AITA for not letting a woman leave the shop even tho her baby was crying?

In a bustling shoe shop, the air hums with the soft clatter of heels and the occasional squeak of new soles. Amid this everyday chaos, one employee faced a heart-wrenching dilemma that left them tossing and turning all night. A woman, her baby crying in her arms, set off the store’s alarm while rushing to leave, claiming a medical emergency. What seemed like a routine security check spiraled into a storm of guilt, accusations, and a sleepless night filled with doubt.

The employee, torn between store protocol and the woman’s desperate pleas, followed procedure, only to face her wrath and a haunting accusation: “If my baby dies, it’s on you.” This Reddit tale captures the clash between duty and empathy, pulling readers into a moral tug-of-war. Was the employee wrong to prioritize their job, or was the woman’s reaction a deflection? Let’s dive into this emotionally charged story.

‘AITA for not letting a woman leave the shop even tho her baby was crying?’

I work in a shoe shop, and as you know almost all the shoes are alarmed. Yesterday a woman came in and got a couple of shoes. While she was looking for the shoes, her baby started crying but she didnt care and spent 20 minutes in the shop. I didnt see her going to the cashier since I was at a different part of the shop.

When she got out the alarm went off so i stopped her and asked to check her bags. She told me that her baby was sick and they had to go to the hospital as soon as possible. I told her that it wont take long and asked to see her bags. She refused and kept on telling me her baby was sick.

I called my manager and our manager told the woman that as an employee, I had to check the bags since it was the procedure. She started crying, shaking and screaming telling me her baby's stituation is going worse and i was the reason for it. The security came in and looked at the bags, turns out there was an alarm left on the shoes.

(It didnt take more than 2 minutes to remove and check the bags.) While she was leaving she kept screaming 'If my baby dies, its on you.' Which kept me awake whole night. Today is my free day and turns out the woman came in to the store telling her baby has been kept in the emergency room for the whole night and day,

and if they could help the baby earlier they would be home in the night. My coworker told me all which made me feel horrible. I'd get fired if I didnt check her bags and the baby was crying while she was shopping, and she didnt care. But I still feel like I did the wrong thing.

EDIT: Sorry for not making it clear, she purchased the shoes but there was a secret alarm in the shoes, they did not inform us about those. So its not the cashier's fault, the box wasnt labeled. Edit2: we did not check her purse, only the bag which had our products in!

Edit3: im not in the US, our policy is supported by laws, we are allowed to check the bags has our logos on them, if it has a different brand's logo, we ask for that shop's employees to come and check. update: as my manager informed me, she stayed in the shop two hours and waited for me to come, cops were called, thank you all for your comments!

Navigating a high-pressure situation like this can feel like walking a tightrope. The employee faced a classic conflict: adhering to workplace rules while grappling with a customer’s distress. According to Dr. Amy Canevello, a psychology professor specializing in interpersonal relationships, “Empathy in high-stress situations requires balancing compassion with responsibility. Ignoring protocol can lead to chaos, but rigid adherence risks alienating others.” In this case, the employee’s insistence on checking the bag was driven by store policy, likely reinforced by legal and job security concerns.

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The woman’s refusal to cooperate, despite her baby’s cries, raises questions about her priorities. If her child was truly in crisis, why linger for 20 minutes shopping? This suggests a possible exaggeration or deflection, a tactic sometimes used to avoid scrutiny. A 2023 study on retail theft by the National Retail Federation notes that 70% of shoplifting incidents involve deliberate distractions, including emotional appeals. The employee’s suspicion, while uncomfortable, wasn’t baseless.

Still, the employee’s guilt reflects a broader issue: the emotional toll of enforcing rules in human-centered environments. Dr. Canevello advises, “Clear communication and quick action can de-escalate such conflicts.” The employee could have offered empathy—“I’m so sorry, this’ll be quick”—while following protocol, potentially easing tensions.

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Check out how the community responded:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, serving up a spicy mix of support and skepticism. Here’s the raw scoop from the crowd, dripping with candor and a dash of shade:

Prechrchet − NTA: I kinda doubt her baby is in the ER. For one thing, if it was, she would still be there with them, not coming back to the store to tell someone off.. Clear con, she is upset that she didn't get away with it.

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TallOccasion4453 − NTA. If the baby was so sick, she should have went out of the shop way earlier. She stayed a good 20 min while ignoring the baby’s crying, then she can stay 2 minutes while you check her bag and help with the alarm, something that could get her in trouble an next time or in another shop.

It sucks that her baby is sick, but i do have my doubts that it’s realy true. Cause if the baby was so sick the. It was also sick in the 20 minutes that it was crying in the shop and that didn’t stop hee from shopping….

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OptmusJonzz − NTA She blames you for lateness and overnight stay, but she delayed the baby getting help by not paying attention to it until her shoe shopping was done. Not you. You did your job. Honestly she should have never shopped for shoes. The baby didn’t become urgently sick as soon as she was done shopping, it. Was crying before she got there (a great indicator that something’s wrong). Don’t feel too bad.

[Reddit User] − NTA. The woman is full of s**t. The hospital told her no such thing. She was humiliated and is lashing out to make herself look better

4614065 − NTA. If the baby was so sick she shouldn’t have been shoe shopping (thieving?) in the first place.

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Buck_Slamchest − NTA. Definitely not on you. There are people in this world who would quite happily use their children to steal things and not feel bad about it so you did what you had to do under the circumstances.

meifahs_musungs − You were lied to. The lady did not take baby to emergency. Check inventory. That lady stole something.

Hazelwood38 − Nta Her complaints about how much time it was taking was her own fault. In the time it took her to tell you “my baby is sick” is twice as much time as it would have taken to find and remove the alarm. She also wasn’t so concerned about her child for the 20 min it took her to shop.

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Fun-Two-1414 − NTA. The whole process would have been quicker if she had just let you check the bag. Its standard protocol for someone to check you bags if the alarm goes off. Everyone knows this.. You have a job to make sure people are not stealing.

Plus, she obviously couldn't have been that worried if she was shopping for 20 minutes whilst her baby was crying. If anything happened to the baby, it would be her fault for wasting time shopping.

lunadoesntloveyou − NTA. If she truly cared about her baby she would have left the shoes and went to the hospital immediately. I feel like her baby being sick was just her attempt at trying to sneak away with stolen shoes.

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These Redditors rallied behind the employee, pointing out the woman’s questionable choices and possible manipulation. Some called her story a con, others a distraction from potential theft. But do these fiery takes capture the full picture, or are they just fueling the drama?

This tale of alarms and accusations leaves us pondering the fine line between duty and compassion. The employee’s choice to follow protocol was justified, yet the lingering guilt and the woman’s dramatic return highlight the messy human side of retail life. It’s a reminder that snap decisions can carry heavy emotional weight. What would you do if you were caught between a crying baby and a job you couldn’t risk losing? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

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