AITA for taking advantage of priority seating on a plane?

Picture a bustling airport gate, where a young student, let’s call them Sam, clutches a boarding pass with a nervous grip. Sam, battling Crohn’s Disease, relies on priority boarding to snag an aisle seat near a restroom—a lifeline for managing their condition during flights. But on a recent trip, a mother’s sharp words cut through the cabin, accusing Sam of “abusing” their privilege. Suddenly, a routine flight feels like a courtroom, with Sam’s invisible illness on trial.

This isn’t just about a seat; it’s about the unseen struggles of living with a chronic condition and the judgment that follows. Sam’s story, shared on Reddit, sparked a wave of support and debate about who deserves accommodations. Let’s board this emotional journey and explore the clash of needs in a crowded world.

‘AITA for taking advantage of priority seating on a plane?’

First and foremost, I have Crohns Disease, I was diagnosed 4 years ago and am still figuring out the best way to manage it. My treatment involves getting 4 hour infusions, every 6 weeks. Unfortunately, because I am a student and my insurance will not permit me to get infusions in the city where I attend school,

I have to fly (sometimes take the greyhound-which takes 9 hours!!) back to my hometown to get medicated, every six weeks (it’s v expensive, but you have to live life somehow) So, in my country there is an extremely popular budget airline, that does NOT have pre-selected seating.

Instead seating works where you are given a letter A-C, and a boarding number, this will be the order in which you board. You receive a boarding number based on what time you checked in. Now, I fly on this service a lot as it has direct from my college city to my hometown and normally am given a pass for priority boarding.

I do this so I can ensure that I have an aisle seat that is not far away from a nearby restroom. The days of me constantly flaring are done, but air travel (combined with naseau from heavy medication) make it likely that, if I need to go to the bathroom, I have to go immediately.

As with my Crohns I have to deal with ulcers/past surgeries in my abdominal area. I will go up to a flight attendant, explain I have an autoimmune disorder, and I’m allowed to board immediately, even before family boarding. Last week, I boarded early, sat in a random aisle seat about 10 aisles back and prepared for the flight.

When everyone else boarded, a mom and her two kids came up to me and she was so angry, she kept telling me that I was abusing my privilege and I shouldn’t have boarded first. I told her that invisible illnesses exist and she scoffed at me

and moved down the aisle to try to find seating. It got me thinking, AITA? Back when I was flaring every 2-3 hours, I really did need the aisle seat. Now it’s really only 1/3 flights that I’m affected. AITA for taking advantage for priority seating?

Sam’s experience underscores the challenge of navigating invisible illnesses in public spaces. Dr. Laurie Santos, a psychology professor, notes, “People often judge based on what they see, dismissing invisible conditions like Crohn’s that require accommodations” (Yale University). Sam’s need for an aisle seat near a restroom is a practical response to their condition, yet the mother’s confrontation reflects a common bias against disabilities that aren’t visible.

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This ties into a broader issue: accessibility for invisible illnesses. A 2023 study from the CDC found that 26% of adults have a disability, with many being invisible, like Crohn’s, which affects 1 in 100 people (CDC). Sam’s priority boarding is a legitimate accommodation, not a perk, especially given their history of flares and medication side effects. The mother’s reaction highlights a lack of awareness about such conditions.

Dr. Santos suggests education as a solution: “Empathy grows when people understand invisible disabilities.” Sam handled the situation well by calmly explaining their needs, but airlines could help by clarifying priority boarding policies to passengers. For others with similar conditions, experts recommend carrying a doctor’s note or disability card to validate accommodations (Crohn’s & Colitis Foundation). Sam should continue using priority boarding without guilt—even a 1/3 chance of needing it justifies the precaution.

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For society, fostering empathy means not assuming entitlement. The mother’s frustration, while understandable, misdirected her anger. Sam’s story reminds us to trust accommodations unless proven otherwise, ensuring everyone’s needs are respected in shared spaces.

See what others had to share with OP:

The Reddit crew took off with a flurry of support, serving up empathy and a few sharp jabs at the mom’s outburst. Here’s the raw scoop from the crowd:

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fartkontrol1 − NTA. She just made you feel like one because since she has kids, she thinks she’s entitled to board first. She’s sadly mistaken. You truly needed that seat.

ameinias − NTA You are who priority boarding is for.

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Dear-Midnight − NTA and she was way out of line. Like, how many seats did she think you were going to take up?

koalanose − As others have said, NTA. I just want to point out that even if you’re only having issues on one out of three flights, that doesn’t make you less deserving of a priority seat by any means. It’s easy to say “well I’m not as bad as I WAS, so do I really need XYZ anymore?” It’s okay to take extra steps to protect yourself and keep yourself comfortable, never feel bad about that!!

Srslycheeky − NTA Why does she think having 2 kids is more serious than your illness? Her kids will be fine, and so will she. I'm sure there were plenty of other places to sit.

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TanzaniaVasquez7 − NTA. That's like judging a person parking in a handicapped section because they can walk. You dont know what their illness or handicap is. Why do people always concern themselves with what others are doing? If there were enough seats to board all that was there,

she should have minded her business. I might add that until you are 100% unaffected on a flight you keep taking an aisle seat and using your privilege. 1/3 of the flight is still extremely uncomfortable for you, so do what you need to do and dont let people guilt you for taking advantage of something meant to help manage your illness.

zoeelynn − NTA - as you said, not all disabilities are visible. You were perfectly within your rights, and handled the situation maturely. Keep on keepin’ on.

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[Reddit User] − Now it’s really only 1/3 flights that I’m affected. Uhhh. If you have a 33% chance of shitting your pants if you can't get to a bathroom quickly, you are the a**hole if you **don't** board earlyand grab a seat close to the bathroom

and risk making everyone in a confined space smell the results for the duration of the flight.. So, so, so NTA. Some moms just gotta make it all about themselves. When I run into one like that, I just assume they're drunk on a combination of lack of sleep and their own self righteousness.

MutedSongbird − NTA. You have a serious health issue and she was an a**hole for probably just assuming you were faking it because bigbrainthonk. I would absolutely be fine with giving up my seat for you.

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RagaMuffinSun − NTA-You have a disability. You have every right to use priority seating if it aids you.

These Redditors rallied behind Sam, but do their takes fully address the nuances of invisible illness? Or are they just fueling the in-flight drama?

Sam’s story is a powerful reminder that not all disabilities are visible, and accommodations aren’t privileges—they’re necessities. The mother’s judgment stung, but Sam’s right to prioritize their health stands firm. Raising awareness about invisible illnesses could prevent such clashes, ensuring empathy soars above assumptions. Have you ever faced judgment for an unseen condition, or witnessed a similar airline dispute? What would you do in Sam’s seat? Share your thoughts below and let’s keep the conversation flying!

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