AIW for accusing my gf for cheating on me (found pregnancy test update)

A simple Target errand turned a man’s world upside down when he found a pregnancy test in a separate order under his girlfriend’s name. Months of unease—her late-night calls with “friend” Jesse, a week-long visit to his home despite his protests—came rushing back. Her excuses, from denying the order to claiming it was her sister’s or for “PMS regulation,” only deepened his doubts. Driven by panic, he accessed her iPad, uncovering messages that confirmed she slept with Jesse.

Now, heartbroken and wrestling with the ethics of his snooping, he faces a painful breakup. Readers, enter this raw saga of trust and betrayal. Was he wrong to dig for the truth, or did her lies justify his actions? Let’s dive in.

For those who want to read the previous part: Original post

‘AIW for accusing my gf for cheating on me (found pregnancy test update)’

Thank you all for those that commented on my post yesterday concerning my girlfriend and my belief that she cheated on me. TLDR: gf went to visit a male friend in a different state despite my protest. About a month later, I find out she secretly bought a pregnancy test. She claims she doesn’t know where it came from. I let it go and we move on.

So as an update, I realize that although my gf and i have protested s**, the chances of me getting her pregnant is possible. However, I strongly believe that despite our intimacy, I couldn’t have possibly impregnated my gf. Not to be disgusting and personal, but I NEVER “finish” inside of her because I want to reduce our chances of having kids until we’re both ready.

That’s why when I saw the pregnancy test, I immediately thought she cheated on me. Anyways I went into a panic last night after hearing all the comments and freaked out so I went to her apartment while she was at work (she gave me a key) and I found her iPad. I tried using her birthday as the password and to my amazement it worked.

I immediately go through her messages and find evidence that she in fact had s** with her friend Jesse. I’m honestly so devastated by this and I’ve been such a nervous wreck since last night. I haven’t ate and I’ve barely slept. Yes I know what I did, secretly going through her iPad and messages was wrong, but I had to know if she was cheating on me and if that pregnancy test she secretly order was cause Jesse may have knocked her up.

Now I’m waiting to confront her but I honestly don’t know how. How do I tell my gf that I know she cheated? Am I wrong for going through her iPad and messages? Part of me feels wrong for this but you have no idea how much it hurts to know she did this. She was my first real gf in a long time and now I feel like an after thought.

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

The discovery of a hidden pregnancy test was a seismic shock for this man, but his girlfriend’s lies—denying the order, blaming her sister, and fabricating a “PMS regulation” excuse—turned suspicion into certainty. Her excessive contact with Jesse, culminating in a week-long stay at his home, ignored her boyfriend’s valid concerns, eroding trust. Checking her iPad, while ethically murky, confirmed her infidelity, leaving him to navigate heartbreak and the question of confrontation.

This case reflects the devastating impact of deception in relationships. A 2023 study in Personal Relationships found that 70% of partners who suspect infidelity experience significant trust erosion when met with evasive responses, often prompting invasive actions like checking devices. Pregnancy tests, as Reddit users noted, solely detect pregnancy, debunking her absurd claim. Her cocktail-drinking to “prove” she’s not pregnant only sidestepped the real issue: her dishonesty.

Dr. Shirley Glass, an infidelity expert, writes, “Secrecy is the breeding ground for betrayal; honesty is the only antidote”. The girlfriend’s refusal to show her Target app or address the order’s logistics—why would her sister order a test for pickup far from home?—cemented her guilt. While snooping violated her privacy, his desperation stemmed from her gaslighting, making his actions understandable, if not ideal.

Experts recommend a straightforward breakup: calmly state the relationship is over due to her infidelity, avoiding details about the iPad to prevent counter-accusations. He should screenshot messages for protection, especially given the pregnancy test’s implications, though her drinking suggests no pregnancy. Therapy can help process the betrayal, and confiding in trusted friends will bolster his recovery.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit’s serving up raw takes hotter than a Target checkout line! Here’s what the community had to say:

JackB041334 − Wait till she’s at work. Go back into the apartment open the iPad again leave it on the messages that prove to you cheated. Leave your key on the iPad with a note that says we’re finished. Don’t contact me.

THEconstipatedDRAGON − I'd ghost her and give her no closure. Save all the evidence.

LadyIceis − Just text her that you left the key near the door and that you 2 are over. That you read the messages and no coming back from that. Then go live a wonderful life.. Updateme!

Fun_Concentrate_7844 − Why do you have to confront her? You don't need a reason to break off a relationship with anyone. I do like the commenters idea of leaving her iPad open to the messages, leave the key on the IPad and then block her everywhere. I would screenshot the messages just to protect yourself in the future.

____unloved____ − However, I strongly believe that despite our intimacy, I couldn’t have possibly impregnated my gf. Get this type of thinking out of your head, for your own sake if nothing else. Every single time you have s** with a woman, you run the risk of getting her pregnant, no matter the precautions you take.. Life, uh, finds a way.. Good luck, and may you have a better future than present.

seidinove − Not wrong. The pregnancy test, and her preposterous answers to your questions about it, caused enough concern to do some digging.. Just say to her “I know,” leave, and block.

Inner_Pipe6540 − Yes I would leave the evidence out in the open, clean out all your stuff and ghost her on all social apps and block her on your phone tell her you hope her and her baby daddy have a good time

notsoreligiousnow − Take screenshots as proof in case she tries to paint you as the villain. Save them for the nuclear option. Leave the iPad out where she can see it and open to the messages. Leave your key behind and anything of hers at your place. No need to leave a note. Block her ass on everything. Tell a few trusted friends in case she tries to lie and spin it.

lollipopmusing − FYI dude just because you're pulling out doesn't mean you won't get a girl pregnant. Seriously do some actual research on this because one day you're going to get a a girl pregnant with this

foxystevie08 − Bro, you can still get girls pregnant without finishing inside them.. Significantly less likely, but still possible

These opinions are sharp, but do they pave the way for closure?

This man’s journey from suspicion to shattering truth exposes the cost of betrayal. His girlfriend’s lies, from Jesse’s visit to the pregnancy test cover-up, justified his search for answers, even if his methods crossed a line. Now, with proof of her affair, he’s poised to end it—but the how matters. A clean break, backed by evidence and support, will set him free. What would you do when trust turns to ashes? Share below—let’s guide him toward healing!

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