AITA for laughing in my ex’s face and telling her that she can’t expect people to respect her relationship when she ain’t even respecting theirs?

In a quiet suburban home, a father’s laughter echoes as his ex-partner delivers an audacious demand: their 16-year-old daughter must end her three-year romance to protect her own scandalous affair. Years after her infidelity tore their family apart, this mother now entangled with her daughter’s boyfriend’s stepfather insists on “respect” for her illicit relationship. The absurdity of her request, layered with hypocrisy, sparks a fiery retort from a dad fiercely protective of his daughter’s happiness.

Annie, a vibrant teen, and her devoted boyfriend Louis face an unthinkable ultimatum, caught in the crossfire of adult betrayals. As family tensions flare and relatives weigh in, this father stands firm, championing his daughter’s right to love. A saga of loyalty, hypocrisy, and teenage romance unfolds, revealing the messy truths of co-parenting through a storm of drama.

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‘AITA for laughing in my ex’s face and telling her that she can’t expect people to respect her relationship when she ain’t even respecting theirs?’

So my (40M) ex (39F) cheated on me when our daughter Annie was 6, we have been co-parenting for 10 years now and our daughter now 16 years old has been in a relationship with her bf Louis (16M) for 3 years now, if I have to describe Louis he's a amazing guy and treats her like a princess.

His parents were teens when they had him and his twin sister, their stepdad had been raising them since they were 8 and they has now younger siblings as well. Recently his mother has found out that his stepdad cheated on her with my ex. My ex wants to continue the relationship with him.

She says in order for that to happen, Annie has to end hers with Louis. My ex doesn't allow Louis in her house anymore and apparently even told his mother that she needs to force him to end his relationship with Annie, but his mother flipped her off saying 'I don't care about you or him (the mother's soon to be ex husband)

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I'm not gonna ruin my son's 3 year relationship for two people who can't even keep a relationship' my ex has came to me saying that people need to respect her and her relationship and I laughed in her face and said that she can't expect people to respect her relationship when she isn't even respecting theirs

now her relatives are calling me a a**hole, saying that my daughter is young and will get more guys eventually and that it is not the end of the world if her and Louis break up. So AITA?

Navigating co-parenting is tricky enough without one parent’s affair upending a teenager’s stable relationship. This father’s ex, entangled with her daughter’s boyfriend’s stepfather, demands Annie sacrifice her three-year romance to ease her own relationship’s fallout. Her hypocrisy—expecting respect for a cheating liaison while disregarding her daughter’s bond—highlights a self-centered disregard for family dynamics. The father’s laughter and blunt retort reflect a justified defense of his daughter’s autonomy.

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Infidelity disrupts families beyond the couple, often impacting children’s trust and relationships. A 2023 study from the Journal of Family Psychology notes that parental infidelity can strain parent-child bonds, especially when one parent prioritizes personal desires over their child’s well-being. Here, the ex’s attempt to control Annie’s relationship risks alienating her daughter, while her ban on Louis at her home reeks of punitive overreach. The father’s stance, backed by Louis’s mother, prioritizes the teens’ happiness over adult drama.

Dr. Susan Heitler, a clinical psychologist, states, “Healthy co-parenting requires putting children’s emotional needs first, not leveraging them for personal gain”. The ex’s demand undermines Annie’s agency, potentially harming her trust in relationships. Her relatives’ dismissal of Annie’s three-year bond as fleeting ignores the depth of teenage love and the stability Louis provides. Conversely, the father’s support fosters Annie’s resilience, especially vital at 16, when teens in many regions can influence custody arrangements.

The ex’s affair and her ultimatum are her own to resolve—Annie and Louis shouldn’t pay the price. The father should maintain an open door for Annie and Louis, ensuring a safe space, and consider legal advice if the ex’s actions escalate into parental alienation. Resources like The Co-Parenting Handbook by Karen Bonnell can guide him in shielding Annie from further conflict. His fierce loyalty sets a powerful example, showing that love for a child trumps petty adult disputes.

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Heres what people had to say to OP:

Reddit’s community overwhelmingly backed the father, slamming his ex’s delusional hypocrisy. Commenters called her demand to end Annie’s relationship absurd, noting her affair with Louis’s stepfather disqualifies her from preaching respect. Many praised the father’s sharp comeback and urged him to keep supporting Annie and Louis, with some suggesting Annie could choose to live with him if tensions escalate.

Others highlighted the ex’s pattern of disrespecting relationships, from her past cheating to her current sabotage, and cheered Louis’s mother for her fierce stance. The consensus was clear: the ex’s drama doesn’t justify disrupting a teen’s happy romance.

Jay_A_Why − Not the a**hole. Pretty cut and dry. She is trying to sabotage her daughter's relationship, so she can further her own already-dysfunctional relationship.

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Sparklingwine23 − NTA, your ex and his stepdad are real losers, who does that to their kid? And the step dad is literally cheating so that 'relationship' can't go anywhere for a long while anyway.

rocketmn69_ − She hasn't respected any of her relationships.. Tell your daughter that she's welcome at your house anytime and Louis can even visit

FitOrFat-1999 − 'it is not the end of the world if her and Louis break up.' It's not the end of the world if your ex and her current fuckbuddy break up either. I'm sure he's one of many in a long line.. 'people need to respect her and her relationship'. You mean they're NOT?? I'm shocked, shocked! /sarc off. NTA. How are your daughter and her boyfriend taking this? They need your support.

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Dlraetz1 − Your ex needs to lose custody

Ballas333 − Wtf? NTA. Your ex is delusional, which I'm sure you already know. But that line goes hard. Neither her nor the step father get any say in what happens in Louis' life, and the fact that she's willing to force her daughter to end a long term relationship should tell you how much her opinion should matter in regards to your daughter.

Special_Lychee_6847 − Ypur daughter is 16, you say.... At what age do children get to decide which parent they want to live with, in your region, OP?. Parental alienation is absolutely fine, if the parent is doing its own alienation.. I bet your daughter has plenty of support, with you and her boyfriend's mother.. If your ex didn't want things to be ackward, perhaps she shouldn't have done a Jerry Springer herself.. NTA. And please don't back down.

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notabear87 − Your ex is s**iopath. Good on you for dumping her that first time holy s**t.

doncroak − Nta. Your ex doesn't care about anyone but herself. Does she want to destroy her relationship with her daughter also?

BraveWarrior-55 − So I don't understand why your ex and Louis's stepdad cannot remain an item if Louis and your daughter stay together? What am I missing because these two relationships are mutually exclusive, right? Your ex will have the freedom with her new beau without the messiness of having Louis around at all.

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Maybe Louis doesn't even want to be around his cheating stepdad anyway (I mean isn't he staying with his mom, who got cheated on?) Your ex's relatives also think that your daughter has to break up with her boyfriend because of who her mom is now shagging?? WTAH??

This tale of a father’s stand against his ex’s shameless hypocrisy is a testament to prioritizing a child’s happiness over adult egos. Annie and Louis, caught in a web of betrayal, deserve to nurture their love without their parents’ drama casting shadows.

The father’s laughter and sharp truth cut through the nonsense, affirming his role as Annie’s rock. As he navigates co-parenting through this storm, his unwavering support lights the way. Share your thoughts or experiences below—how do you protect kids from adult conflicts in blended families? Let’s keep the conversation alive.

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