I’m a 21F that has had Tinder for 6 months with zero matches. What’s wrong with me?

Shirley Stafford Hours
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In the glow of a smartphone screen, a young woman’s hope for love flickers. Six months on Tinder and OKCupid, swiping eagerly, yet not a single match or reply. At 21, she wonders if something’s “horribly wrong,” her confidence shaken by the silence of online dating. Hesitant to share her profile but desperate for answers, she turns to Reddit, seeking clues to unlock her dating drought.

This isn’t just about apps; it’s a raw dive into self-doubt and the art of digital first impressions. As she navigates the brutal world of swipes, Reddit offers practical tips and tough love. Readers will feel her sting of rejection and ask: is it her profile, the app, or just bad luck? Let’s swipe into this modern dating mystery.

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‘I’m a 21F that has had Tinder for 6 months with zero matches. What’s wrong with me?’

This may be a stupid question, but I'm attempting to date and signed up for Tinder a while ago. I've been swiping and stuff but haven't gotten a single match. Any messages I send are not answered. I'm not that pretty or anything but I thought on apps like Tinder I'd at least get one answer from a guy. Is there something horribly wrong?

I'm not open to posting pictures (here on reddit, there are pictures on the profiles), but could you think of any situations in which a 21 year old girl wouldn't receive any online dating attention?. Same thing happened with OKCupid too, btw.. 

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

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Zero matches on Tinder signal a glitch—technical or presentational. Dr. Jess Carbino, a sociologist and former Tinder researcher, notes that “profile optimization is critical in algorithm-driven dating apps” (Dr. Jess Carbino). Let’s break it down.

The woman, actively swiping for six months, faces an unusual drought. No matches suggest issues like poor photos, a vague bio, incorrect settings (e.g., mislabeled gender preferences), or a shadowban from a new account. Tinder’s algorithm favors active, visually appealing profiles; OKCupid rewards detailed ones. Carbino’s studies show 80% of matches hinge on photo quality and bio clarity (Journal of Social and Personal Relationships).

This reflects a broader issue: navigating online dating’s visual bias. With 50% of users reporting profile struggles (Pew Research Center), presentation is king. Even average looks can shine with strong photos and wit.

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Carbino suggests a profile overhaul: 4-6 diverse, high-quality photos (smiling, active shots), a concise, confident bio with unique traits, and verified settings. Joining r/Tinder for reviews and checking for bans can help

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit jumped on this dating dilemma like it’s a tech support hotline, tossing out fixes and reality checks with zest. It’s a virtual workshop where everyone’s a coach. Here’s the crowd’s unfiltered take:

maracay1999 − The main reasons a 21 year old girl wouldn't receive *any* tinder matches are:. 1) No pictures in profile. 2) Very bad pictures / very physically unattractive (sorry). 3) Saying something crazy in your profile (eg. 'Put a baby in me now!')

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amateurbeard − Not much advice we can give without being able to see your pictures and/or bio. Might have better luck on /r/Tinder, they do profile reviews there.

soclose_yet_sofar − This happened to a friend of mine. Turned out that somehow her Tinder profile was set to 'gay man'. While she was seeing plenty of attractive guys none of them were into her for obvious reasons. I don't know how easy it is to make this mistake (I've never used Tinder) but you may want to double-check your settings.

Tiway22 − Are you fat?

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honeypuppy − Sometimes Tinder blocks profiles. You didn't create a brand new Facebook profile for Tinder by any chance? Because any 21 year old girl who has swiped more than a handful of guys is pretty much guaranteed at least one match, even if it was some guy swiping everyone.

lochsloy1911 − I would look into whether your tinder is actually broken or something. You say you swipe mostly right to anyone in your age range. So you're not being really picky and just swiping a few people. If you've been swiping right to hundreds of guys, at least a few of them should have matched you unless you are just very unattractive, or your photos make you seem that way at least.

Before tinder changed to limit the amount of likes you got, most guys just swiped right on every single person without even looking really to increase the amount of matches. Now it's pretty much the same, but when I see a girl I definitely do not consider attractive, I'll swipe her left so I don't waste a like on an obvious no.. If your profile isn't broken, I think you're falling into that 'obvious no, swipe left' category.

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What you write in your profile really doesn't matter at all, most guys won't look at it probably. Aside from people who really do only swipe people they're really interested in, most people will just swipe based on picture and if it's a match that's when they read the profile.

Even if you were not that attractive, I'd still expect you to get some matches just because people have different tastes and some people are more willing to overlook things or lower their standards hoping to get laid. It doesn't mean you'd want to match with those people necessarily, but still I'm just surprised you're not even getting matches with those kinds of guys.

I would make sure your tinder isn't broken, and then I would start consider things that you can positively change in regards to your appearance. Haircut, makeup, fitness, try to look happier in the pictures, take better pictures in general. You want to maximize all the things under your control that you can to positively influence things if you're not that attractive.

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Those are good things to do in general. They're more optional if you're already pretty good looking, but the less attractive you are the more effort you'll have to put into it. It's maybe not fair, or right that things are the way they are, and ideally we'd all find people regardless of that stuff but that's just not how things are really.

SomeWittyResponse − Well, I've never used Tinder so I can't say for certain. But my guess is (1) an unflattering photo paired with (2) an uninspiring profile in (3) a big market ... will make it harder to get attention. Are you in a bigger city? Like some place with a population near or over a million people? Can you get a better photo?

One with better lighting and a better camera angle. Maybe also ask on /r/makeupaddiction for advice on makeup. Lastly, check your profile and make sure there are no spelling or grammatical errors. Then consider the content. Re-write it to be non-generic, more entertaining, etc.. Good luck.

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[Reddit User] − No pictures usually means no replies.

SokyokuOzai − Ok so sadly I am a moderator on OKC .... Without knowing your account name I can't look you up and see. So I'm going to assume some things based off the conversations here. For best results you want 4-6 pictures.

Make sure your smiling in at least one (not the creepy 'I'm taking a photo smile' but a 'I'm at least pretending to be happy' smile, a real smile is best) have a few pictures where your doing something and not focused on the camera. (These are important)

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In your profile don't put in things like 'I'm looking for blah' or 'knowing doctor who is a plus'. You will alienate possible matches. Your profile instead should be similar to a sales pitch. It's goal is to advertise 'you' . keep it short, confident (important), and vague.

Toss in some important stuff but leave out things so you have room to discuss them and the other person can 'learn' about you. With OKC answering those questions they have is also important. Most sites don't use them though so it's kind of just a Cupid thing.

Your photos are your cover and the profile information has to be your introduction (or the back of the book). If you like nerdy people drop in a clue or two that the nerds would catch but a non nerd won't notice. Disclaimer... The most successful profiles cheat...

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They add in a 'slutty' photo or play the 'ditzy easy' girl. They also are the profiles that get turned back on the most often because it attracts the wrong people. Be your self and eventually you'll find the right person...

BeepBeepRichie1 − How are you sending messages if you haven't matched with anyone? I thought you could only send messages to your matches, or has that changed since I used it?

These Redditors pinpoint profile flaws—bad photos, dull bios, or app glitches—like a mis-set gender filter or shadowban. They urge better visuals and a r/Tinder review, though some blunt takes sting. Are they on target, or too harsh? One thing’s clear: this matchless mystery has everyone buzzing.

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This Tinder tale reveals the harsh grind of online dating, where a 21-year-old’s zero-match streak sparks self-doubt. Reddit’s sleuthing points to fixable flaws—photos, bios, or app bugs—offering hope if she revamps her approach. In the swipe game, presentation and persistence rule. As she retools her profile, one lesson shines: confidence, not looks, wins matches. Ever hit a wall in online dating? Share your tips below!

For those who want to read the sequel: [UPDATE] I am a 21F that has had Tinder for 6 months with no matches?

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