AITA for inviting my daughter’s ex husband to our Christmas dinner?

Family holidays can turn explosive when divorce and infidelity collide with lingering loyalties. One father, still close to his daughter’s ex-husband Jason—a man he views as kind and wronged—invited him to Christmas dinner after learning Jason would otherwise spend the day alone. The daughter had cheated with a woman, leading to the divorce, and the father strongly disapproves of both the infidelity and her new relationship.

What escalates the conflict is the father’s dismissal of claims that Jason was controlling, plus both daughters’ unified reaction: the younger refused to attend, and the elder canceled in solidarity. Though the father’s wife supports him, he now questions if prioritizing the ex has cost him his daughters.

‘AITA for inviting my daughter’s ex husband to our Christmas dinner?’

The father admired his daughter’s high school sweetheart turned husband until the marriage fell apart.

Remaining close to Jason, the father extended a holiday invitation out of compassion.

Both daughters reacted strongly, leading to canceled holiday plans.

Inviting an ex-spouse to family events post-divorce, especially one involving infidelity, requires extreme sensitivity to the betrayed party’s comfort—in this case, the daughter who ended the marriage through cheating. While the father’s disapproval of her actions is valid, publicly aligning with her ex by hosting him on a major holiday signals conditional love, prioritizing moral judgment over family unity.

Counterarguments might emphasize kindness toward a lonely former son-in-law, yet the daughters’ aligned response—plus reports of controlling behavior and a drunken confrontation—suggests deeper issues the father may have minimized by trusting Jason’s narrative alone. What intensifies the fallout is the perceived “sides” in a divorce where both parties likely share blame.

Societally, parents often struggle with neutrality after adult children’s divorces, but choosing the ex’s presence over potential reconciliation risks long-term estrangement, as many estranged parents later regret favoring moral stands over relationships.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Most users declared the father clearly in the wrong, warning of permanent damage to his daughters’ trust.

Several highlighted potential manipulation by the ex and the father’s selective belief.

A few commenters probed deeper personal triggers while maintaining the judgment.

The community unanimously viewed the father as wrong for inviting his daughter’s ex to Christmas, seeing it as taking sides and risking irreversible family rifts. Many urged him to prioritize his daughters and reconsider Jason’s motives.

Would you ever invite an ex-in-law to a family holiday after a contentious divorce? How do parents best stay neutral when strongly disapproving of an adult child’s choices—what boundaries help preserve relationships?