AITA for wanting to postphone the wedding with my fiance because she tested me with a fake miscarriage?

A man, thrilled about his fiancée Vivian’s pregnancy and their engagement, faced a devastating shock when she staged a fake miscarriage to test his emotional response. Vivian, with her friend Carly’s involvement, orchestrated a scene complete with fake blood and tissue, leading him to believe they had lost their unborn child, only to reveal it as a test of his commitment to fatherhood.

His decision to postpone their wedding until after the baby’s birth and pursue couples counseling sparked backlash from Vivian’s friend Carly, who accused him of forcing Vivian to have a child out of wedlock. The Reddit community strongly supports him, condemning Vivian’s manipulative tactic as cruel and a breach of trust. Was he wrong to demand a delay in the wedding, or was Vivian’s test an unacceptable violation?

‘AITA for wanting to postphone the wedding with my fiance because she tested me with a fake miscarriage?’

The man and Vivian, together for five years, were excited about her unplanned pregnancy:

He discovered Vivian and Carly in distress at home:

He was devastated until the deception was revealed:

He later discussed the incident with Vivian, setting conditions:

The man’s reaction to Vivian’s fake miscarriage reflects profound emotional distress, as the staged loss of their child violated his trust (Gottman’s relationship theory). His decision to postpone the wedding and seek counseling indicates a desire to rebuild, but also a recognition of the severity of the trust violation caused by Vivian’s actions.

Vivian’s test, involving Carly’s participation and recording, suggests manipulative behavior driven by insecurity about his commitment. However, her method was cruel, prioritizing her fears over his emotional well-being, and Carly’s recording raises concerns about external influence or a desire to humiliate him.

This incident could erode the foundation of their relationship, potentially affecting their ability to co-parent effectively. Carly’s subsequent harassment and Vivian’s failure to address it further complicate trust, risking long-term relational damage.

To move forward, the man should insist on couples counseling to address trust issues and Vivian’s decision-making process. He should also set boundaries with Carly, communicating directly with Vivian to exclude her friend’s influence. If Vivian resists accountability, he may need to reconsider the relationship to protect his emotional health and their child’s future.

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit’s buzzing with reactions, from empathy to outrage, over this guy’s drama! The community splits into four clear perspectives: supporting his choice to postpone, slamming Vivian’s actions, tossing in some humor, and offering deep insights.

Many users strongly back his decision to delay the wedding, arguing he’s right to need time to process the betrayal:

Some users harshly criticize Vivian and Carly, calling the fake miscarriage cruel and unacceptable:

A few comments bring humor, using sarcasm to highlight the situation’s absurdity:

Thoughtful comments share psychological insights or personal experiences, urging him to rethink his future:

This distressing incident over a fake miscarriage reveals deep issues of trust and manipulation, as a man’s decision to postpone his wedding after Vivian’s cruel test sparked conflict with her and her friend Carly. The Reddit community supports him, condemning Vivian’s actions as a profound betrayal and urging caution in the relationship.

The situation raises questions about trust and emotional safety in partnerships. Should he proceed with counseling to salvage the relationship, or does this betrayal warrant a permanent end? How should one address such manipulative behavior in a committed relationship?