AITA for purposefully having a 10-11 year engagement?
In a cozy apartment filled with dreams and determination, a couple’s decade-long engagement tells a story of love shaped by ambition. Since their teens, they’ve charted their own path, secretly pledging to marry while pursuing medical school and career goals, only revealing their commitment to appease traditional families. Their plan for a 2020 wedding crumbled under a global crisis, pushing their vows to 2022—a delay that’s lit a fire under their relatives’ old-school expectations.
The sting of family criticism burns, with accusations of “living in sin” and doubts about their commitment cutting deep. Yet, this couple’s choice to prioritize personal milestones over a rushed courthouse ceremony reflects a modern love story, one where patience battles tradition. This tale pulls readers into a vibrant clash of devotion, independence, and familial pressure.

‘AITA for purposefully having a 10-11 year engagement?’







This long engagement saga captures a couple’s steadfast commitment against a backdrop of familial disapproval. Their choice to delay marriage for career goals shows discipline, but their families’ outrage over “living in sin” reveals a clash between modern values and traditional expectations. The 2022 postponement, driven by a pandemic’s uncertainty, is practical, yet it fuels accusations of insincerity.
A relationship counselor once noted, “Couples thrive when they align on shared goals, not external pressures.” The couple’s secret engagement and strategic cohabitation reflect a partnership built on mutual respect, not defiance. Their families’ focus on a swift marriage overlooks the legal and emotional benefits of waiting, like ensuring financial stability or a dream ceremony.
This situation mirrors broader tensions in evolving family dynamics, where younger generations prioritize personal growth over rigid traditions. The families’ criticism, especially about the fiancée’s age, ignores how average marriage ages have shifted—29 is now common in many regions. Their insistence on a courthouse wedding dismisses the couple’s vision for a meaningful celebration.
To ease this rift, the couple could share their reasoning calmly, emphasizing their commitment and practical concerns like vendor availability. Inviting family input on smaller wedding details might soften tensions. For now, their resolve to wait shows strength, proving love doesn’t need a ring to endure.
Here’s what the community had to contribute:
Reddit’s community rallied behind the couple, calling their families’ reactions outdated and overbearing. They praised the pair’s dedication to their goals and each other, noting that a decade-long engagement and a pandemic-driven delay don’t diminish their commitment.
Commenters criticized the “living in sin” rhetoric as archaic, urging the couple to ignore family pressure and stick to their 2022 plan. Many saw the families’ push for a quick courthouse wedding as dismissive of the couple’s autonomy, affirming their right to define their own timeline.


















This decade-long love story proves commitment isn’t measured by a marriage license but by shared dreams and resilience. The couple’s choice to wait for their perfect moment, despite family backlash, sparks a conversation about balancing tradition with personal goals. How do you navigate family expectations in your relationships? Share your thoughts and let’s dive into this drama!
