AITA for dumping my boyfriend immediately after her said he owns my company?

OP, a 38-year-old businesswoman, ended her relationship with her 40-year-old boyfriend, Brian, after he repeatedly called her hard-earned company “ours,” despite her clear requests to stop. What started as a promising romance turned sour as Brian became disrespectful, dismissive, and manipulative, culminating in him showcasing her success to his friends. OP exploded, publicly called him out, and dumped him on the spot, but now wonders if she went too far by making a scene. Was her reaction justified or excessive?

This story isn’t just about a breakup it’s about defending personal boundaries and confronting manipulation in relationships. Was OP wrong to stand up for herself? Reddit users dove in with strong support and sharp insights. Let’s unpack the drama.

‘AITA for dumping my boyfriend immediately after her said he owns my company?’

OP shared about her relationship and Brian’s changes:

Brian (M40) and I F38, initiated a relationship after months of flirting. I was super into him, I liked him a lot and I felt like I was getting a...

This took me a hot minute to process because I had feelings for him. He also has a daughter that I care about (F18) and I didn’t want to lose...

I’m a business owner in the innovation space and have been very active with a group in my area. I’m suspecting that Brian got close to me for what he...

Brian’s behavior toward his ex-wife:

He has a very dark relationship with his ex-wife. He claims that she has made his life miserable because she still wants him, whoever, the news that she has a...

He said insulting things about her new guy (they’ve been divorced for at least 5 years). I asked if he knew him, and he didn't even know his name..

Brian’s shift in behavior:

I’d been telling him that I don’t enjoy his jokes. He’s gone from nice and loving to saying degrading things and honestly, I’ve asked him if he’s listening to red...

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All I know is that we have an income gap and that he doesn’t have the tools to improve things for himself. I used to be very open to dating...

The issue with OP’s company:

My company just signed an agreement with a very high profile corporation, and it was announced. Ever since that happened, he’s been calling it “our company”. I’ve told him he...

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Two weeks ago, we had a very long conversation about his changes in personality, the way he treats the relationship and how I feel about it. He begged for a...

The event leading to the breakup:

Fast forward to last night. We were out with his friends when he drove us around the industrial complex where I’m establishing my new office (still painting and getting it...

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I thought he just wanted to see the aircrafts and there is a small local airport close by but he pointed at the side of the complex where my space...

I don’t need to have my career showcased for anyone’s benefit. We stopped for ribs and drinks and he referred to the company as “ours”. I immediately asked “What company?”...

I lost my s__t and told him off and immediately set the record straight. His friends looked embarrassed and confused while he tried to calm me down. I dumped him...

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Aftermath of the breakup:

This morning, I woke up feeling embarrassed. I feel like I made a scene. I have no intention of going back to him or making up but I don’t know...

About me: I built this company from scratch, with lots of trial and errors because I needed more formal education in my field, which I did get with lots of...

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He has tried to create companies on a string of failures. I really hate him, and I’m fed up, but his friend's gf reached out to apologize if she and...

OP’s story highlights a pattern of manipulation and boundary violation in her relationship, as Brian repeatedly claimed ownership of her company despite her clear objections. His behavior—from degrading OP, boasting about her success, to reacting negatively to his ex-wife’s new relationship—suggests he may be seeking control and exploiting OP to boost his own status. OP’s outburst was a justified response to his ongoing disrespect, especially after she gave him a chance to change.

Relationship psychologist Dr. Harriet Lerner emphasizes that setting clear boundaries is essential for maintaining respect in relationships. Brian’s insistence on calling OP’s company “ours” was not just disrespectful but potentially a manipulative attempt to tie himself to her success, especially given his own career struggles. His reaction to being publicly called out—playing the victim—is a common tactic to deflect accountability, as many Reddit users noted.

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OP was not wrong to end the relationship, particularly since Brian disregarded her boundaries. Her embarrassment about making a scene is normal, as societal norms often pressure women to remain agreeable. OP should take pride in standing up for her hard work and independence. Moving forward, she might consider seeking support from friends or a therapist to process post-breakup emotions, especially given her attachment to Brian’s daughter. In future relationships, setting boundaries early and watching for red flags like manipulative behavior or “red pill” rhetoric will help protect her.

Lastly, OP should continue focusing on her career and confidence while remaining cautious of partners who may be drawn to her success rather than her as a person. Maintaining a relationship with Brian’s daughter may be challenging, but she could consider reaching out directly to the daughter (if appropriate) to express care without involving Brian.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Reddit strongly supports OP, labeling Brian as manipulative and exploitative while praising her for defending her boundaries and ending the relationship. Comments fall into three main threads: supporting OP’s actions, criticizing Brian’s manipulative behavior, and explaining why OP shouldn’t feel embarrassed.

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Supporting OP’s actions:

No_Safety_6803 - When you dumped him, did his relationship with your company change? Did he lose an office, title, ownership stake, or paycheck? If not, you didn’t overreact.

You clearly asked him to stop pretending he was part of your company. I bet you paid for the ribs too? He hit the jackpot—a confident, successful partner who buys...

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ratssosad - NTA, this guy had more chances than he deserved. So many red flags: lying about his ex, making you feel less, and taking credit for your hard work....

absentmindedlurking - “[She] said Brian was humiliated and took it really hard.” Yeah, I’m sure he was humiliated in front of his friends, but that’s his own fault.

He was trying to take credit for your work and showboating to his friends about how you two had a company when it was yours. You’re NTA here, don’t feel...

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A20Havoc - NTA. You established a clear, reasonable boundary. He violated it directly in a public setting. You set the record straight and ended the relationship. It’s not your fault...

It was probably part of a plan to “normalize” him acting like part owner—it’s harder to shut down that behavior in public, and if you didn’t, it would’ve emboldened him...

JuJu-Petti - NTA. He embarrassed himself.

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FingerLeft706 - NTA at all! Sounds like a perfectly appropriate reaction. I’m proud of you. It’s painful to watch women get s__t on and try to be nice when people...

You’ve seen it happen to others too. And what do you want them to do? Stand up for themselves! Don’t take the s__t anymore! You did that. You deserve an...

Cost-Clear-Cut474 - You’re not the asshole. Trust your instincts and prioritize your well-being. Keep focusing on your career and personal growth.

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Criticizing Brian’s manipulative behavior:

Separate_Kick3186 - NTA. He squandered his second chance. Stupid games, stupid prizes, etc. I’m leaving this link here. Hope you read it, OP. [Reddit link]

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Magdovus - You’re NTA. Has he actually done anything that contributed towards the company?

BrilliantEmphasis862 - NTA, he is a leech and trying to control you. Your response was just fine.

Any_Time3277 - You go my dude! These are the kind of places where you can make a scene and nobody would judge you. That creepy red pill/gold digger dude can...

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anonymous42F - Brian ACTED humiliated and “took it really hard” because HE WAS PULLING THE VICTIM CARD when his MANIPULATION TACTICS didn’t work on you, OP.

He thought his friends would buy into his manipulations, so he switched gears as soon as you dumped him to SAVE FACE. His friends have likely known him long enough...

which is why the friend’s girlfriend (who probably sees Brian as the misogynist he is) felt the need TO APOLOGIZE for anything she or her boyfriend may have done to...

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fiblesmish - NTA, but it looks like he was the problem in his marriage. Why else would he be so angry about his ex dating after five years that he...

You knew right after sex that his charm was just to get you. Now he felt he had control, he could act like he really is. P/s: Why are you...

Explaining why OP shouldn’t feel embarrassed:

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Top_Put1541 - Brian should be humiliated, and who cares how hard he took the ending he asked for. How he behaved is no different than someone who visits an Apple...

C_beside_the_seaside - I mean, I know the saying goes “behind every successful man is a woman doing the work,” but this takes the p__s in the extreme!

OP’s story is a powerful reminder of the importance of protecting personal boundaries and recognizing manipulation in relationships. OP was right to end things with Brian to safeguard her hard work and independence, but her embarrassment reflects societal pressures to stay agreeable. Can OP move forward with confidence and avoid similar partners in the future? How would you handle this situation? Share your thoughts below!

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