what this entails..

3. OP chose to make a public post, which means that this is no longer a private matter. 4. I’d like to know what OP actually said in the FB posts. It’s clear she included the full name of the person ex - something which is unnecessary - and this makes me wonder if she fully dragged him in the post.

5. The fact that the ex left while OP was out and has had no contact, suggests to me that the ex was afraid. This is the advice we often recommend to women who are trying to escape abusive relationships.

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6. We don’t even know if ex asked MIL to reach out. But to me, this feels like another case of ex being too scared to say anything.. OP, can you please give more details regarding the above?

chez2202 − One question. You told his mum that this matter was between you and him. What about the 200+ people on Facebook? Or is it only YOU that gets to have other people on your side?

Extension_Drummer_85 − Please speak to a lawyer about your obligations re contracts if you haven't already. 

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procrastinating_b − Look, I’m on your side but it’s ironic to say it’s between you and ex when you made the social media post to share it with everyone. Edit: apparently I missed you saying you were mean and controlling, I’m probably not on your side actually. That possibly adds more light to him leaving while you were not home.. But I do think anything you can’t get a refund on should he split half and half.

Specific-Syllabub-54 − I had sympathy up until OP admitted to being controlling. Really of she was truly just trying to recoup some of the funds from vendors and the honeymoon then her post should have only been about that and offering the dates.

People change there mind’s about weddings all the time and back out and elope or end the relationship or need to push back or move up the date or the costs got to be too much and needed to downsize. Something tells me OP Facebook post was bashing on the fiance because as she admitted she was controlling and angry. Her primary goal wasn’t recouping money with the Facebook post it was to gain sympathy points.

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LacyLove − I was totally on your side until I read some of your other posts.. He said I don't treat him or talk to him the way he wants to be treated. had been going through medical issues and was bitchy to say the least so I said things I regret now. he's reconsidering. I've been an a**hole in the past.. You treat this man like this and you are shocked he doesn't want to marry you?.

If your post on FB is anything like this My fiancé broke off our engagement and cancelled our wedding, moved out and left me with all the bills, all the debt and to tell my family what happened, alone.. I can see why his mom was upset.

Take some accountability, you are not the victim here, you admit to being mean, controlling, bitchy, saying things you don't mean, admittedly don't communicate well, and then post some passive aggressive nonsense on the internet and *insert shocked Pikachu face* are now playing the victim when someone got upset.

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imfreenow92 − Your side of the story says you only posted asking for a couple to take your venue date, but MIL says you are slandering her son and using his full name in the post. Which is it? If you did in fact use his name in the post and included anything personal about your breakup then yeah, you are in the wrong.

EmiliusReturns − Yeah, it's pretty obvious you're omitting a lot here. Why did you break up, what did you actually write, etc. How can we possibly judge if you took it too far if we don't know what you actually did? Come on now. However, if you're s**t-talking him in a public FB post, it's not a private matter anymore. You can't post that publicly and then tell her she can't have an opinion.

And it doesn't matter how 'reasonable' you've been, a mother isn't gonna side against her son. You must know that.. But yeah, missing info here. Majorly. ETA; I just realized she admitted to being UNreasonable, mean, and controlling. Oof. Yeah I’m inclined to believe this one’s OP’s fault.

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United-Plum1671 − It’s hypocritical of you to tell her to b**t out that it’s between you and your ex when you put it out there publicly. Your public actions are why she messaged you. Your behavior is why he left and basically ghosted you. Your admitted behavior of being mean and controlling is abusive, so he did what any victim of abuse should do, he left quietly, but quickly.

These fiery reactions cut through the drama, but do they untangle the truth of her post’s impact?

This breakup’s social media splash shows how a single post can turn personal pain into a public showdown. The woman’s heartbreak, tangled with her own flaws and a protective mom’s rage, leaves us pondering the line between venting and vilifying. How would you handle a breakup’s fallout going viral? Drop your thoughts in the comments—let’s unpack this messy mix of love, loss, and likes!

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