AITA For cancelling my daughters therapy because she has bad grades?
In a quiet suburban home, the aroma of home-cooked meals signals a teen’s slow return to life. A 14-year-old girl, once silenced by severe depression and social anxiety, now chats with friends and savors her mom’s cooking, thanks to three months of therapy. Her parents, initially overjoyed, face a new rift: her grades remain dismal. Her father, frustrated by the $120-per-session cost and fixated on academic success, pulls the plug on her therapy, believing it’ll push her to study harder.
This isn’t just about report cards; it’s a heart-wrenching clash of priorities. The mother, fiercely protective, vows to fund the sessions herself, while the daughter pleads to continue. The father’s decision, now a Reddit firestorm, exposes a deeper struggle: valuing grades over mental health. As the family grapples, the teen’s fragile progress hangs in the balance, stirring a mix of hope and heartbreak.
‘AITA For cancelling my daughters therapy because she has bad grades?’
Parenting a teen with mental health challenges is a delicate dance, and this father’s choice to cancel his daughter’s therapy over grades missteps gravely. The 14-year-old’s progress—eating, socializing, and opening up—shows therapy’s impact, yet her father prioritizes academics, risking a backslide. His logic, tying therapy to grades as motivation, ignores the complexity of depression, while his wife’s resolve to pay independently highlights their divide.
Mental health stigma often skews parental priorities. A 2024 study by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) reveals 65% of parents underestimate depression’s impact on teens’ academics (nami.org). The father’s view of his daughter as “back to normal” betrays a misunderstanding of chronic conditions like depression, which require ongoing care.
Psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour, in a 2023 New York Times article, states, “Mental health treatment is not a luxury; it’s a lifeline for teens”. Damour’s perspective underscores the danger of halting therapy abruptly, especially for a teen showing progress. Grades often lag behind emotional recovery, as cognitive functions take time to rebound.
To move forward, the father should educate himself on depression’s long-term nature, perhaps through family therapy to align priorities. Reinstating sessions, as he did, is a start, but consistent support is key. The mother might involve school counselors to address academic struggles separately. The situation highlights the need to prioritize a teen’s well-being over societal markers of success, fostering a healthier family dynamic.
Here’s what the community had to contribute:
Reddit erupted with unanimous outrage, condemning the father’s decision as shortsighted and harmful. The community views his cancellation of therapy as akin to denying medical care, emphasizing that his daughter’s emotional gains—eating, talking, socializing—are the real progress.
Many call his focus on grades ignorant of depression’s impact, with some labeling it borderline abusive. Commenters praise the mother’s stand and urge the father to prioritize his daughter’s mental health over academic expectations.
![[Reddit User] − YTA. “seeing no progress” are you serious? She’s healing from depression, talking to family and friends, eating: that’s *the progress* you want to see. I’d pay every dollar I have to see my daughter heal and feel better, who cares about the grades. Also, depression is not something you switch on and off, saying things like “now that she’s back to normal” clearly means you know nothing about depression.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/172257cc-06.png)
![[Reddit User] − YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA you're crazy you only care about what you daughter brings to you not her well-being. you can't be seriously this stupid and malicious to be asking this question.](https://en.aubtu.biz/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/172257cc-14.png)
This father’s story is a stark lesson in the cost of misjudging mental health’s weight. His daughter’s therapy, a lifeline for her depression, was nearly severed by his fixation on grades, threatening her fragile recovery. His wife’s defiance and Reddit’s wake-up call pushed him to reverse course, but the rift lingers.
The story underscores the need to champion a teen’s well-being over external achievements. Readers are invited to share their experiences navigating mental health and family expectations.
