AITA for telling my parents no when they keep asking?

A college senior’s parents repeatedly pressured her to reschedule a hard-won internship to take over caring for her 9-year-old sister. After years of taking on the default babysitting role, the 22-year-old finally drew the line when graduation requirements clashed with family needs. Complicating matters further, she still lives at home to save money and has been babysitting her sister three to four days a week since March.

At the same time, her parents guilt-tripped her by telling her she “wasn’t helping,” ignoring the nights, weekends, and homeschooling during the pandemic she had willingly taken on. What’s more, the internship—just two days a week—was a rare position that fit around her demanding class schedule. This conflict shows how caring for a sibling can transform from an occasional favor into an unpaid obligation that threatens a young person’s future.

‘AITA for telling my parents no when they keep asking?’

The age gap turned the older sister into a built-in helper from day one.

High school freedoms shrank as babysitting duties grew more restrictive.

College commuting kept her at home, and Covid amplified the childcare load.

A rare internship opportunity collided with ongoing babysitting expectations.

Parents sometimes offload childcare onto older siblings without realizing it stunts independence. The mother’s plea to “rework” internship hours reveals entitlement built over years of free labor. What makes the story more complicated is the live-at-home arrangement—free room and board can blur into an unspoken contract for unlimited babysitting.

Opposing views might argue the daughter benefits financially from staying home, so flexibility is fair repayment. Besides, family should pitch in during tough schedules. At the same time, graduation hinges on those 250 hours; jeopardizing them risks delaying her entire launch into adulthood.

Broader data shows “parentified” siblings often face delayed milestones. Child psychologist Dr. Kyle Pruett states, “When older children become surrogate parents, they miss critical developmental tasks of late adolescence” (Yale Parenting Center, 2021). The senior’s firm “no” protects her future while forcing parents to source paid care.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Users overwhelmingly backed the sister, stressing education trumps unpaid nanny duties and parents must step up.

A couple of voices urged caution or compromise, acknowledging family help while warning against total cutoff.

Light-hearted commenters poked fun at the parents’ sudden childcare scramble, keeping the mood breezy.

The college senior held her ground, refusing to jeopardize a crucial internship despite guilt trips from parents accustomed to free babysitting. Her years of help—from high school weekends to pandemic homeschooling—went unacknowledged once graduation needs clashed with family convenience. At the same time, living at home adds financial nuance to the debate.

Would you charge retroactive babysitting fees before moving out? How soon should parents start interviewing actual nannies when the built-in one enrolls in senior year? Where do you draw the line between family favor and unpaid labor?