AITA for pretending to not know who Jesus is? To some guy from work who tried to lecture me at the bar.

A lesbian woman at a work happy hour found herself targeted by a homophobic coworker who tried to lecture her about hiding her sexuality—to avoid offending Jesus Christ. Due to hearing difficulties in a noisy bar and an initial misunderstanding, she repeatedly asked him to clarify who this problematic person was.

What makes the story more complicated is that once the penny dropped, she leaned into the confusion and playfully pretended to be shocked by his “cussing,” turning the tables on the preacher. The encounter ended with him storming off in frustration, leaving her amused but wondering if she went too far by poking the bear.

‘AITA for pretending to not know who Jesus is? To some guy from work who tried to lecture me at the bar.’

At a crowded bar with new coworkers, a man approached her with a warning about being openly gay.

So I have hearing damage in one ear and I sometimes have trouble hearing stuff the first time depending on if they're on the side with my bad ear.

I also started a new job recently and went out for the first time with a bunch of coworkers. After a few drinks, this guy I didn't know came up...

and said something to me that I only half-caught, but I could tell the vibe of it was that someone had a problem with me being gay,

and he'd suggest I don't go saying that I'm gay around work. I figured he was doing me a solid, I am a lesbian in a state that's not too...

and often at a new job someone will pull me aside and warn me who the bigots are at the office. I always appreciate it because honestly that whisper network...

But I didn't really hear the name he said, so I went "Who?" He seemed surprised like the guy was someone I should obviously know, and I was like "Who...

She kept asking for clarification, still believing he was warning her about a bigoted colleague.

I was feeling kinda embarrassed, I honestly am sorta insecure about my hearing, so I didn't want to ask him to repeat himself a fourth time.

ADVERTISEMENT

So I was like hey man I'm sorry but I'm blanking on the name, could he point him out? I was still assuming he meant some coworker at the bar....

And acting mad I didn't know this guy. And I started to get a little frustrated and said "Dude seriously? You're tryna tell me to look out for someone and...

The revelation hit, and she turned his religious lecture into playful outrage over his language.

ADVERTISEMENT

At that point he raised his voice at me, and yelled that it was Jesus Christ. I realized then... He's not trying to warn me of some bigoted f__ker at...

This is where I might really be a d__k - it had finally clicked for me (took me long enough, I know) but at that point I was starting to...

so I just went "Dude, no need to cuss me out for asking!" He said he wasn't cussing me out. I asked "So seriously, who is it?

ADVERTISEMENT

Because you're honestly freaking me out man" and asked several times while he got increasingly frustrated and said "Jesus" to which I went "Language, man!

I'm not talking to you if you keep cussing me out" He got mad and stormed off, and I went back to the table with my coworkers. A few of...

I was like "I dunno, it was so weird? He was talking about how I should hide that I'm gay at work, cause he knew some guy here would have...

ADVERTISEMENT

But he wouldn't tell me what guy - and I hate to say this but I'm starting to think there isn't another guy? My coworkers said I should still tell...

I definitely will if he says anything again" I do feel a little conflicted about that though since past a certain point I was just poking the bear AITA for...

This encounter showcases a clever, low-risk way to deflect workplace homophobia while highlighting the absurdity of using religion to justify prejudice. The initial misunderstanding stemmed from genuine hearing difficulty and a reasonable assumption based on past positive experiences with ally warnings—demonstrating how queer people often navigate safety networks in hostile environments.

ADVERTISEMENT

Once aware of the true intent, the poster’s shift to feigning offense at “cussing” cleverly flipped the script, forcing the coworker to repeatedly invoke the name he wielded as a weapon. What makes the story more complicated is the ethical gray area of prolonging the pretense for amusement, yet it served as non-confrontational resistance that ended the interaction without escalation.

Socially, such incidents reflect ongoing challenges for LGBTQ+ individuals in conservative regions, where subtle (or not-so-subtle) pressure to stay closeted persists. Her handling avoided direct conflict while documenting the behavior for potential HR follow-up, balancing self-protection with sharp-witted pushback. The widespread community approval underscores how humor can disarm bigotry without granting it legitimacy.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Many users celebrated the poster’s quick thinking and found the entire exchange hilarious.

ADVERTISEMENT

SamSpayedPI − NTA I think your response was appropriate—and hilarious! I love how you pretended to be offended by his taking the Lord's name in vain every time he said...

Interesting-Fish6065 − NTA Speaking as a Christian, I find this hilarious. Good for you.

Less-Day5167 − "Jesus? ..... Jesus. .... Aaah yes, I know, he's from that book! Yea, yea, I remember now! He's that kinky gay guy from long ago in the middle...

ADVERTISEMENT

The guy with the male harem of twelve boy-toys and who was so into bdsm he got himself nailed to a cross!

Ad all while being so stoned that he thought he died and came back to life! Hilarious! What a character! That's who you were talking about, right? " NTA.

Kittenn1412 − This is hilarious. I would still tell HR if I were you. NTA.

ADVERTISEMENT

fisheswithherbs902 − NTA. Anyone with that much h__red doesn't know Jesus either.

Several commenters urged her to report the incident to HR while praising her handling.

debdnow − NTA: Even though it was unintentional at the beginning, it was a hilarious and wonderful way to handle him. Yes, go to HR. They probably won't be able...

ADVERTISEMENT

but you will have it on record. Also, document, document, document every time he does or says something inappropriate. Never be alone with him whenever possible.

Motor_Business483 − NTA ​ YOu handled that VERY well. Now report him for his h__ophobic harassment, contaxt HR.

midnight_thorns − Lmao nta but still go to hr.

ADVERTISEMENT

A few added empathy for her hearing struggles or sharp jabs at the coworker’s hypocrisy.

[Reddit User] − Oh my god, as an ex-evangelical Christian turned lesbian that is hilarious! I am totally using that. “Jesus? Does he work in the shipping department or something?...

pudge-thefish − NTA and I kinda love your style. Also I totally get the single sided hearing loss and especially in loud environments it is super hard to understand individuals.

ADVERTISEMENT

The poster skillfully turned an uncomfortable homophobic confrontation into a memorable shutdown, earning widespread approval for both the humor and the boundary-setting. While she worried about “poking the bear,” her playful pretense safely defused the situation and exposed the coworker’s intolerance.

Have you ever used humor or feigned ignorance to deflect bigotry—did it work, or backfire? What’s your go-to strategy when a coworker crosses the line outside work hours? Share your stories and tips below.

ADVERTISEMENT
Share this post

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *