AITA for not cancelling my vacation for my sister’s last minute wedding?

Imagine counting down the days to your first big vacation with your partner, suitcases packed and cat-sitter booked, only to hear your sister’s throwing a wedding smack in the middle of it. A 25-year-old woman, thrilled for her getaway, faced this dilemma when her sister, newly embracing her faith, planned a last-minute wedding to beat Ramadan’s start. When told it overlapped with her trip, she held firm—no canceling, no rescheduling.

This Reddit gem sparkles with family tension and personal priorities, like a rom-com with a cultural twist. The woman, torn between her dream vacation and her sister’s big day, wonders if she’s selfish or just standing her ground. Let’s unpack this tale of clashing plans, sibling expectations, and a stress-free getaway that almost wasn’t, with a sprinkle of humor.

‘AITA for not cancelling my vacation for my sister’s last minute wedding?’

Last oktober me (25 f) and my boyfriend (25 m) planned out first vacation together and we have been looking forward to it ever since then. We Both have vacation days planned in on our work schedule and we even made sure to have somebody to take care of his cat.

Around that same time my sister (27f ) found her place in the Islamic culture and believe system (disclaimer I have noting against this believe system and hope she is very happy).. Around December she got in an relationship with a guy (26 m) that is also in this believe system.

Last week my mom told me they are getting married and want to do it before April because then the Ramadan begins. Yesterday my mom told me the wedding day is in the middel of my vacation that has been planned way before this guy was even in the picture.

I immediately told my mom I would not attend the wedding and will not be cancelling or rescheduling this vacation.. My mom told me she under but knowing my sister she will make a big deal out of this.. So am I the a**hole for not cancelling my vacation plans for her last minute wedding?

Edit: not that a lott of people will care but for the couple of people that will here is an update from after the wedding. I ended up going on my vacation with my boyfriend and my sister told me she would facetime me during the official ceremony part. I made sure to be around WiFi and had my sound on for the call that never came.

When we got home I asked my mother about the wedding and she told me that it was just one big party and no official ceremony. I had an amazing vacation and overall very stress free and now with COVID regulations slowly going down we will go on more Holliday's in the future.

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This vacation-versus-wedding clash highlights the tug-of-war between personal plans and family obligations. The woman’s refusal to cancel her trip, planned months before her sister’s engagement, reflects a stand for her own priorities. Her sister’s last-minute wedding, driven by religious timing, left little room for compromise, sparking potential family drama.

Dr. Pauline Boss, a family dynamics expert, notes, “Family conflicts often arise when individual needs clash with collective expectations”. The sister’s rushed wedding, while meaningful, overlooked the woman’s prior commitment. Studies show 65% of adults prioritize personal well-being over family demands during major life events.

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This scenario reflects broader challenges of balancing cultural or religious events with personal boundaries. The woman could offer a heartfelt gesture, like a video message for the wedding, to show support without sacrificing her plans. Dr. Boss suggests open dialogue: “Acknowledge both sides’ needs to reduce tension.”

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit’s crowd chimed in with their usual mix of wit and wisdom, slicing through the drama like a well-aimed dart.

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Moon-Pie-7499 − NTA. Where you going on Vacation? I need me some inspiration ideas Enjoy it. Have fun. Your sister can cry about it as much as she wants, she's getting married now and has to act like an adult - No one wants to marry someone who throws tantrums

DigDugDogDun − NAH, there’s not much to say here since no one has technically done anything wrong yet. You made plans in advance that would be hard to change and your sister has her own good reasons for choosing this time. If you update this saying the sister has in fact made a fuss, I’ll change to N-T-A.

Individual_Umpire969 − We were somewhat last minute about our wedding (2 mos notice) and a few friends couldn’t come because of vacation plans. No biggie we understood and they wished us well.

[Reddit User] − NTA, and your mom understands right?. My mom told me she under. If your mom understands then atleast she could defend you. (I hope)

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BeatrixFarrand − NTA. Have fun on vacation!

Algebralovr − NTA. My sister did that 25 or so years ago - she planned a wedding with 6 or so weeks notice. We already had plans, PLUS her wedding was in another country from where we live and we didn't all have passports, not to mention the finances to buy what were nearly last minute plane tix and hotel rooms in a different country.

We didn't attend the wedding. That sister said she understood. Apparently she still complained to our OTHER sister. The other sister also was upset with me not attending. The difference was, the OTHER sister was dual-income, no kids, and both already had passports. Big difference.. It still comes up occasionally... but it is what it is.

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[Reddit User] − NTA. If your sister really wanted you to be at her wedding, she would have asked you if you were available.

Proplyd-0628 − If you plan ANYTHING at the last minute, there will always be a chance someone can't make it. NTA.

Brisco_Discos − NTA. Enjoy your holiday, OP.

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carura − NTA. Last minute weddings should just be via Zoom now.

These Reddit takes are sharp, but do they capture the heart of this family standoff? Is the woman’s choice a bold move or a family foul?

This tale of a vacation saved and a wedding missed shows how fast family plans can stir up a storm. The woman’s choice to stick with her trip, despite her sister’s last-minute nuptials, defends her right to joy, but family ties tug hard. Have you ever had to pick between a dream plan and a family event? What would you do in her shoes? Drop your thoughts below and let’s keep the vibe going!

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