AITA for comparing my dad to my grandfather (both are cheaters) and saying they’re not that different overall?

A 22-year-old man cut ties with his father after discovering a 27-year affair that started right after the honeymoon. When dad begged for forgiveness but admitted no regrets because he “loved” the affair partner, the son called him out—comparing him directly to his cheating grandfather, saying they’re both selfish at heart.

The siblings softened over time, pushing for reconciliation with “he deserves happiness” excuses, but the son holds firm, seeing no difference in the harm caused. This intense family rift hits hard for anyone who’s watched infidelity shatter trust, questioning loyalty, forgiveness, and generational patterns.

The grandfather’s history was no secret in the family.

The dad’s betrayal echoed it shockingly close.

The confrontation turned raw.

Siblings shifted, pressuring for peace.

Long-term affairs like this devastate trust, often more than short flings, because they involve sustained deception. The dad’s lack of regret—prioritizing his “happiness”—mirrors classic selfishness, echoing the grandfather’s disregard for consequences.

Psychologists note children of cheaters grapple with loyalty conflicts, anger, and fear of repeating patterns. The son’s comparison isn’t cruel; it’s a valid parallel highlighting generational harm without growth. Siblings’ “deserve happiness” view minimizes betrayal’s trauma on mom and kids.

Forgiveness isn’t owed; boundaries protect healing. No-contact or low-contact preserves mental health when remorse lacks. Therapy helps process grief over the “lost” parent ideal. Ultimately, accountability matters—dad’s misery stems from consequences, not cruelty.

See what others had to share with OP:

The crowd overwhelmingly backed the son, slamming dad’s selfishness and siblings’ excuses.

Many called out the parallels and lack of true remorse.

Others questioned siblings’ motives and praised standing firm.

Comparing a long-term cheater to his own infamous father isn’t harsh—it’s accurate when patterns of selfishness repeat without real remorse. Standing firm honors the pain caused, especially to mom. Ever watched infidelity echo through generations? Would you forgive for “happiness,” or hold the line like this?