AITAH for dropping my sister as my son’s godmother for wanting me to pay her to babysit?

A single mother thought she had a fair arrangement with her sister until dating brought hidden tensions to the surface. Living together started as a practical solution during a difficult chapter of her life, offering shared support and stability. What makes the situation more complicated is how unspoken expectations slowly turned into resentment on both sides.

As the mother began seeing someone seriously, childcare needs became more predictable, and her sister’s willingness to help suddenly shifted. Accusations of manipulation, arguments about money, and questions about what being a godparent truly means now threaten both their living situation and family bond. The disagreement leaves readers questioning where reasonable boundaries end and entitlement begins.

‘AITAH for dropping my sister as my son’s godmother for wanting me to pay her to babysit?’

It began with a living arrangement meant to help both sisters survive.

I'm a single mom, widow and about 2 years ago my sister moved in with me to help out. The deal was I could watch her dog whenever she slept...

and she could watch my kid when she was home so I could go out and have a life (date). Recently a man asked me out and I was not...

I work full time, run a side business, and a full time parent to a 5yo. Money's really tight and I can't afford a baby sitter so I asked my...

Things shifted once dating became more consistent.

We really hit it off and have been seeing each other for 3 months now. My sister keeps acting put out by the demand of babysitting now.

She's canceled many of our dates so my now boyfriend has been paying for a sitter. My sister made a big scene saying she has boundaries now and can only...

The disagreement quickly turned personal and emotional.

I've never asked for anything to watch her dog and I'm very concerned with how she's playing the victim here, calling me manipulative (in front of my son even),

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and asking for payment to ever hang out with her godson!!! Am I wrong to be upset here? Is it wrong to expect a godparent to want to spend time...

Without being begged or bribed? I swear she's just jealous and can't stand to see me happy. None of this was an issue till I found a good man. AITAH???

At its core, the issue revolves around differing views of fairness. One sister sees a mutual exchange of support, while the other views childcare as labor that requires compensation. When roles are blurred between family, roommates, and caregivers, resentment can build quietly until a triggering event exposes it.

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Opposing perspectives tend to focus on responsibility. Supporters of the mother emphasize emotional support and the symbolic role of a godparent. Others argue that childcare is fundamentally different from pet care and that living together already involves shared interaction with the child. From this angle, payment is not a lack of love, but a boundary.

On a broader level, the story highlights how financial stress magnifies interpersonal conflict. When money is tight, even small changes in routine can feel threatening. Without renegotiating expectations openly, both sides may feel taken advantage of. Clear communication, rather than assumptions based on family roles, is often the deciding factor in whether these arrangements survive.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Many users immediately sided with the mother, urging firm boundaries.

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spirosoflondon − Throw her and her dog out of your house and life

Moist-Rule8457 − NTA but start saying she can pay for you to watch her dog

Significant-Yak-2373 − Why are you still letting her live in your house? Sounds like she is taking the p__s!

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New_Day684 − Nta time for you to set a no free pet sitting boundary.

gringaellie − NTA tell her you will no longer be watching her dog and that she'll have to take the dog with her every time.

Some commenters offered mixed or critical takes, pointing out shared responsibility.

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Used_Mark_7911 − ESH She’s paying rent so you can’t accuse her of freeloading. The conflict is whether you think the care you provide for her dog is equal to the...

I think one could argue it’s equal especially since she is gone a lot. However, I’m not clear on how much she helps with your child the rest of the...

Assuming she’s only expected to help with child one night a week that sounds pretty fair. The reason I think ESH is that you are ready to bring down your...

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It sounds like you do need a roommate to help pay the bills. Would you rather living with our sister or a stranger? Does her not wanting to babysit for...

You said that godmother to you means who would take care of your child if you died. Is there actually another person you could choose who would be willing and...

Would she be willing to help you out 2x a month instead of every week? I also don’t think it’s a bad an idea for your bf to help pay...

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SignificantOrange139 − Mmm, I have mixed feelings but I'm actually leaning towards YTA here. She moved in to help you out. She pays rent.

And while you keep saying that it shouldn't be a big deal for her to hangout with her godson for free - she literally lives with her godson. And I...

Because I've lived with my own nieces and nephews. You can't live with kids and never interact with them. Doesn't work that way. You're quick to wanna jump to extreme...

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if you want to have a social life - you have to pay for it - or make sure you're spacing it out so as to not take advantage of...

On occasion, I'll offer it up for free. But I see them 5 days a week. I'm not also giving up my weekends so that she can have a life...

wee_idjit − YTA and an unreliable narrator. Your sister pays half the rent, even though she is one of 3 residents. Babysitting is not "hanging out" with the child she...

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It is a serious responsibility. With a dog, you just feed and water and make sure they don't chew the sofa.

With a child, especially a small child, you can't turn your head for a minute. Charge her to watch her dog if you want, but don't blow smoke up Reddit's...

A few responses added blunt or practical observations.

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Nedstarkclash − WTH. Being a godmother does not equate to providing free baby sitting, as some of the respondents seem to suggest. It is fair to ask the sister for...

Twinkle_Starss − NTA. But for me your sister's demands are unfair.

This situation shows how quickly family support systems can fracture when expectations are no longer aligned. What once felt like teamwork now feels transactional, leaving both sisters frustrated and defensive. The disagreement raises questions about obligation, fairness, and how much family roles should influence daily responsibilities.

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Should godparent status come with practical expectations, or is it purely symbolic? When family members live together, where should lines be drawn around money and childcare? Readers are invited to reflect on how they would handle similar boundaries in their own lives.

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