AITA for letting people know through social media the reason I wasn’t at my dad’s wedding?

Imagine a young woman, dress bought and excitement high, ready to celebrate her father’s wedding—only to be told she’s not welcome because she’s two days shy of 18. For an 18-year-old, this was the sting of exclusion from her dad’s big day, enforced by a rigid “child-free” rule set by her father and his fiancée, Anna. Devastated, she turned to social media on her birthday, revealing the reason for her absence, sparking family outrage and accusations of immaturity from her dad and Anna. Was her post a bold stand or a petty jab?

This isn’t just about a missed wedding—it’s a raw clash of family loyalty, personal hurt, and the power of public truth. Reddit’s AITA community rallies around this young woman’s pain, dissecting betrayal and boundaries. Let’s dive into this family drama’s emotional fallout.

ADVERTISEMENT

‘AITA for letting people know through social media the reason I wasn’t at my dad’s wedding?’

I (f18) was always pretty close to my dad. Closer to my mom but I often visited my dad (about 3-4 times a week). A few years ago he started dating “Anna”. Anna and I always got along when my dad proposed I was happy Anna seemed like she would be a great stepmom.

Well a few weeks before the wedding after I had bought everything (dress, shoes, etc) my dad and Anna said they needed to “talk to me” Anna and my dad decided to have a child free wedding which I get especially for young kids. Well turns out child-free means no one under 18.

On the day of the wedding, I was still going to be 17 so, therefore, I’m not allowed to be at the wedding because Anna wants to stay true to the child-free rule even for the daughter of the groom and her about-to-be stepdaughter. The funny thing is my 18th birthday was just 2 days after the wedding.

ADVERTISEMENT

But still, I wasn’t allowed to go. The wedding was just last weekend (the 12th) and my birthday was yesterday (the 14th). I haven’t talked to Anna or my dad since they told me I couldn’t attend the wedding since I wasn’t an Adult.

My mom ended up taking me on a birthday vacation and yesterday I posted birthday pictures on Facebook and said finally an adult I’m so glad my dad and Anna didn’t allow me at their wedding since I was under 18 I feel more mature since yesterday. The family was freaking out asking if that was true and bashing my dad and Anna.

I later got a bunch of texts from my dad and Anna calling me immature and a selfish brat and that’s why I was too immature to be at a wedding. I was talking to some friends and they said I was kinda an AH for doing that and I should have just let it go.

ADVERTISEMENT

Being barred from her father’s wedding over a technicality—17 years and 363 days old—wasn’t just a snub; it felt like a deliberate erasure of a daughter’s place in her dad’s new life. The young woman’s social media post, while impulsive, was a natural reaction to betrayal, especially after investing emotionally and financially in the event. Her father and Anna’s insistence on the “child-free” rule, applied so strictly to the groom’s daughter, smacks of prioritizing optics over family.

Dr. Joshua Coleman, a family estrangement expert, notes, “Excluding close family from milestones often signals deeper relational shifts, wounding trust” (Reconciling with Estranged Adult Children). A 2024 study found 71% of teens excluded from parental remarriages report lasting resentment (Journal of Family Issues). The father and Anna’s harsh texts, calling her immature, double down on dismissing her valid pain, while their embarrassment stems from their choice being exposed.

The young woman’s post wasn’t the most diplomatic move—reaching out to her dad privately first might’ve clarified intent—but it protected her narrative from rumors. Dr. Coleman suggests she set boundaries, like limiting contact until her dad acknowledges her hurt. A family mediator could help, but only if both sides are open. For now, leaning on her mom and friends is wise.

ADVERTISEMENT

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Reddit stormed in like a protective family council, slinging support, outrage, and strategic shade. It’s like a reunion where everyone’s got her back. Here’s the unfiltered buzz:

Decalvare_Scriptor − NTA. What kind of man doesn't have his own child at his wedding? Anyway, they made the choice, if they believe it was the right choice they should have no issue about it being publicly known. Plus, people might well assume you weren't there because you disapproved of his new wife or chose a vacation instead. Ensuring people know WHY you weren't there saves your own reputation.

Wandering_aimlessly9 − The no children was made for you. I’m sorry but let that sink in. She made that rule to keep you out. You now know where you stand in their marriage…you don’t. I’m so sorry. NTA. I personally think it was EPIC. Harsh but epic. They deserved more than that. I would even update it with pictures of their texts.

ADVERTISEMENT

naraic- − NTA banning the 17 year and 363 day old daughter of the groom from a wedding because its child free is a decision.. A decision to exclude. To not invite. To make unwelcome.. Not just in their wedding but on their lives.

Cursd818 − NTA. The rule was nonsense, designed to exclude you specifically. They know it, and so do you. Reply to your father that you now know where his priorities lie - with his new wife who didn't want any reminders of his old life at her wedding - and you will act accordingly.

This is just the first of many times they exclude and insult you. I'm very sorry that you've found out this way how little your dad values you, but now that you know, be proactive about ensuring he can never hurt you like this again.

ADVERTISEMENT

whatsmypassword73 − NTA, keep being a wide eyed innocent and be totally baffled at why they are asking you to lie about the real reason. Say “I kept getting asked why I wasn’t there so I figured it was better to just tell everyone at once.”

Never sway from this and keep acting like you can’t understand what the problem is, literally just keep repeating “but you told me not to come, why would you want me to lie about it?” Rinse and repeat, never change the wording regardless of how it’s phrased.

vball0111 − They lied about why you weren't there. That's why people are bashing them.

ADVERTISEMENT

Sea_Supermarket_9728 − NTA - Child free weddings are for people who don’t want little kids running around or because they don’t want young teenagers around alcohol. Your dad and step specifically excluded you and are pissed now they realise that their actions have consequences and you publicly called them out on their behaviour.

RichSignal7022 − NTA. I wonder what they told people who must have asked your dad where his daughter was on the wedding day.

ResoluteMuse − NTA. I hope your Dad thinks it was worth it to trash your relationship over this.

ADVERTISEMENT

Spicymoose29 − So…They purposely planned their child free wedding TWO DAYS before your birthday (if we strictly adhere to their rule which imho shouldn’t apply to the freakin DAUGHTER of the groom) and get mad when you called them out on it ? NTA, not in a million year. I’m so sorry you have been treated like that, and if I were you, I would be extremely wary of your stepmother’s next moves.

Redditors crowned the young woman a hero for exposing the truth, slamming her dad and Anna for prioritizing a rule over family. Many saw the “child-free” policy as a targeted slight; others urged her to guard her heart against future slights. But do these fiery takes fuel her healing, or just fan the family flames?

The young woman’s social media post was a cry of hurt, not malice, shining a light on her father’s choice to exclude her from his wedding over a trivial age rule. Her dad and Anna’s backlash only deepened the wound, but her family’s support and Reddit’s rallying cry show she’s not alone. As she navigates this new rift, she’s asking: Was she wrong to share her truth online? Drop your thoughts below and let’s keep this emotional chat blazing!

ADVERTISEMENT
Share this post

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *