AITAH for divorcing my wife because i like being single more?

Infidelity can shatter a marriage in an instant, but sometimes the real breaking point comes much later. In this case, a 32-year-old husband believed he was doing everything possible to support his family, from working long hours to managing most of the household and childcare responsibilities. When he uncovered his wife’s affair, the betrayal cut deep, yet he still chose to try repairing the relationship.

What followed wasn’t a dramatic explosion, but a slow realization. As the couple attempted to move forward, he found himself questioning whether the marriage still brought him happiness or fulfillment. When he finally asked for a divorce, the reaction from his wife and both families was immediate and harsh, leaving him wondering if choosing his own well-being truly made him the villain in this story.

AITAH for divorcing my wife because i like being single more?

The poster began by explaining why he turned to social media and the basic reality of his marriage.

Anyways so i, 32 M, have been married to my wife, 33 F, for almost 6 years and we have a 3 year old son that it's my entire world...

He then laid out his daily routine, emphasizing how much of the household and childcare he handled himself.

Now, for some context: i work from 6AM to 4PM, i came home around 2 hours before her (she works from 9 to 6) so i start cleaning the house...

during all this i try to include my son and play with him then i normally take a nap until my wife comes home, we eat together and she leaves...

and her girl nights until around 11 PM to 1 AM, during those hours i put my son to bed, cook dinner for me and her, i also cook the...

Wanting to show that the marriage still mattered to him, he described how much effort he put into the relationship.

i also try to be there for her treating her to dates every weekend, saying how much i love her, showering her with gifts etc.

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Everything shifted when he unexpectedly discovered evidence of his wife’s affair.

I always liked this, because i love feeling i do something and making other people happy but around 2-3 months ago i discovered that my wife was having an affair...

i was checking some photos she wanted me to see and i came across a video of the dude railing her, of course this made us argue and afte a...

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and begging i decided to give her another chance and she told me i had a hall pass anytime i wanted

Finally, he explained how using that hall pass changed his perspective and led to his decision.

I'm not proud of it but i used them because i wanted her to feel sad, but this has made me open my eyes. I feel so good when a...

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( i do all the chores daily and when she goes out i go for a walk with my kid SO i have a nice body, just a little chubby...

since she said i was "fat" and that's one of the reasons she cheated, they also say i'm great for doing what i do in the house and how i...

(i tell them that i'm in a open relationship with my wife and a bit about what i do) and i realized how much i liked actually being valued so...

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Now her and both our families are constantly insulting me for what i'm doing, saying that i betrayed her and that i'm going to regret what i do

and i feel guilty because the divorce petition was seemingly out of nowhere, one day we're working in our relationship and the next day i'm asking for divorce. So Reddit...

From a relationship standpoint, the marriage effectively fractured at the moment trust was broken. While some couples do recover from infidelity, reconciliation requires genuine accountability, consistent effort, and mutual respect. In this situation, the poster attempted to move forward, but his emotional needs remained unmet.

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The hall pass became a catalyst rather than a solution. Instead of restoring balance, it exposed how starved he was for appreciation. Feeling valued by others highlighted what he no longer felt at home, making it harder to ignore his dissatisfaction.

According to Dr. John Gottman of The Gottman Institute, “Betrayal doesn’t begin with an affair; it begins when someone feels alone in a relationship.” That sense of emotional isolation often lingers even after apologies, especially when one partner carries most of the emotional and domestic labor.

Practically, choosing divorce doesn’t automatically make someone heartless or selfish. Ending a relationship can be an act of honesty when staying would only deepen resentment. Therapy, clear co-parenting boundaries, and limiting family interference may help him move forward while protecting his child’s stability.

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Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Many users sided with the poster, saying the marriage effectively ended the moment the affair was discovered.

whoyoumei − NTA I think your relationship ended when your wife cheated. I also think that being able to have a "hallpass" helped you realise what it feels like to...

and admired. Her blaming her infidelity on 3kgs is pathetic. Leave her and find someone who will treat you better

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Flaky_Two1872 − Fakest bs troll today.

Fast_Tea_9389 − Haha! Is this some incel fantasy of what a relationship with a woman is?

Rox_xe − YTA for posting such obvious bait. Oh I'm a perfect husband and my wife is cheating, AITA for divorcing?

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nwbrown − YTA for writing this fake crap.

Others took a more critical but measured stance, questioning his choices without excusing the cheating.

Impossible_Gur1031 − Just working out this timeline, with some assumptions: 4pm: finish work 4-6pm: commute home, pick up son from childcare (assuming in childcare), tidy house, cook dinner (for all?...

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play with son, have nap 6pm: Wife arrives home 6-8pm: All eat dinner together, bedtime routine with 3yo son (assuming including bath time and reading), wife leaves for nightime activities?

8pm-12am: cleaning up from dinner, cooking dinner, cooking lunches, assuming clean again, relax, then go to bed at 12am to get up at approx 5am to get to work by...

FirstDukeofAnkh − How short is your commute if you end your work day at the same time you get home? And do you pick the kid up from daycare? Such...

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Solidus27 − YTA for the clickbait and highly misleading title to this post

AdvisorMaleficent979 − Yeah, I call b__lshit on this.

dawgpoundma − I’m still trying to figure out who is watching the 3 year old when dad takes his naps after 4pm every day

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A third wave of commenters dismissed the post entirely, accusing it of being ragebait or fiction.

[Reddit User] − I knew what happened as soon as I read the words "girls nights" and "gym". It's like catnip to this sub. Fake ragebait. Last two paragraphs sealed...

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flappyKitten − This has to be fake. When you have a 3 year old. You can’t just nap and have them wandering in the house alone.

Vegetable-Fix-4702 − You cannot cook, take care of a toddler and nap in a two hour time span. I raised 5 children. Who you trying to kid? One kid alone...

Hyperversal_Shitface − Yeah sad incel bait

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Muted-Move-9360 − How many of these copy/paste rage baits do we have to endure?

This story divided readers because it sits at the intersection of betrayal, personal growth, and disbelief. Some saw a man finally choosing himself after years of imbalance, while others questioned whether the account was even real. Regardless, the debate highlights how infidelity can permanently alter how people view love, effort, and self-worth. When a relationship no longer feels safe or fulfilling, is walking away an act of selfishness, or an act of self-respect? What would you have done in his place?

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