AITA for not wanting to get rid of my cat for my girlfriend?

In a cozy apartment filled with the soft hum of daily life, a 12-year-old black cat named Shadow (let’s call her that) lounges quietly, her dark fur blending seamlessly with the rug. Her owner, a devoted pet parent of 11 years, faces a heart-wrenching dilemma. His girlfriend, who recently moved in, is legally blind, seeing only vague shapes, and keeps accidentally kicking Shadow when she’s still. The tension simmers as she demands the cat be rehomed, sparking a clash of loyalty and love.

This story tugs at the heartstrings, pitting a cherished pet against a partner’s needs. The Redditor’s refusal to part with Shadow stirs up questions of compromise, empathy, and the unbreakable bond between a person and their furry companion. Readers can’t help but wonder: how do you balance a relationship with a pet who’s been family for over a decade?

‘AITA for not wanting to get rid of my cat for my girlfriend?’

My girlfriend is legally blind, but can see hazy images. She describes it as being able to see general shapes of stuff, but no details whatsoever. So she can’t see stuff on the TV unless she’s got her face an inch away, and even then she can’t really see it.

She moved in with me a month ago, and there’s been an issue. My cat is entirely black, and blends in when she’s sleeping and still. My girlfriend keeps kicking my cat because she can’t see her even when she’s looking. I’ve tried putting a collar and a bell, but that doesn’t help when she’s sleeping.

I attached a couple white strips of paper to the collar to hopefully make her more obvious but she keeps biting them off(I think? Not sure how she can’t reach them). My girlfriend wants me to get rid of my cat, but she’s 12 years old, and not likely to be adopted by anyone.

And even if she was I don’t want to just get rid of her, I’ve had her for 11 years. My girlfriend is getting mad because she keeps kicking my cat, and I’m not willing to get rid of her.. AITA? Edit: I also tried the light up collar before the bell and paper, but it stressed her out and she wouldn’t sleep.

This tale of a cat caught in a relationship’s crosshairs is a classic clash of priorities. The Redditor’s girlfriend faces real challenges with her vision, but demanding a pet’s removal feels like a leap. Dr. John Bradshaw, an anthrozoologist and author, notes in Cat Sense that “cats form deep emotional bonds with their owners, often providing stability during life changes” . For the Redditor, Shadow isn’t just a pet—she’s a constant through 11 years of life’s ups and downs.

The girlfriend’s frustration is understandable; tripping over a pet can feel like a daily hazard when vision is limited. Yet, her insistence on rehoming a 12-year-old cat, unlikely to find a new home, overlooks the emotional toll on both the Redditor and Shadow. The conflict highlights a broader issue: navigating disabilities in shared spaces. A 2021 study from the American Veterinary Medical Association shows 85% of pet owners consider their animals family, making such requests emotionally charged .

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Compromise is key. The Redditor tried bells and collars, but Shadow’s sneaky nature persists. Experts suggest environmental adjustments, like designated cat beds or high perches, to keep pets out of harm’s way. Dr. Bradshaw advises that “cats adapt to routine changes if given safe spaces,” suggesting a cat tree could help. The girlfriend could also use a cane indoors or shuffle her feet to detect Shadow, reducing accidents without drastic measures.

Ultimately, both parties need empathy. The girlfriend must respect the cat’s role in the Redditor’s life, while he could explore more creative solutions, like neon collars or training Shadow to favor elevated spots. Open communication and small adjustments can prevent this from becoming a dealbreaker, fostering a home where love—for each other and Shadow—thrives.

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Here’s what Redditors had to say:

The Reddit crew didn’t hold back, dishing out a mix of practical tips and spicy takes, like a potluck of opinions with extra sass. Here’s what they had to say:

vodka_philosophy − NTA. The girlfriend would have an easier time finding a new home than the cat. Before it comes to that, try shirts/sweaters on the cat or a wider, brighter colored collar or your girlfriend can try walking more loudly so the cat learns to move when it hears her.

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Jet-Lagged-Lily − NTA, it's your cat, you can't abandon it. You should get a brightly colored collar, possibly with reflective strips. Possibly get your cat a few beds or a cat tree that your girlfriend can avoid? Also, your girlfriend is ridiculous for even asking for you to get rid of it. Either she's never had a pet and just doesn't get it, or she's a jerk.

AngelIslington − NTA. It's your cat, she's old and disability aside, your girlfried must have thought about this before she moved in.. you've had your cat for 11 years,it's cruel to get rid of it now

whyamisoawesome9 − NTA. Have you thought about putting a bell on your girlfriends a**le so the cat can hear her coming? I think that this is something that should have been figured out before the poor cat has been kicked,

and honestly I can't imagine asking someone to part with a pet. There are hi-vis collar options, lights and things that you can investigate to make it easier for your girlfriend to see your cat. Also getting a vet to shave the hair around the cats neck to make the collar more visible.

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ZippyNinjaCat − NTA - Kitty is 12. You've known the cat for a lot longer than the GF. Girlfriend needs to deal.. Can you get a neon collar for the cat? Or even a little neon shirt?

kfarrell197 − NTA. Your cat was there before her and is a member of the family. Can she not get a cane to use around the house to gently reach out to “feel” for the cat? It sounds like she’s not even willing to compromise.

SeptemberJoy − NTA. Am legally blind and owned by cats. It's a completely unreasonable request. Your cat is likely to learn if it keeps happening. Your girlfriend can also step lightly to avoid injury to your cat. Keep the cat and give your gf a reality check. The world doesn't revolve around her just because she can't see it properly.

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XxTaigo − Your gf is being unfair. You’ve had this cat for so long, and it means a lot to you. No one can expect you to get rid of your beloved pet because its an inconvenience for them.. NTA.

catsaway9 − NTA. Maybe get a cat tree and encourage your cat to sleep there by feeding treats there. Or put out a box or two with a towel or cushion inside. Cats love boxes. Anything to get the cat of f the floor or somehow protected from being stepped on or kicked

Or, your gf could shuffle her feet along the floor when walking in your apartment, so she'd feel the cat before she actually kicked it or stepped on it. Your gf is TA for even asking you to get rid of your cat. Cats are family,

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and one that old would never get a new home. If it were me, I'd feel terrible about kicking the cat, even if it were by mistake, and I would find a way to avoid it rather than blaming the cat.

terra_terror − NTA. Your cat is your family, she can sleep in another room if she has to. Also, I’ve never heard of a blind person with a problem like this. Can’t she just not kick? What’s going on exactly?

These Redditors rallied behind the cat, with some shading the girlfriend’s ultimatum as heartless. Others offered clever fixes, from neon collars to cat trees. But do these hot takes capture the full picture, or are they just fanning the drama? One thing’s clear: Shadow’s got a fanbase, and this debate’s got claws.

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This story shows how pets can complicate relationships, especially when unique challenges like vision impairment come into play. The Redditor’s loyalty to Shadow is a testament to the deep bonds we form with our animals, but it also raises questions about compromise in love. Practical solutions exist, but it takes both partners to make them work. What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

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