AITAH for getting upset with my MIL for calling my son by the wrong name bc she “likes it”?

A name is more than just a word—it’s a symbol of love and identity. For one couple, their joy in naming their 4-month-old son Brooks turned sour when the husband’s mother began calling him Brooklyn, a name typically used for girls, simply because she “likes it.” Despite their request to stop, she doubled down, even writing “Brooklyn” with a smiley face on his Christmas gifts. This small act has stirred big emotions, leaving the couple wondering if they’re overreacting.

Living across the country and renting a house from her complicates matters, making it hard to set firm boundaries. Is their frustration justified, or should they let it slide? Let’s explore their story and the community’s take.

‘AITAH for getting upset with my MIL for calling my son by the wrong name bc she “likes it”?’

The couple’s pride in their son’s name, Brooks, clashed with his grandmother’s preference.

The distance and their living situation add layers to the tension.

Brooks isn’t just a name—it’s a deliberate choice tied to their son’s identity.

A name carries deep meaning, and dismissing it can feel like a personal slight.

The core issue is the mother-in-law’s refusal to respect the couple’s choice to name their son Brooks, instead using Brooklyn despite their objections. This isn’t just about a name—it’s about boundaries. Writing “Brooklyn” on gifts after being asked to stop suggests a lack of respect, which can erode trust. Dr. Susan Forward, an expert on family dynamics, notes, “Disregarding boundaries is a form of control” (Toxic In-Laws). The mother-in-law’s actions may reflect a desire to assert her preferences, but they undermine the couple’s authority as parents.

At the same time, her living across the country limits the immediate impact, and the couple’s dependence on her rental property complicates their options. Society today places high value on respecting parents’ naming choices, as they tie to a child’s identity. The smiley face on the gift adds a layer of dismissiveness, making her intent feel less innocent.

The couple should have the husband address this directly with a clear, firm conversation, stating that only “Brooks” is acceptable. If she persists, returning gifts or playfully calling her by a wrong name could highlight her behavior. Long-term, they might explore reducing reliance on her property to gain more freedom in setting boundaries. Keeping open communication with each other will ensure they stay united.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

The online community jumped in with a mix of humor, firm advice, and balanced takes, mostly siding with the couple.

Some suggested lighthearted ways to push back on the mother-in-law’s behavior.

Others urged stronger measures to reinforce the couple’s stance.

A few users offered insight into the name’s context while still supporting the couple.

What makes it even more complicated is the couple’s reliance on the mother-in-law’s property, which limits their leverage. The community agrees that her disregard for their wishes is disrespectful, urging them to hold firm while finding creative ways to address it.

Respecting a child’s name is about honoring their parents’ choices and identity. Small acts of defiance, like using the wrong name, can chip away at trust. Setting clear boundaries is essential, especially in complex family dynamics.

What should the couple do if their MIL keeps calling their son Brooklyn? How can they maintain peace while protecting their boundaries, especially since they rent her house?