WIBTAH if I break up with my fiancé because of his past as cheater?

Imagine a sparkling engagement ring, a whirlwind romance, and a love that feels unstoppable—until a bombshell drops. At 25, she’s head over heels for Jamie, her 34-year-old fiancé, until he confesses to cheating on his ex-wife after her miscarriage. His honesty stings, and her trust wavers. When she spots him chatting with his former mistress at a work party, her heart sinks, and doubts creep in like uninvited guests.

This Reddit saga dives into a young woman’s struggle to reconcile her fiancé’s remorseful past with her nagging fears. Despite his kindness and support, the shadow of his betrayal looms large. Readers might wonder: can she trust him, or is she walking into a heartbreak? Let’s unpack this emotional rollercoaster and explore what’s at stake.

‘WIBTAH if I break up with my fiancé because of his past as cheater?’

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Trust is the glue of any engagement, but Jamie’s past has left cracks in this couple’s foundation. His cheating after his ex-wife’s miscarriage paints a troubling picture. Dr. Shirley Glass, a noted psychologist, wrote, “Secrecy is the breeding ground for betrayal” (source). Jamie’s omission of the miscarriage and his friendliness with his former mistress at a work event fuel his fiancée’s unease, signaling unresolved issues.

This story taps into a broader issue: rebuilding trust after infidelity. Research shows 60-75% of couples stay together post-affair, but only with transparency and effort (source). Jamie’s remorse seems genuine, but his lack of full disclosure and workplace proximity to his ex-mistress raise red flags. His fiancée’s gut instincts are valid—trust must be earned.

Couples counseling, as suggested by experts, could help them navigate these doubts. Jamie should proactively limit contact with his coworker and be fully transparent. She needs to voice her fears openly. If trust can’t be rebuilt, stepping back from the engagement may be wise.

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Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit didn’t hold back, serving up a mix of sharp insights and witty jabs. From calling out Jamie’s omissions to questioning his reliability in tough times, the community’s takes are bold and unfiltered.

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These Redditors bring the heat, but are they spotting real red flags or just fanning the flames?

This tale leaves us wrestling with trust, forgiveness, and second chances. Jamie’s past infidelity and half-truths have shaken his fiancée’s confidence, raising questions about his reliability. Can love conquer a tainted history, or is her gut warning her to run? Have you ever faced a partner’s past that made you question your future? Share your stories—what would you do in her shoes?

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One Comment

  1. I am the type of person that believes in second chances..this was a few years ago so he gas had timecto grow up and realize his mistakes…
    Just because he had a mistress thst still works with him doesnt mean he is still intrested in each other
    They probably talk and hang out after work with otber work friends but it doesnt mean he is texting her non stop
    Sometimes we have to take chances and ignore those chatting in your ear..
    Being engaged doesnt mean you have to marry right away..wait a couple of years there is no rush..
    Just because he cheated before doesnt mean he will repeat
    Forgiveness and let it go..love is hard
    Communication is very important