AITA For throwing a “breastfeeding party” and not excluding formula feeding?

Six months ago, nine close friends welcomed their babies into the world in the span of just one wild week. The little ones became instant playmates, sharing milestones and even birthdays—two of them cousins born on the exact same day. As the babies hit the six-month mark, the grueling early days of parenthood felt worth celebrating.

One mom, the group’s go-to planner, suggested throwing a get-together to mark the occasion. What started as a lighthearted joke about a “breastfeeding party” quickly snowballed into real drama when her sister got upset over who was invited. The sister felt the event should only include moms who exclusively nursed, sparking a heated debate that left everyone questioning where things went wrong.

‘AITA For throwing a “breastfeeding party” and not excluding formula feeding?’

It all kicked off when nine close friends went through pregnancy together and ended up delivering in the exact same week, making their babies a tight-knit crew from day one:

Seven out of the nine chose to try breastfeeding, with varying degrees of difficulty, and four managed to do it exclusively:

But the sister kept commenting on how tough breastfeeding is and how adding formula makes things “so much easier”:

This tale hits right at one of the most sensitive spots in modern parenting: the subtle battles between moms over feeding choices, especially breast versus bottle.

Throwing a get-together that highlighted “breastfeeding achievement” accidentally drew lines in the sand, even if the organizer meant no harm. The sister went the opposite extreme, wanting to gatekeep the event for only the “truly dedicated” nursers. Both sides fueled the tension by turning a celebration into a comparison game.

Psychologist Gina Hassan, PhD, who specializes in postpartum mental health, wrote in Psychology Today: “The pressure to breastfeed can lead to intense feelings of guilt and shame for mothers who can’t or choose not to, while those who do breastfeed may feel judged for continuing too long. These ‘mommy wars’ often stem from insecurity and societal expectations rather than actual differences in parenting quality.”

Instead of zooming in on feeding methods, new moms could rally around shared struggles: sleep deprivation, anxiety, body changes. A simple “we survived the first six months” hangout would feel inclusive and supportive, without anyone feeling sidelined or judged.

See what others had to share with OP:

Pretty much everyone online agreed the whole “breastfeeding party” concept was off from the jump, no matter who came up with the name:

A lot of folks pointed out how it could make moms who don’t exclusively nurse feel bad or left out:

Others called out the cliquey vibe and the labels people were using:

Some felt the organizer stirred the pot by gossiping about the sister’s comments:

A few lighter or sharper takes slipped in to break the tension:

In the end, most people felt that spotlighting breastfeeding in the gathering created unnecessary division among new moms who are already under enough pressure. The organizer didn’t mean to exclude anyone, and the sister took it too far the other way, but both added fuel to the fire.

Ultimately, a fed baby and a healthy mom are what matter, no matter the method. New moms deserve support, not side-eye over choices they often have little control over. What do you think – would you ever throw (or attend) a feeding-specific mom celebration, or is keeping things inclusive always the better move?