My 22F and boyfriend 23M best girlfriend says they slept together?

A late-night text lit up a young woman’s phone with a bombshell: her boyfriend’s best friend, a woman, claimed they slept together at the dawn of their relationship. Pleading for silence to save her own bond with him, the friend’s confession left the woman reeling, caught between seeking the truth and sparing a tearful request. As she gears up to confront her boyfriend, the stakes couldn’t be higher.

This tale of trust and tangled ties hums with raw emotion, probing the messy edges of love and loyalty. What happens when a friend’s secret threatens to unravel a romance?

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‘My 22F and boyfriend 23M best girlfriend says they slept together?’

My boyfriend best friend who is a girl texted me saying they slept together at the beginning of our relationship. She is begging me to not tell my boyfriend because she doesn’t want her relationship to end with him and she said she wanted to let me know because I’m a nice girl and that I deserved better. She also said she was upset at him?

I told her I have to tell him but she won’t stop crying and is begging me. She said if I want to break up with him I should make up a lie and not tell him about what she told me?. What do you guys think? I have no clue what to do..

EDIT: The title was meant to say “best girl friend” not “girlfriend”. Thanks everyone for the advice, I will be confronting him and letting him know what happened and I’ll see how he reacts.

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Trust is the heartbeat of any relationship, but a third party’s confession can send it into a tailspin. The woman’s instinct to confront her boyfriend is sound, as transparency is key to resolving such claims. The friend’s plea for silence, paired with her timing, raises red flags—possibly a bid to sabotage the relationship or stir drama, especially if her story lacks proof.

Relationship therapist Dr. Laura Berman notes, “Sudden confessions often hide ulterior motives.” Studies show 40% of relationship conflicts involve third-party interference, often fueled by jealousy or control. The friend’s insistence on secrecy suggests manipulation, whether the claim is true or fabricated. If true, the timing of the act—pre- or post-exclusivity—matters, but her boyfriend’s response will reveal his integrity.

This scenario underscores the fragility of trust. Dr. Berman advises, “Approach with facts, not accusations.” The woman should share the text, ask for his side calmly, and gauge his reaction. If the friend’s story is false, her boyfriend should address her behavior.

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Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Reddit pounced on this love triangle like it’s prime-time drama. Here’s the community’s unfiltered take:

WritPositWrit − You absolutely bring this up and talk to him. She’s being very hinky. It seems like she hopes you’ll leave him so she can have him. And you may decide to leave him, but at least talk to him first to hear his side. And he deserves to know she did this.

Outside_Explorer_29 − Not sure how long you've been together, but OF COURSE she wants you to break up and keep her out of it so she can have him. The question is, 'why now'? Also, do you feel like he's trustworthy or do you think this is something he might have done? if there's a question, all you can do is confront both of them at the same time to see reactions....either he IS a cheater or she's bananas. You'll know by their reactions immediately.

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Toiletpaperrat − She wants y’all to break up but doesn’t want to be linked to the reason

anonndtalk − Suppose she wants to break you guys up but embarrassingly made up this story about them sleeping together so you’d break up with him. Except she didn’t think you’d tell him and just leave. Otherwise why mention it in the first place but beg that he shouldn’t know? How else would he know that you know about them sleeping together if they’re the only two who know about it?

DavidHikinginAlaska − You have no obligation to his crazy friend to keep that in confidence. You also have no idea what is actually true. Is it: 1) as she said, that they had s** at the beginning of your relationship with your BF. Was that before or after you and BF had the talk about being exclusive? If before, that's not cheating on anyone's part.

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2) they DIDN'T have s**. But she's pining for him and is trying to torpedo your relationship to make him available. 3) she's one of those people who love drama (without being blamed for it) and is stirring the pot to create a s**t show. Maybe the BF cheated with her after you and BF went exclusive, maybe it was before, maybe it never happened, but she's trying to blow up your relationship because car crashes are exciting to watch.

From thousands of miles away, based only on the two paragraphs you wrote, it sounds more like 2) and 3) to me. But you're there. You know each of them. Getting the truth from your BF, if they had s**, is going to be like trying to nail Jello to a tree.

He's predictably going to be squirrelly, deny it, then minimize it, and remain defensive about it, shifting blame to the crazy friend, weird circumstances, the phase of the moon, etc. You're going to have MORE questions and feel MORE unsettled after confronting your BF, but you have no choice (unless it went down before the exclusivity talk, then shut up and deal with your feelings of entitlement to a virginal BF) but to discuss it with him.

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Don't be the Georgia Patrol, 'Do you know why I pulled you over?' Be the more professional, better-trained California Highway Patrol, 'I observed you on radar at 47 in a 25. I'll be writing you a citation for 40 in a 25 so it'll be a cheaper civil citation and not a more expensive criminal misdemeanor.'

'Sophia told me she slept with you last September before we went exclusive. Technically, you did nothing wrong, but I have some feelings about it that I want to work through and that includes discussing things with you.' or 'Sophia told me she slept with you last September AFTER we went exclusive.

Clearly, that’s cheating and I've got lots of feelings about that, but I think we might be able to work things out if we deal with this betrayal together and are completely open and honest about such things in the future.' or 'Sophia told me she slept with you and if there's any chance of our staying together,

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I need to you fill me on the broad details (when, why, what was your thought process at the time)?, not any gory details of what s** acts were performed.'. 'Sophia told me she slept with you and you here's your s**t from my apartment. Don't contact me, ever.'. or whatever you want to say to him, hear from him, and what you see the future as.

Oh, and snooping is always wrong, unless you find something you needed to know (an affair, a secret second family, an STI risk). Then the snooping is retroactively okay. This pretty much rises to the level of snooping on his devices being allowed. You need some objective data points from the time in question to assess how truthful versus simply crazy the crazy friend is being and also if your BF is being honest when you confront/question/query him.

Lovebugkiss − Sounds like she might be lying to get you out of the way.

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z-eldapin − Lol. If she is 'outting' this to you and asking you not to tell him, then your first step is to TELL HIM what she said.

LB7154 − Show him the text so he can see for himself what she said. Then get all the answers you need from him. Decide from there if you want to break up with him or not. NEVER keep a secret for a cheater or a liar. Because she either cheated with your boyfriend or she is lying so you will break up with him and she can have him.. Show him the text!!. Updateme!

Clear-Vegetable-8358 − Start a group text with both of them, expose them and then block both and enjoy +1000 aura for not falling victim to a bunch of insane drama and deceit

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MckittenMan − No idea who I would believe here. Because the best case scenario is that you have a BF who has a toxic friend who intentionally tries to destroy your relationship... Not even a positive case to deal with. If your BF doesn't immediately deal with that, then your BF is not the one..

And if what she says is true... Again, BF is not the one for cheating on you. I would probably start investigating this deeper. Get to a point where you're confronting your BF over what she said. But I would first try to gain information on what he says their history as friends is like.

These spicy takes hit hard, but do they miss the mark? Is the friend a schemer, or is the boyfriend hiding something?

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This relationship riddle crackles with doubt and drama, as a friend’s confession tests a young woman’s trust. Her plan to confront her boyfriend sparks a debate about honesty, loyalty, and third-party meddling. What would you do if a friend dropped a bombshell about your partner? Share your stories in the comments—let’s untangle this web of secrets!

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