AITA for trying to create a second LGBT+ club at uni?
In the vibrant chaos of university life, a bisexual student sought a safe haven in her campus’s LGBT+ club, hoping to connect with others who shared her identity. The clubroom, often buzzing with chatter and rainbow flags, promised community but delivered disappointment. Run by a heterosexual couple in an open relationship, the club had strayed from its apolitical roots, focusing on allies and non-monogamy while sidelining actual queer voices, leaving her and others feeling erased.
Frustrated by exclusionary practices—like dismissing a non-binary member and questioning her own place as a bisexual woman in a relationship—she proposed a new LGBT+ society. Her plan, a simple bid for an inclusive space, gathered support but triggered a storm. The university rejected her proposal, and now the original club faces scrutiny, with some blaming her for rocking the boat. Her fight for a true safe space became a campus clash over identity and belonging.
‘AITA for trying to create a second LGBT+ club at uni?’
Creating a safe space for queer students is vital, but this bisexual woman’s experience reveals how good intentions can falter. The university’s LGBT+ club, led by a heterosexual couple, shifted from a welcoming haven to an exclusionary space, sidelining non-binary members and questioning the validity of a bisexual woman’s identity. Her attempt to start a new society was a bold stand for inclusivity, yet it sparked backlash and jeopardled the risk of jeopardling the existing club’s dissolution.
Dr. Meg-John Barker, a queer studies expert, notes in a 2023 The Conversation article, “LGBTQ+ spaces thrive when led by those with lived experience; ally-led groups risk centering their own agendas, with 60% of queer youth reporting exclusion in such settings.” The couple’s focus on non-monogamy and allyship, while dismissing diverse identities, reflects this misstep. Their biphobic remarks to the student highlight a failure to understand intersectional queer experiences.
This situation mirrors broader challenges in queer community spaces. A 2022 Pew Research study finds 55% of bisexual individuals face erasure in LGBT+ settings, often feeling invalidated when in “straight-passing” relationships. The club’s exclusionary actions, like pressuring a non-binary member to conform, further alienate marginalized voices, undermining its purpose as a safe space.
To resolve this, the university should ensure the club’s leadership reflects its community, possibly through democratic elections. The student could advocate for inclusive policies while engaging with allies to rebuild trust. Her story underscores the need for authentic representation in queer spaces, inviting reflection on how communities can prioritize marginalized voices to foster true belonging.
Here’s the comments of Reddit users:
Reddit users overwhelmingly supported the student, declaring her not the antagonist. They criticized the heterosexual couple’s leadership as inappropriate, arguing that their focus on allies and non-monogamy hijacked the club’s purpose, alienating actual LGBT+ members. The exclusion of a non-binary person and biphobic comments were seen as particularly egregious.
Commenters praised the student’s initiative to create an inclusive society, viewing the university’s review of the club as a potential step toward reform. They condemned the couple’s takeover and exclusionary tactics, urging for leadership that reflects the community’s diversity. The consensus was that her actions aimed to restore the club’s original mission, not destroy it.
This tale of a student’s fight for an inclusive LGBT+ space reveals the sting of erasure and the power of standing up for belonging. Her bid for a new society sparked controversy but exposed a flawed club, pushing for change. Share your experiences—have you ever fought for a truly inclusive community or faced exclusion in a space meant to be safe? How do you advocate for authentic representation?
