AITA for Being Furious That My Son Is Bullied for Surviving a Car Accident?

After a car accident that killed one friend and paralyzed another, OP’s son—the sole survivor—became a target of relentless bullying at school. Classmates, especially the brothers of the deceased, harass him daily with cruel remarks like “You should have died too.” Despite OP’s pleas to teachers, counselors, and the school board, they dismiss it as “grieving,” refusing to intervene.

Reddit supports OP, urging her to seek legal help, document the bullying, or explore other schools. Is OP wrong for feeling helpless? Let’s dive into the story and the community’s passionate responses to find solutions for this heartbreaking situation.

‘AITA for Being Furious That My Son Is Bullied for Surviving a Car Accident?’

It all began after a tragic car accident:

Last summer my son and two of his were in a car accident. One of them passed away, the other will be paralyzed and have disabilities for the rest of...

When school started is when the harassing and bullying started. Mainly from the brothers of the boy who died. They were relentless but I told my son they would get...

The bullying intensified, impacting OP’s son’s mental health:

I‘ve spoken with the boy's parents, I’ve gone to the teachers, school counselors, principal, deans, and the school board. They all respond with “The boys are grieving and they are...

Losing someone is tragic, the loss of a child is a nightmare. But that doesn't mean they should be able to terrorize my son DAILY. It happens mostly before and...

He hears it every.single.day. I suspect more is going on but he doesn’t want to tell me. I've noticed a huge change in my son. He has lost weight.

He has horrible anxiety. He can’t relax at home because all he can think about is school the next day. I tell him he can take mental health days but...

The school refuses to act, leaving OP helpless:

ADVERTISEMENT

I’ve gone to the school to tell them this is serious and last week before Thanksgiving break I was told that since he hasn’t attempted to take his life or...

I started looking into homeschooling or alternative schools but my son wants to graduate with his class next year, not a GED. The nearest highschool is over 30 minutes away...

Financial barriers prevent a homebound schooling option:

ADVERTISEMENT

His school does offer a “home bound” option that is usually for students who can’t be in school for medical reasons. It is offered to regular students but the parents...

A regular laptop/desktop/chromebook/tablet is not able to be used. It has to be the school issued one. There is no way around this and no exceptions. I’ve tried getting his...

He would be able to do his schooling from home but I also can’t afford to feed him during the school week. He gets free breakfast and lunch at school...

ADVERTISEMENT

I hate that money is the only thing holding him back because I’m so worried about him. I’ve tried saving but every time I get close I need new tires...

He constantly says his cat is his only friend right now. He promises to get all his schooling done and make sure the house is cleaned and dinner is made....

The bullying of OP’s son, with taunts like “You should have died too,” is unacceptable, and the school’s inaction is a failure to protect students. Dr. Dan Olweus, a bullying expert, notes, “Bullying causes lasting psychological harm, especially without intervention” (Bullying at School). OP is right to worry about her son’s mental health, as his weight loss and anxiety are serious red flags requiring immediate action.

ADVERTISEMENT

The school’s excuse of “grieving” to justify bullying is indefensible. Reddit supports OP, suggesting documenting evidence, seeking legal help, or contacting higher education authorities. Her son’s refusal to skip school shows resilience, but it shouldn’t excuse the school’s inaction. The American Psychological Association emphasizes that bullying requires strict monitoring and clear disciplinary measures. OP must keep fighting to protect her son.

OP should document every bullying incident, encouraging her son to note details like time, place, and witnesses. Consulting a lawyer for a restraining order or legal complaint may be necessary. Seeking financial aid from charities or private schools could address the $200 Chromebook barrier. Therapy for her son is critical to address survivor’s guilt and anxiety. The school must face pressure from state education authorities to act.

OP isn’t wrong for feeling helpless, but she must act decisively to protect her son. Bullying isn’t just the victim’s problem; it reflects a failure of the education system. This story highlights the need for early intervention to prevent psychological harm. OP should be proud of her son’s resilience but seek ways to remove him from this toxic environment, whether through homebound schooling or relocation. Connecting with bullying support organizations is a vital next step.

ADVERTISEMENT

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit users supported OP and criticized the school’s inaction:

Medical_Gate_5721 - “If they are attempting to hand wave ‘you should have died’, you need to escalate beyond them. They aren't reasonable and they should probably lose their jobs over...

NotThisAgain234 - “I would see a lawyer and investigate what you would need to do to establish grounds for a restraining order against those kids. Let their parents pay the...

ADVERTISEMENT

Communication from a lawyer might at least get their attention to it as a problem they might see as in their best interests to address. Right now they think there...

shammy_dammy - “Go to the police and start a harassment suit and a RO.”

Some suggested documenting evidence and pressuring the school:

ADVERTISEMENT

zadidoll - “Bullying needs to be stopped. Put into writing if the bullying & harassment does not stop then you’ll get the police involved.”

iwanttobelievv - “I worked for years as an advocate for kids just like your son against public schools. GET EVERYTHING IN WRITING. Give your son a notebook. Tell him to...

Where it happened, who was the bully/bullies, what time and day it was, what happened or what was said, and if there were any witnesses (other students or teachers). It's...

ADVERTISEMENT

Tell him you won't read it if he will just write exactly what happens. If you take this to the school they have to investigate. If they don't, get a...

Get him an IEP if it would help. Put a request in writing to the school, state the ways his education is being affected (he's becoming anxious at the thought...

and that you think special education may benefit him at this point. He won't be pulled from his classes and his good grades cannot be used as an excuse to...

ADVERTISEMENT

But an IEP can give him accommodations like being able to change classes before the bell rings when no one is in the hall, let him leave class to go...

and let him and friends of his choosing eat lunch in a teacher's room of their choosing (the teacher will have to be on board with this since it's their...

You have options that will not cost you a penny. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE READ THIS. Feel free to send me a message with any questions.”

ADVERTISEMENT

ChiSquare1963 - “In addition to following advice of u/Glittering-Nerve-987, contact your state department of education for help. I used to be a school district administrator and we paid attention when...

Some emphasized OP’s son’s mental health:

Halotitan04 - “Please get that poor kid in to at least talk with a therapist. He too is grieving on top of all the rest. Perhaps even some survivors guilt...

ADVERTISEMENT

angel9_writes - “His mental health is as vital as his physical health -- is your son in therapy, because survivors guilt is real and the bullying cannot be helping it....

they will let bullies destroy a person before they do anything stop it. And no one is helping those boys grief by coddling them and allowing them to be bullies....

ADVERTISEMENT

Gudakesa - “NTA. I’m speaking 100% from experience here as a 50 year old adult who was bullied relentlessly in high school to the point of attempting suicide as a...

Contact an attorney and have them send cease and desist orders to the principal, the school board, and anyone else in positions of authority at the school.

Then send additional cease and desist orders to the parents of the bullies, and the bullies themselves. Sue for damages. File for restraining orders. Involve the courts and the police....

ADVERTISEMENT

I wish my parents had taken steps to stop the bullying when I was in high school instead of trying to fix it by pulling me out of that school...

There are times even today that the only reason I am still walking the earth is that there will be no one to care for my cats if I’m gone...

Edit to add NTA…forgot what sub this was lol.”

ADVERTISEMENT

Some offered practical solutions or financial support:

Ruski-Medved - “If $200 is all that is holding you back, I’ll pay the school directly for his needed study material and technology.”

Ok_Copy_8869 - “I would contact private and religious schools in the area and explain the situation. I was in a similar situation growing up,

ADVERTISEMENT

not a driving scenario but a conflict I wasn’t fully at fault and my mom was able to get me into a Lutheran middle school at reduced tuition due to...

brsox2445 - “You need to get him out of that school. If it means moving to another school district, then do it. Move somewhere close to that school.”

Others suggested legal action or recording evidence:

ReverendSpith - “Does your son have a phone? If do, have him pull it out and start recording as soon as the ‘grieving’ kids show up. Even if he can’t...

With three or four of these recordings, take them to the school. If the school still sides with the bullies, take them to the police. Kids can still be arrested...

Realistic_Big7482 - “You should get a lawyer.”

XANDERtheSHEEPDOG - “NTA You need to go to the school board or the district manager. The school is allowing your son to be harassed and bullied because they are too...

OP isn’t wrong for being furious about her son’s relentless bullying, but the school’s inaction has left her in a tough spot. The taunts like “You should have died too” can cause lasting psychological harm, and the school must be held accountable for failing to intervene. Reddit urges legal action and mental health support for OP’s son.

What would you do if your child faced such bullying? Can OP do more to protect her son? Share your thoughts to keep the discussion going!

Share this post

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *