AITAH for cancelling a date because he was 1 hour late?

What do you do when a date disrespects your time? A 23-year-old woman canceled her second date after her 24-year-old suitor showed up an hour late, hungover, with no apology. Past incidents, like him using her money for personal purchases, already strained her patience. This social media story explores the cost of broken trust in early dating.

Her decision sparked lively online debate. Many supported her, citing his disrespect, while others questioned her expectations. The situation raises questions about dealbreakers in relationships. How much leeway should you give a new partner?

‘AITAH for cancelling a date because he was 1 hour late?’

The second date was planned for the beach.

(F23, M24) It was meant to be our second date today, we planned to go to the beach together and he said he’d come pick me up at 2pm. I’m...

His delay led to her canceling the date.

Then at half 3 he asks me if he should come pick me up now. I ended up replying an hour later “i’m at the beach with my dad, i’ll...

EDIT to add: it’s a hangout at my best friends house, he’s friends with these people too) and then he just never messaged me back. Did i exaggerate cancelling the...

The first date revealed troubling patterns.

edit- for those saying i should give him a second chance, here’s why i think the second date was his second chance for our first date we went to see...

I go to the bar to get us drinks and then find out he can’t get the next one or any because he has 0 money (it’s the end of...

We go to his house since my house is a 50€ taxi ride. I ask him for a glass of water, he says he has no water. So we go...

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His actions continued to frustrate her.

The next day we wake up and decide we’ll have a lazy movie day. he wants to get takeout so he orders it on the app but asks me if...

The thing is he added a whole bottle of cider to the order, he knows i don’t like cider and the plan for that day wasn’t to drink. So i...

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We run out of water again so we go back out to buy some, i stay in the car and give him 10€ to get it. He asks me if...

he comes back running to the car saying he’s 0.80€ short, so i give him 1€ like…what did he buy he needs more money?? he comes back with 4 bottles...

and he says “you said buy whatever!” and i was like “yeah i meant something for both of us” anyway we didn’t speak the entire ride home, but i decided...

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he gives me a hug and a kiss and says “you forgot i treated you at the movies” (we went out previously with a group of friends to the cinema...

Idk, some people are gonna tell me I’m stupid for even giving him another chance but I just thought next time he will treat me to dinner or something and...

Because we did have a nice time otherwise and he’s funny, good looking and outgoing. like i kinda liked him at first so i wanted to give it a chance...

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The woman’s cancellation was a response to repeated disrespect. His tardiness, lack of apology, and prior self-centered actions—like buying drinks only for himself with her money—signal a lack of consideration. Early dating sets expectations for mutual respect.

His behavior suggests immaturity or entitlement. Ignoring her feelings risks eroding trust. “Respect for time and boundaries is crucial in new relationships.” — Dr. Terri Orbuch (relationship expert), The Love Doctor, 2022.

Her decision to prioritize self-respect was valid. Open communication could clarify intentions, but his silence after her message suggests disinterest. This situation highlights dealbreakers in dating. How do you decide when to give second chances? The answer lies in consistent respect and accountability.

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Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Social media users strongly supported the woman’s decision. They viewed her date’s actions as red flags, with few suggesting leniency.

Most emphasized his disrespect and unreliability.

Caspian4136 − NTA He wasn't just late, he was over an hour before he even called you, because he was hung over. This isn't a good look for date #2.

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Ambroisie_Cy − NTA But OP, he wasn't 1 hour late. He never showed up! He realised 1 hour after he was supposed to be there that he had made a...

He would have been over 2 hours late if you had been on a date with him. The fact he expected you to wait around all day for him to...

MsBaseball34 − He didn't hear his alarm at 2 in the afternoon? You dodged a bullet.

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2dogslife − If he cannot prioritize you on only the second date, he's not the one. It was rude to leave your hanging like that.

Rypien_37 − NTA. Completely disrespectful of your time and if he can't hear an alarm at 2pm. ...yikes.

Others urged her to raise her standards.

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kvetchup − NTA but have some respect for yourself. Why would you even keep talking to him at this point?

Mbt_Omega − INFO: What sort of future do you see with a guy that gets so utterly obliterated on a Wednesday night that he’s incapacitated until 3pm on a Thursday?...

PerspectiveKookie16 − NTA Don’t give this or him another second of your time.

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Brilliant-Bother-503 − NTA. This is a big red flag. You are better off without him.

Some highlighted his failure to communicate promptly.

jensmith20055002 − People miss their alarms, it happens, people make mistakes, it happens. I would be irate if I got stood up BUT, I would be way more mad at...

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If he said at 3, "Is it too late to salvage the date? Can we reschedule? If you give me 30 minutes, I can race over," I might have given...

Techsupportvictim − You didn’t cancel the date. He canceled it by not being up and there. And worse, he texts you at like 3 o’clock saying “I’m so sorry I...

Then he texts you 30 minutes later saying basically “do you still wanna do this”. Why didn’t he ask you that question in the first text message. Clearly still having...

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KindRaspberry8720 − Nah. I was stood up and left after 40 minutes. He texted me later saying he got too high. You dodged a bullet.

Riker_Omega_Three − If a grown ass man can't get up by noon. ..he's not only not mature enough to be dating, he's a lightweight that can't hold his alcohol Hard...

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This story underscores the importance of respect in early dating. The man’s tardiness and prior thoughtlessness justified her cancellation. His lack of apology and silence afterward suggest disinterest. Setting boundaries early protects self-worth.

How would you handle a date who disrespects your time? What are the dealbreakers in new relationships that signal it’s time to walk away?

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