AITAH for not inviting my sister to my wedding bc she always “jokes” about sleeping with my fiancé?

Picture a cozy family gathering, laughter filling the air, until a single comment slices through the warmth like a chilly breeze. For one bride-to-be, her sister’s relentless “jokes” about stealing her fiancé have turned wedding planning into a battlefield. What started as awkward quips has spiraled into a full-blown family feud, leaving her questioning if she’s the villain for wanting a drama-free day. With her October wedding looming, the sting of betrayal and the weight of family pressure collide, making her stand feel both brave and isolating.

The bride’s frustration is palpable—she’s not just planning a wedding but fighting for respect in her own love story. Readers can’t help but wonder: where’s the line between harmless teasing and outright disrespect? Her tale of setting boundaries amid family chaos hooks us, promising a juicy dive into loyalty, love, and the courage to say “enough.”

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‘AITAH for not inviting my sister to my wedding bc she always “jokes” about sleeping with my fiancé?’

The Reddit post lays bare a saga of sibling rivalry and crossed lines. Here’s the bride’s raw account of her sister’s behavior and the fallout that followed:

Ok so I’m getting married in October. small, chill, nothing crazy. should be a happy time right?? Except my older sister (31F) has this thing where she constantly flirts with my fiancé (29M). Like aggressively. And it’s always under the guise of “omg I’m just joking don’t be so sensitive”

First time she met him, deadass said “wow you upgraded, I’d let him ruin my life too” IN FRONT OF ME. I laughed it off bc I didn’t want to seem insecure but like. Wtf?? Then she started with the “if you ever get bored of her, you know who to call” comments. again, in front of me. I told her it was weird and she rolled her eyes and said I’m too uptight.

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She's made so many lil jabs. 'I saw him shirtless once, damn girl you got lucky' … “if you die first I call dibs” … “too bad you got to him first lol” like it NEVER ends. My fiancé thinks it’s awkward but tries to ignore it.He’s not flirtatious back. But he also doesn’t really shut it down either. just gets uncomfortable and laughs nervously.

last weekend was the last straw. We were at my parents’ house and I left to grab something from my car. Came back and heard her saying (I swear I’m not making this up). “I mean... if you’re having second thoughts, I’m always available. Just kidding. Unless?”. Like. the unless? was real. that’s not a joke anymore.

That’s a g**damn come-on. I snapped. Told her she’s disgusting and can’t come to the wedding. She flipped. Cried. told my mom I was being dramatic. Now the whole family’s saying I’m “ruining the family over a joke” and she’s “just always been flirty” and “doesn’t mean anything by it” I don’t even care if she meant it or not anymore. I just don’t want that energy around me when I’m trying to get MARRIED.

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But now it’s this whole thing and I’m apparently the villain for “excluding” her and “making it a bigger deal than it is”. AITAH for uninviting her or is this actually insane?? bc at this point I feel like I’m losing it.

Family gatherings shouldn’t feel like a tightrope walk over a pit of awkwardness. The bride’s sister, with her relentless “joking” flirtations, has turned a joyous occasion into a test of boundaries. The bride’s decision to uninvite her sister reflects a desperate need to protect her peace, but the family’s pushback highlights a classic clash: personal limits versus collective harmony. The sister’s comments, especially the brazen “unless?” moment, suggest a mix of envy and boundary-testing, while the bride’s fiancé’s silence adds a layer of unease.

This scenario mirrors broader issues of sibling rivalry and respect in relationships. A 2019 study in the Journal of Family Psychology found that sibling conflicts often stem from perceived favoritism or competition, which can fester into adulthood. Here, the sister’s “jokes” may mask deeper insecurities, but that doesn’t excuse their impact.

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Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, notes, “Respect is the foundation of any healthy relationship, and that includes respecting boundaries set by others”. Applying this, the sister’s refusal to stop, despite the bride’s discomfort, signals a lack of respect, justifying the bride’s firm stance. The fiancé’s passive response, while not malicious, risks enabling the behavior, suggesting a need for clearer communication.

For solutions, the bride could initiate a calm, private talk with her sister, outlining specific boundaries and consequences. Couples counseling might help the fiancé address his discomfort assertively.

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit’s hot takes are as spicy as a wedding toast gone wrong! Here’s what the community had to say about the bride’s dilemma:

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RoutineAcademic7428 − NTA. why the f**k would you ever make comments like this about someone’s significant other?? especially in private to him with you not around. instead of admitting her wrong, she continues to gaslight you into believing you’re insecure/overreacting. ultimately it’s your wedding and if she can’t respect you and your boundaries then she doesn’t have to be there.

AwayElephant4323 − Not inviting her ass is the best thing you can do she’s the type in my opinion that will try to outshine you on your big day, i get she’s your sister but damn i would never do that to any of my sisters that’s so disrespectful!

ACM915 − NTA your sister is making a play for your fiancé and would like nothing more than to bust up your relationship so that she could have him. There is nothing wrong with you setting strong boundaries and your parents need to have a come to Jesus talk with your sister about her behavior and stop enabling her.

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IntelligentRuin9143 − Heres the truth, the sister fancies her sisters bf. How would she react if it were other way round.? seen too many fights and betrayals on social media that these jokes and feelings, can ruin lives. If i were in a situation like this id never bring a girl home, as its always a recipe for ruination. my advice go no contact

Emergency_Kick_1539 − “Oh my god [Sister’s Name]! Stop thirsting after [Fiance’s Name]! He doesn’t want to f**k you, even if he were single!”. Say that really loud where family can hear and I guarantee it’ll stop.

Odd_Lab_3871 − no you’re not the a**hole, but if your family wants to side with that home wrecker you should tell them all to f**k off too.

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AggravatingSock6502 − NTA, and this is a classic case of FAFO for your sister. For your family members coming after you, ask them to explain 'the joke' and why it's funny. Watch them squirm trying to explain. And if they keep hammering on, 1) ask them if they'd be okay with their sibling/a close friend saying the exact same thing to their spouse, and 2) uninvite them too.

AnnualDuck5818 − She’s definitely testing the waters. Next time there’s going to be her bikini bottom and top floating in it. You did the right thing!

springflowers68 − NTA Doubtful these relatives would think her actions funny if the so-called jokes were directed toward them. Keep your peace, stick to your decision. If your relatives boycott your wedding, shame on them. Someone should have shut down her antics years ago.

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WinterFront1431 − She's trying to pass them as jokes, but she really thinks she stands a chance. It's your wedding and I'd tell anyone who didn't like it to not come as well as all you need is you and your fiancé there.

These opinions are fiery, but do they capture the full picture, or are they just fanning the flames of drama?

The bride’s story is a rollercoaster of loyalty, love, and family friction, leaving us cheering for her courage while wincing at the fallout. By uninviting her sister, she’s drawn a line in the sand, but at what cost? Her tale reminds us that weddings aren’t just about vows—they’re about standing up for what matters. What would you do if a loved one’s “jokes” crossed into disrespect? Drop your thoughts below and let’s unpack this messy, marvelous drama together!

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