AITA for asking my partner to give me $650 out of his stimulus?

Jonathan Hours
Comments 0 Comments

Imagine the buzz of a stimulus check hitting the bank, a lifeline in tough times. For 27-year-old Alex, it’s a chance to cover March bills and settle a shared computer purchase with his 23-year-old partner, Jamie. But Jamie’s got other plans—an Amazon cart brimming with $740 of gadgets, from drawing tablets to Fitbits, despite being jobless. When Alex asks for $650 to cover their shared costs, the air turns tense, and accusations fly.

This isn’t just about money—it’s about trust and priorities in a relationship under strain. Alex, shouldering the household income, worries Jamie’s spending spree will leave them strapped next month. Jamie, craving a splurge, feels cornered. Who’s right in this financial face-off? This Reddit story dives into the messy intersection of love and ledger books.

‘AITA for asking my partner to give me $650 out of his stimulus?’

Background: my partner (23M) and I (27M) are arguing over something I feel is very basic. He’s getting his stimulus check tomorrow, as am I, and I let him know I expect $650 out of it. $400 is for our bills for the month of March (it’s $800 and we split 50/50) and the remaining $250 is from where we bought a computer in January on my card, and he agreed to pay me back for half the cost, since the computer is for both of us.

he just quit his job and didn’t go to any of his final shifts so the stimulus will effectively be the only money he has for a while. my SO’s take on the situation is that he should be able to spend the majority of the stimulus on stuff he wants (a drawing tablet, a fitbit, etc.) he has an amazon cart filled with $740 of stuff. i told him that 1)

it’s not very smart to spend that much money when he doesn’t have a job and 2) he should pay me back the money he owes me before buying a bunch of stuff he doesn’t need. he feels that he never gets to spend money on himself and it’s not fair i’m asking him to pay me back for the computer right now.

he agrees on the $400 for bills but doesn’t think that he should have to pay me back for the pc right now OR that he should save any of the money. as mentioned, my income is our only source of money right now. he is applying for jobs but does not have any interviews yet.

my concern is if he spends over $700 right now, next month i’m going to be f**ked on the bills because he didn’t bother thinking about the future. so reddit, AITA for lecturing him on how to spend his stimulus and for expecting to be paid back before he blows a bunch of money on wants?

Money disputes can crack even the sturdiest relationships. Alex’s request for $650 from Jamie’s stimulus check—$400 for bills, $250 for a computer debt—was reasonable, especially with Jamie unemployed. Financial expert Suze Orman advises, “Pay necessities and debts first; fun comes last, especially in crisis” (Suze Orman). Jamie’s $740 Amazon cart, while tempting, ignores their shared responsibilities, putting Alex in a bind.

This clash reflects a broader issue: financial incompatibility. A 2023 Ramsey Solutions study found 54% of couples cite money as a top relationship stressor (Ramsey Solutions). Jamie’s urge to splurge, despite no income, suggests a disconnect in planning. Alex’s frustration is valid, but lecturing may have escalated tensions. Both need clear communication to align goals.

Alex could propose a budget, splitting the stimulus into essentials, debts, and a small “fun” fund for Jamie. For example, “Let’s cover bills, pay the computer, and save $100 for your tablet later.” Long-term, Jamie must prioritize job hunting.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Reddit’s serving up takes hotter than a maxed-out credit card—here’s what they said about Alex and Jamie’s money mess:

ADVERTISEMENT

DarkRogus - NTA - But this should be a BIG RED FLASHING LIGHT regarding how different you view money and your partner views money and potential problems down the road.

rogerwil - NTA. Debts first, then fun.

ADVERTISEMENT

PoseidonsB00ty - NTA at all. That money is actually already spent, and can’t be spent twice without someone left holding the bag (you).

Dr_Asshole_PhD - NTA. Oh honey, run for the hills. There are more red flags here than the world cup. You are obviously not a priority for him in any way shape or form. The fact that he has built an amazon cart with his stimulus money spent shows he has zero intention of paying you back, or that the thought ever even crossed his mind.

ADVERTISEMENT

He obviously has no ability to plan for the future. The fact that he would then manipulate you and turn himself into the victim (I never get to spend money on myself) when confronted about using the money for the CORRECT purpose (the stimulus isn't to buy tablets, it's literally meant for bills and necessities) tells me all I need to know. Get out now!

Wee-bull - NTA - stimulus checks are to keep people going during the pandemic and should be used primarily for cost of living. Not for them to buy stuff they want and expect you to fit the bills.

ADVERTISEMENT

SavageInkStudios - NTA: its common decency to settle your debts before spending fun money. It sucks being the only financially responsibke party in your relationship but you need to stick to your guns and tell him if you cant rely on him to cover his half and pay tou back, you wont be lending/covering his half from here on out.

fakemonalisa - INFO: When you explained next month's bills and his lack of income, what did he say? What was his excuse for wanting to place that burden on you? Also, did he not have savings before he quit his job?

GardenStrange - Run far and fast. I married someone like this and hes been wasting money everyday while i comtemplate bankruptcy.

ADVERTISEMENT

Earz13 - NTA he is. What kind of idoit buys a bunch of useless wants when they dont know if they will have a job or money to cover their bills. Sounds like he is mooching off you.

[Reddit User] - Wow this isn't okay.. First and foremost, get your cards/account link off amazon now. Second, set an expectation that you get paid back for utilities and the computer first. No negotation. Then make sure he understands that he needs to save that money.

Not spend it on tech he doesn't need. (I could justify it if he needed a new laptop to get a job but it doesn't sound like that at all). Third, PLEASE understand that this is very unhealthy financial behavior. Think about how you see this relationship proceeding now you know he would blow through the stimulus check on toys instead of paying off debts.

ADVERTISEMENT

From waving red flags to urging Alex to rethink the relationship, Reddit’s opinions cut deep. But do they balance the books, or just add to the drama?

Alex’s stand for financial responsibility sparked a showdown, revealing cracks in his relationship’s foundation. Was he right to demand the $650, or should he have let Jamie’s stimulus slide? How do you handle money clashes with a partner? Share your stories—have you ever faced a spending spat that tested your bond?

Share this post
ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *