Wife Plays House With New Boyfriend While Her Husband Sits in Prison, Now She Wants a Baby

One 28-year-old wife found herself in a tangled double life when her husband’s unforgivable family betrayal landed him a five-year prison sentence. Instead of filing for divorce, she maintained daily phone calls and provided financial support, all while quietly rekindling a romance with her high school sweetheart. Now, she is living with her new boyfriend and actively trying for a baby, leaving her mother-in-law outraged and her legal marriage completely intact. Want the juicy details? The full story is right below.

Wife Plays House With New Boyfriend While Her Husband Sits in Prison, Now She Wants a Baby

AITA for trying to have a baby with my boyfriend while I’m married?

The foundation of the marriage fractured instantly, yet the legal and emotional tethers remained surprisingly intact behind bars.

I (28F) am married to my husband (29M), but he has been in prison for the last five years of our 7-year marriage because of something he did that completely...

However, it is serious enough that, realistically, I could never bring him back into my family's life even if I wanted to. When he first went to prison, I tried...

I helped him financially and supported him as much as I could, because he didn't have many people in his life besides his mom. And to be honest, at that...

I would say things like, "We're not together," and "I'm not waiting for you. " Yet, we would still giggle and play over the phone calls. Honestly, the relationship improved...

This blurry line between devoted friend and estranged wife set the stage for a collision when a casual fling turned serious.

For example, if I talked to someone casually or went on a date, I never told him. My mindset was that if it was just a fling and wasn't going...

Even though I said we weren't together anymore, I was still emotionally present in his life for a long time. About two years ago, I reconnected with someone I dated...

But at the time, I didn't know how serious it would become. Me and this guy, let's call him Dan, were always very on and off in high school. But...

Next thing I know, I'm at his place every day. I practically live with him. When that happened, my communication with my husband started dropping a lot. It went from...

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I never answered his calls when I was around my boyfriend. At first, it seemed like a thing you don't just casually mention. Then, it felt like I fell headfirst...

I told my husband, not so playfully, that I wanted a divorce, I was now in a relationship, and I was trying to focus on being a good girlfriend, so...

When I had tried gently telling him or easing him into the idea of me moving on, he would laugh it off as if I could never do that to...

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Oh, but before that part, some of his family members kept stirring things up. His cousin and sometimes his mom would, and still do, stalk my Facebook and then report...

Apparently, his cousin told him I was posting pictures with other guys, which resulted in a day of him blowing up my phone while I was actively with my boyfriend...

"We are not together," I said, but I'm bubbly and I'd laugh and smile while saying it. My boyfriend has always known that I'm technically still married. We don't really...

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I told him it was him calling, and we just moved on with our night. My boyfriend and I are now living together and talking about building a future together,...

I feel guilty being much happier building this life with my boyfriend. Oh, the person who is calling me a terrible person over all of this is my mother-in-law. She...

The reason I'm still legally married is honestly just because I haven't dealt with the divorce process yet. Between paperwork, lawyers, and the complications of him being incarcerated, I kept...

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Reading this complex situation, it becomes clear that the dynamic at play here is a classic example of ambiguous loss combined with extreme conflict avoidance. When a spouse is incarcerated, the partner on the outside often experiences a confusing grief where the person is physically gone but psychologically present. By maintaining the emotional benefits of the relationship while verbally denying its existence, the original poster created a deeply confusing environment for everyone involved.

Legal professionals consistently warn about the severe complications of starting a new family while legally bound to an estranged spouse. The presumption of paternity is a legal standard in many jurisdictions which dictates that if a woman gives birth while married, her legal husband is automatically presumed to be the child’s father. Unraveling this requires complex legal filings and paternity tests that can take months or years to resolve.

For the original poster, avoiding the paperwork is creating a far more daunting emotional and legal crisis. The most practical step forward is to halt any family planning until the legal divorce is completely finalized. By establishing clear legal boundaries now, she can protect her new relationship and ensure any future children are not caught in a bureaucratic nightmare. First, consult with a family law attorney immediately to begin the paperwork. Second, establish firm, no-contact boundaries with the estranged husband’s family to prevent further emotional manipulation.

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Community Opinions

Reddit came in hot, nearly unanimous in their judgment, with many readers utterly baffled by the massive legal risks she was actively ignoring.

u/Lighthouse_on_Mars YTA, Get a divorce. Just get the damn divorce, getting a lawyer and serve him divorce papers. It actually super straightforward to divorce someone in prison and happens ALL...

u/roadkill4snacks If you can’t deal with a divorce, what makes you think you can cope being a parent or being a decent partner? If you don’t divorce, will your ex...

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u/Veridical_Perception YTA for not getting a divorce before moving on. You've had 5 years. Why haven't you done it? You're not "technically" married. You're LEGALLY married. There is no technicality...

u/Smitten-kitten83 YTA. In a lot of states a legal husband is automatically listed as the father. Get it together and file for divorce before complicating things with a baby.

u/bmw5986 YTA for trying for a child with someone else when youre still nott divorced. Technically, you arent single, just available.

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u/Whiteroses7252012 YTA. I was married to a guy I couldn’t get divorced from for a while. You know what I didn’t do? Date random people. I focused on myself, my...

u/felifornow YTA So instead of getting a divorce after that very horrible thing he did that you won't tell us for some reason, you met and supported him for years...

u/Mmm_Lychees I stopped reading half way YTA You lack the maturity needed to parent. 

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u/ShelyChelle You are back with someone that you ended a relationship with, trying to have a baby with this person, and married to a man who, and we dont know,...

u/Cookies_2 You need to look at why you’re not divorced yet- the real reason. You still come off as in love and happy with your incarcerated husband. You beat around...

u/Interesting-Luck-312 YTA. You want your cake and to eat it too. If you do not want to be married anymore, then get divorced. File the paperwork and you both sign...

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u/OneTrackLover721 If paperwork and lawyers are too much for you, you shouldn't be having a child. Get a divorce. Grow up. YTA 

u/CompoteEcstatic4709 Please figure out why you are still involved with your incarcerated husband before you remarry and have children. Divorcing someone in jail for 5 years already should be cheap...

u/Imaginary-Snow-3242 Not to mention OP could be playing a very dangerous game on what he might do to her or her current boyfriend when he gets out since she wants...

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u/Satori2025 YTA pure and simple. Get a divorce and grow up before having a baby

A few commenters sternly reminded her that her inaction wasn’t just stringing along her incarcerated husband, but actively endangering her new boyfriend’s future rights as a father.

Navigating the end of a complex marriage is never simple, especially when incarceration and estranged families are heavily involved. While moving on emotionally is a natural step, the legal realities of marriage and paternity simply cannot be ignored or swept under the rug.

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Do you think she was naive to avoid the divorce paperwork for so long, or did her husband’s family overstep by policing her social media? And how would you handle ending a marriage with someone behind bars? Share your hot take below!

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