AITA for not buying milk for my son?

A mom’s at her wit’s end when her 8-year-old son keeps pouring milk down the sink, even though he loves drinking it. Despite trying everything from scolding to hiding the milk, his odd habit won’t quit, pushing her to ban milk from the house entirely. But when her mother-in-law calls it “child abuse,” she starts questioning herself.

Shared online, this story sparked a lively debate about parenting, waste, and hidden mental health issues. Is the mom too harsh, or is her son’s quirky behavior a sign of something deeper? Dive in to find out.

‘AITA for not buying milk for my son?’

The mom opens up about her son’s charming yet peculiar traits:

My (34F) son is 8 years old. As far as my husband and I know, our son is a completely normal child for his age. Sometimes he can be a...

but he is overall a good child who likes riding his bike around the neighborhood with friends, playing Roblox, and painting fruit (yes, fruit. He likes painting watermelon, kiwis and...

His strange habit came to light with a shocking discovery:

There's only one, tiny aspect of him that is... well, very, very peculiar. My son will pour himself a glass of milk, and then drain the rest of the milk...

Stunned, she tried to understand his reasoning:

When I first saw my son pouring the milk down in the sink, I was shocked and asked him why he did that. He said he just liked how it...

Despite her efforts, the behavior persisted:

The second time, I got angry and told him not to. I explained to him that he's wasting money and food. But he just kept doing it. From there on...

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I gave him time outs, I grounded him several times, I took away his electronics, etc. I told him he wasn't going to drink milk that day. I tried hiding...

Then I bought those those pint sized cartons instead of jugs, but he would literally open every single unused carton and pour it down the sink.

Frustrated, she gradually cut back on milk until it was gone:

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So I started to only buy milk every other week at the store. Then I started to buy milk only once a month. Then I stopped buying milk overall, because...

He would drink 3 cups of it every single day by himself. When I stopped buying milk, he would just kind of m**e around the house looking for something to...

He says water doesn't quench his thirst like milk does. I said he could drink milk all he wants if he stopped pouring it down the drain. He said okay,...

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Three months later, her mother-in-law’s reaction stirred drama:

It's been about 3 months now with no milk. I do have a few cartons of those shelf stable milk cartons hidden away in the pantry just in case, but...

My MIL recently came over to babysit for an evening and was very shocked to find out that we have no milk in our house.

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When my husband and I came home that evening, she yelled at us and called it child abuse that we would deprive our son of essential nutrients during a critical...

This story sheds light on a parenting puzzle: an 8-year-old’s bizarre habit of pouring milk down the sink, despite loving it. The mom’s attempts at discipline—time-outs, hiding milk, switching to smaller cartons—failed to stop it, leading to a milk-free home. Her mother-in-law’s “child abuse” accusation adds tension, but the real issue seems to be the boy’s underlying compulsion.

Child behavior expert Dr. Russell Barkley notes, “Repetitive behaviors like this in kids can signal obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or another neurological issue. Punishment doesn’t work because the child can’t fully control it.” The boy’s fixation on watching milk drain might fulfill a psychological need, like calming anxiety, that he can’t articulate.

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The mom’s creative efforts to curb waste were reasonable but missed the root cause. Banning milk stops the behavior temporarily but doesn’t address why it’s happening. A child psychologist could help, especially since this quirk is milk-specific, which is unusual for his age.

She might try alternatives, like using a clear container for him to see the milk without pouring it or redirecting his urge with colored water play. She should also calmly explain to her mother-in-law that this isn’t neglect but a response to an uncontrollable habit. A family discussion with professional guidance could align everyone.

This tale highlights the need to spot psychological signs early. The mom’s not wrong for teaching accountability, but long-term solutions lie in professional support, not just discipline.

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Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Many online users sided with the mom but urged professional help:

808Q − NAH. That sounds like something psychological like obsessive/compulsive behavior. Seek professional help for him.

Mirianda666 − NTA but it sounds like your son is experiencing a compulsion in regards to the milk going down the drain. Just like adults, children can develop compulsive behavior...

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You've removed the milk from the house but the compulsion still remains . I'd suggest a consultation with a child psychologist who will be able to suggest therapeutic options for...

Don't wait for your son to 'outgrow' this problem on his own because compulsive behavior doesn't just go away all by itself. If you block it in one direction, your...

FeedThePug − NTA - You can make sure he gets the nutrients he needs in other ways. I would consider talking to a professional about this issue, though. This is...

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DeadliftingDreams − NTA I do agree that kid needs to see a professional. Compulsive behavior usually starts with start you don't notice and then spirals out of control with puberty....

Sounds like MIL just got sucked into the propaganda . Outside of the USA and central Europe, most people are lactose intolerant and don't drink milk after weaning.

Some focused on discipline and nutrition:

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bitternerdette − NTA If he wants to watch coloured water going down the drain, MIL can get him some paints, or water soluble food dye to use if she's that...

Wasting food for entertainment, is a waste of resources, and a waste of money. Not to mention he stops other people from enjoying it. He is old enough at 8...

DrBrein − NTA your MIL is misinformed. Lots of children can’t drink milk and are not malnourished. If he’s wasting it he doesn’t need it. Next time he asks you...

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v2den − NTA. He is 8. He doesn't **need** milk like your MIL is trying to imply. There are plenty of other foods he can eat to get proper nutritions....

Have you try putting a lock on the fridge? Then when he wants milk, he has to ask you or your husband. You then let him take the milk out,...

A few comments added a lighter touch to ease the tension:

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Princesssassafras − NAH I was eight when I started to notice my OCD, I just didn't know what it was at the time. He probably needs to see a doctor....

If this is his only hang up you may have thought he was just pushing boundaries (all children do) so I won't say you're an AH. I will say that...

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Have you considered putting it in a clear container like glass or a plastic bag? Perhaps he's seeing if the milk is "clean" and he can't tell in the cartons...

TheYearOfThe_Rat − Is this post for real? You should have gone to the neurologist and a psychiatrist like yesterday because it sounds like your son has compulsive repetitive behavior which...

neronesbestfriend − NTA. I agree with the comments who suggest you to seek psychological help for him and do not underestimate. But geez is your MIL serious? Chill out, MIL....

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This story uncovers a parenting challenge, where an 8-year-old’s milk-pouring quirk raises questions about discipline versus mental health. The mom’s efforts to curb waste make sense, but her son’s behavior might signal a deeper issue. What do you think? Should she stick to the milk ban or seek help to understand her son’s actions? Share your thoughts!

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