AITA for telling my brother I don’t want him and his kids in my house any more?

Imagine a home filled with the soft rustle of scales and the curious scamper of small mammals, a sanctuary for exotic pets meticulously cared for by a 23-year-old reptile enthusiast. His haven, though, turns chaotic when his brother’s kids barrel in, treating cages like playgrounds and leaving a trail of stress for his beloved animals. One heart-stopping moment—a tegu’s dropped tail—pushes him to draw a hard line, banning his brother and nephews from his home.

This Reddit post lays bare a clash of family expectations and personal boundaries. The poster’s love for his pets, especially his intelligent tegu, collides with his brother’s lax parenting, sparking a family feud. With a hefty vet bill looming and his mother dismissing his pet as “just a lizard,” Reddit weighs in: is he the jerk for prioritizing his scaly companions? Let’s dive into this tale of loyalty, responsibility, and reptilian respect.

‘AITA for telling my brother I don’t want him and his kids in my house any more?’

I have exotic pets, large reptiles and small mammals. His kids come over and start going in cages and leaving them unlocked and They gave me a scare trying to find my pets they released. I told him he needs to leep a better eye on them or Im going to ban them from my house.

Today they caused my tegu to drop his tail.. which is extremely hard to do they don’t drop it as easily as your random house gecko it takes a lot of trauma So I kicked them and my brother out and said they aren’t welcome back until they learn to respect me and my animals.

My mom called me and said Im being a massive p**ck it’s “just a lizard” she actually called him a snake but.. First off I’m expecting around a $600 vet bill from this as I have to get him x-rayed to make sure it dropped in a way that didn’t harm him and if you know anything about tegus you know they have the intellect of a 3-5 year old child.

Second this isn’t the first time they were warned. Third my brother told me to just buy locks for my cages, It’s not my responsibility to pay to have my cages locked and i don’t want the additional hassle of having to lock and unlock cages twice a day and some cages don’t even have a way to install a lock. Me-23M brother 32M his kids 10F and 8M. AITA.

When a tegu drops its tail, it’s not just a lizard losing a limb—it’s a red flag of serious stress, and this Reddit user’s reaction shows a fierce commitment to his pets’ well-being. His brother’s kids, aged 8 and 10, ignored repeated warnings, turning his home into a danger zone for his exotic animals. The brother’s suggestion to “just buy locks” shifts the burden onto the poster, ignoring the real issue: a lack of parental supervision and respect for boundaries.

This situation highlights a broader issue: respecting others’ spaces and responsibilities. A 2023 ASPCA report notes that 6.3 million pets enter U.S. shelters annually, often due to owners unprepared for their care needs (Source). Exotic pets like tegus, with complex needs, amplify this responsibility. The poster’s frustration is valid—his home isn’t a petting zoo, and his brother’s failure to control his kids risks harm to animals and children alike.

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Dr. Laurie Hess, a veterinarian specializing in exotic animals, states, “Reptiles like tegus require specific environments and handling; mishandling can cause severe stress or injury” (Source). Here, the kids’ actions caused trauma, potentially costing $600 in vet bills. Hess’s insight underscores the need for respect and education when interacting with such pets.

For solutions, the poster could set firm boundaries, like requiring his brother to actively supervise his kids or face a permanent ban. Sending an invoice for the vet bill, as Reddit suggests, reinforces accountability. Resources like the Humane Society (Source) offer tips on teaching kids pet respect.

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These are the responses from Reddit users:

Reddit brought the heat, dishing out support and sharp takes with their usual flair. Here’s what they had to say:

Current-Read − NTA, my 10F kid knows to respect people's animals and their things these kids are old enough to understand respect.

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[Reddit User] − NTA, I used to volunteer at a zoo and it took roughly 5 minutes (or less) to teach a room of 20 5 year olds how to respect and be gentle with the animals. They're perfectly capable of being careful, they just realize that there will be zero consequences no matter what they do.

antipatico_6 − NTA. Reptile lover here, when you said your tegu dropped his tail I was done, too. Keep your scaly babies safe, you don't have to make special considerations (like locks) because your brother thinks it's his children's god-given right to come over, threaten your animals, and inconvenience you.

beavis90909 − Third my brother told me to just buy locks for my cages.... 'I got one big lock for *all* my cages at my front door. Get out.'

crapatthethriftstore − NTA. Why are the kids even touching your stuff without asking?? Your house your rules. That’s the way it goes. Sounds like your brothers kids are jerks and your brother needs to work on his parenting skills. You absolutely did the right thing here.

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CrypticBogBadger − NTA. Ignore your mother. Sue your brother for the vet bill. This poor tegu. I sincerely hope he's okay and they didn't hurt him too terribly. I hate to say this, but I get the feeling your tegu is actually smarter than the rest of your family.

You have warned them. Your brother refused to be a parent so this is on him. He owes you the vet bill. Furthermore, those children are old enough to understand that animals are not toys and need to be treated gently.

Sue your brother for the vet bill, don't let them come over, and consider cutting off your family. They don't have any respect for your reptiles or your rules and don't deserve to be in your life.

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disabledanddramatic − NTA, you asked him to keep a better eye on them. His children need to learn more respect for the items of others, animals or not. He’s not helping his kids by failing to teach them responsibility and respect for others.

perhapsnew − NTA. Send your brother an invoice for $600 (or whatever final number is) and demand that he pays. An 8 year old kid can understand what 'no' means. It seems that your brother didn't make sure his kids understand what they can and cannot do at your house.

CoffeeCat77 − F**k no, you’re NTA.. These kids are 8 and 10? That’s wayyyy old enough to know better.

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milee30 − NTA. If your brother won't supervise his kids and they're not well enough behaved to leave your exotic animals alone, it's better for the animals, you and frankly the kids if they aren't allowed over. I'm surprised nobody's concerned about the kids getting hurt if they're messing with things like a Tegu.

From slamming the brother’s parenting to suggesting a lawsuit for the vet bill, these comments are a fiery mix. But do they nail the heart of this pet-versus-family drama, or are they just cheering from the sidelines?

This story claws at the tension between family obligations and personal priorities. The poster’s ban on his brother and nephews isn’t just about a dropped tail—it’s about defending his sanctuary and demanding respect for his responsibilities. His mother’s dismissal and his brother’s deflection only deepen the rift. How would you handle family who disregard your boundaries and endanger what you cherish? Share your thoughts—what’s the line between welcoming family and protecting your space?

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