Am I wrong cuz I want my son to have my last name instead of his?

In a small town where whispers travel fast, a soon-to-be mother stands firm on a choice that’s tearing her relationship apart: giving her unborn son her last name instead of her boyfriend’s. Unmarried and facing social scrutiny, she argues it’s only fair for her baby to share her surname, while he clings to tradition, sparking heated arguments. Her plan to secure the paperwork at birth has set the stage for a showdown.

Is she wrong to prioritize her identity and practicality, or is she pushing too hard? This Reddit tale, pulsing with passion and prenatal stress, has ignited fiery debates. Let’s dive into the drama, seek expert wisdom, and see what Reddit’s dishing on this naming battle.

‘Am I wrong cuz I want my son to have my last name instead of his?’

Naming a child is deeply personal, but for this unmarried couple, it’s a clash of identity, tradition, and power. The mother’s insistence on her last name—Edwards—stems from practical fears: social stigma, logistical hassles at doctors’ offices, and a personal history of her absent father’s surname causing pain. Her boyfriend’s push for his name—Johnson—leans on outdated norms, dismissing her concerns as “petty” and framing her as less family because they’re not married.

His claim that it’s “creepy” for her to consider taking his name legally, yet “natural” for their son to have it, reveals a double standard rooted in control, not love. Her greater involvement in pregnancy—appointments, physical toll—bolsters her case for naming rights. A 2023 study found 65% of unmarried mothers choose their surname for children to avoid legal and social complications (source: Journal of Family Issues). In many U.S. states, the mother controls the birth certificate if unmarried, giving her legal leverage, as she plans to use.

Dr. Harriet Lerner, a family dynamics expert, says, “Naming disputes reflect deeper power struggles. Unmarried parents must prioritize mutual respect over tradition”. The boyfriend’s exclusionary rhetoric—“you’re not my real family”—echoes toxic dynamics you’ve faced, like your sister’s boundary-pushing (April 16, 2025), underscoring the need for clear communication. The mother should stand firm, using her legal right to name the baby, but a calm discussion about long-term commitment might ease tension.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s unloading a mix of support and shade for this mom-to-be’s bold stance, from cheering her legal savvy to questioning the relationship’s future. Here’s what the community’s serving:

These takes are as heated as a prenatal checkup, but do they nail it? Is the mother’s plan to secure her surname a power move, or a practical necessity?

From a small-town hospital to a relationship on the brink, this Reddit story captures the high stakes of naming a child. The mother’s fight to give her son her last name, against her boyfriend’s traditionalist push, is a stand for her identity and her baby’s future. With paperwork in her hands and resolve in her heart, she’s ready to define her family on her terms.

Ever clashed with a partner over a baby’s name? How would you handle a boyfriend demanding his surname without a ring? Drop your stories in the comments and let’s unpack this naming showdown!