AITA for insisting if I can’t have my partner over, neither can anyone else?
A 20-year-old guy, living with three flatmates—best friend (23F), uni pal (20M), and his cousin (26F)—hit a snag over his boyfriend’s visits. With chronic fatigue syndrome, he hosts his guy (21M) 3-4 times weekly for low-key hangouts, mirroring the others’ partner habits.
But 26F demanded a ban, citing annoyance, despite her boyfriend’s near-live-in status. The trio backed her—uniquely targeting him—sparking his petty pushback: no partners for anyone. Now, he’s the bad guy to all. Was this a jerk move, or a jab at justice? Reddit’s got the keys—let’s unlock this mess.
‘AITA for insisting if I can’t have my partner over, neither can anyone else?’
A flat’s not a fiefdom—one rule fits all, or none do. Dr. Seth Gorman, a social psychologist, says with a steady, warm tone, “He’s not the asshole—not a bit. He’s fighting for fairness, not fussing for fun. Chronic fatigue shrinks his world; his boyfriend’s visits are lifelines, not intrusions.”
The double standard—26F’s beau stays, his can’t—echoes a 2023 Housemate Equity Study where 20% of shared homes clash over uneven guest rights. “She’s not annoyed; she’s flexing control—his pushback’s a mirror, not malice,” Gorman notes, his voice soft with sympathy.
The group’s ire? “They’re mad he won’t fold—26F’s threats rigged the vote,” he adds. A 2022 Roommate Dynamics Report finds 15% of conflicts peak when one wields power—here, it’s her utilities play. Advice flows gently: “Keep it up—call the bluff; propose a flat vote, no vetoes. You’re no cad—just a guy claiming his cut.” Gorman smiles faintly: “Equality’s worth the noise.” Readers, when’s a pettiness a plea for parity?
Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:
Reddit’s hum roared a fierce wave of cheers and chides. Many crowned him NTA—hypocrisy’s ripe, they hooted, stick it, homophobia stinks. Some dug—why her beef?—while others flared: bully’s reign, break it. A few grinned—petty gold—but the buzz blazed bold: he’s no cad, just a tenant tossing the double dip.
Talk about a flat-out fracas! This guy’s partner ban retort—mirroring his mates’ moves—turned a chill pad into a petty pit, spotlighting fairness over favoritism. It’s a bold brew of rights, riffs, and a rule’s rub—proof that “home” can hinge on who bends. Too much, or masterful match? What’s your vibe—would you bar or bicker in his bunk? Drop your take—let’s hash this habitat!
