AITA for neutering my cousin’s dog?

A 30-something individual took in their cousin’s neglected Dobermans, Red and Blacky, after he abandoned them amid personal struggles, only to face family backlash for neutering Red to prevent unwanted puppies. With the cousin unresponsive and the dogs thriving under their care, they prioritized the animals’ health, but their family insists they overstepped by altering a dog that wasn’t legally theirs.

This tale of rescue, responsibility, and family friction dives into the ethics of pet care and standing firm in tough decisions. Was the OP right to neuter Red for the dogs’ well-being, or did they cross a line with their cousin’s property? Let’s break down the drama and see what Reddit had to say!

‘AITA for neutering my cousin’s dog?’

The situation began with a cousin’s failed attempt at raising Dobermans:

So, my cousin decided he wanted to start raising Dobermans. He got a male first let’s call him Red. Since he didn’t have enough space at home, my grandparents kindly...

Later, my cousin was given a female Doberman, Blacky. Around this time, he had a lot going on family responsibilities, financial stress, and not much time for the dogs.

When we visited, I noticed the dogs weren’t in great condition. They looked underfed and had some skin issues. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, so I assumed he...

The OP took responsibility for the dogs:

A while later, my cousin sold Blacky. I couldn’t stand seeing her go through that, so I offered to take her in. When I got her back, she was in...

One day during a walk, she pulled toward a familiar place where Red was being kept. He looked lonely and didn’t seem to get much attention. I’d bring him treats...

A few weeks later, Red was suddenly dropped off at my house. I didn’t mind I loved both dogs but it became clear that my cousin wasn’t coming back for...

The decision to neuter Red sparked conflict:

ADVERTISEMENT

So, I started taking care of both. Red needed some time to recover emotionally, but eventually, both became happy, playful dogs again. Then, nature took its course — Blacky went...

I definitely didn’t want to deal with unexpected puppies. Here’s where I might be the bad guy. I told my family I planned to get Red neutered to prevent any...

They reminded me that Red technically still belonged to my cousin, even though I’d been the one feeding and caring for him. My cousin never came to visit, and he...

ADVERTISEMENT

So, I went ahead and did it. I figured it was better for both dogs’ well-being, and honestly, I’d rather deal with an awkward apology than see more animals end...

The OP provided updates for clarity:

Edit: Blacky needed medical care before she could be safely spayed, and I wanted to make sure she was healthy first. She’s now recovered and scheduled for her own appointment...

ADVERTISEMENT

Update: Everything’s going well! Both dogs are healthy, playful, and finally living their best lives.

This story highlights the moral imperative of prioritizing animal welfare over legal technicalities. The OP’s decision to neuter Red, a dog abandoned by their cousin, was a responsible move to prevent unwanted puppies and protect both dogs’ health, especially given Blacky’s upcoming spay and their cousin’s neglect. By stepping up to care for Red and Blacky, the OP demonstrated a commitment to their well-being that their cousin clearly lacked.

The family’s objection, rooted in Red’s technical ownership, overlooks the cousin’s abandonment and the dogs’ dire condition. Veterinary behaviorist Dr. Karen Overall notes, “Neglected animals often suffer long-term health and behavioral issues, and responsible care includes preventing uncontrolled breeding” (Manual of Clinical Behavioral Medicine for Dogs and Cats). The OP’s choice to neuter Red aligns with ethical pet ownership, reducing risks like overpopulation and health complications from unplanned litters.

ADVERTISEMENT

However, the OP’s unilateral action could have been handled with more communication. While the cousin was unresponsive, documenting repeated attempts to contact him and consulting a lawyer about abandonment laws might have strengthened their position and avoided family tension. The family’s focus on the cousin’s “rights” ignores his failure to provide for the dogs, but a more transparent approach could have mitigated their backlash.

Moving forward, the OP should continue prioritizing the dogs’ care, ensuring Blacky’s spay proceeds as planned. To address family concerns, they could offer to formally adopt both dogs, possibly compensating the cousin minimally to clarify ownership. Registering Red and Blacky under their name would secure their legal responsibility and protect the dogs from being returned to an unfit owner, ensuring their happy, healthy lives continue.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit rallied behind the OP with near-unanimous support, praising their care for the dogs and slamming the cousin’s neglect and backyard breeding. Here’s every comment, grouped by perspective!

ADVERTISEMENT

Most supported the OP’s decision to neuter Red:

Impossible_Smile4113 - “NTA. No offense, but your family is gross. This is exactly what people fear when they hear backyard breeders. A good breeder has well-taken care of animals who...

and often invests more than they receive in time and care on the animals. Just planning on popping out puppies when you get broke is. .. gross. He abandoned Red....

ADVERTISEMENT

Independent_Prior612 - “NTA And honestly? Get her spayed ASAP.”

Radiant_Bee1 - “Hmm, the way I read is that both dogs are in your care. You are feeding, providing water, shelter, and covering vet costs. Essentially, to me, YOU are...

You dont want puppies, and you are choosing to prevent that. I dont see you as the a__hole but your cousin doesn't deserve animals, and he should not get either...

ADVERTISEMENT

Acrobatic_Chef180 - “So, essentially you neutered an abandoned dog. You did the right thing. You should also neuter Blacky if you don’t want puppies.”

Pro_Gamer_Queen21 - “NTA Red’s basically yours now because your dumbass cousin didn’t wanna take care of HIS dogs. So you as the owner are completely within your right to make...

Edit: The amount of people that don’t know the difference between a spay and neuter procedure is so f__king pathetic. Blacky was in rough shape when OP got her. A...

ADVERTISEMENT

A dog who is already in rough shape will have to wait to get other health treatments before being spayed in order for the recovery to go well.

Now a neuter on the other hand is a quick procedure where the testicles (things located on the OUTSIDE of the body) are removed and is quick and easy allowing...

StitchesAngel22 - “NTA They care more about $$ than the poor dogs health. They can kindly F off.”

ADVERTISEMENT

Abystract-ism - “Cousin DUMPED his dog on you and your family is upset you want to neuter? Someone is the AH here but it’s not you!”

kween_of_bees - “I hate your cousin. NTA.”

GlumAsparagus - “NTA Get both dogs neutered and spayed. Getting only Red neutered will not stop the heat cycle for Blacky. She needs to be spayed as well.

ADVERTISEMENT

Send your cousin the same amount of money you payed for Blacky for Red. Then register both dogs under your name. That way he has no claim for Red and...

Brooklyn_Bunny - “Legally idk, but morally NTA because F__K BACKYARD BREEDERS AND ANIMAL ABUSERS!”

Reddit User - “Please also get the female spayed. Your cousin sounds like a dirtbag and if he were actually breeding ethically, he wouldn't be using unhealthy and starving dogs...

ADVERTISEMENT

Some emphasized protecting the dogs from the cousin:

Raesout2play - “NTA for wanting to neuter the dog but why on earth would you give custody back to your cousin? ! He is an animal abuser, I'm sorry i...

ADVERTISEMENT

Please either continue to care for them and love them or surrender them to a shelter but DO NOT give them back to him, he was literally starving them and...

Others criticized the cousin’s breeding plans:

SufficientCow4380 - “This cousin has no business backyard breeding when he can't even take care of the adult dogs. It's not like either dog sounds breeding quality. They should both...

ADVERTISEMENT

LayaElisabeth - “NTA. He can't take care of two dogs, not even the one, and people think he'll raise a litter? NO, just F__k no. .. Do you know what...

Extensive vet checks, vaccinations, proper grooming, so no ticks, parasites, worms or other bs. . NO, your cousin treating (read; neglecting) his own dogs like that, shouldn't even breed with...

Your cousin has no business breeding a litter with possible health issues, because he wouldn't know a vet if he got slapped by one, and you probably don't even know...

ADVERTISEMENT

ericthehoverbee - “I think the loss of income from a neglected and sick Doberman stud would be negligible.”

This dog drama is a stark reminder that animal welfare often trumps family loyalty. The OP’s choice to neuter Red to protect both dogs’ health was a bold stand against neglect, but their family’s defense of the cousin raises questions about priorities. Should the OP keep fighting for Red and Blacky’s future, or bow to family pressure? What’s your take on this furry fiasco? Share your thoughts below!

Share this post

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

One Comment

  1. Animals are consider property. The property was abandoned. That’s the law. All animals are considered property. The cousin left the property for someone else to take care of it. The dogs are considered abandoned by the cousin.