AITA for bring pissed that my husband and SIL sold my new camera?

In a cozy suburban home bustling with a baby, two dogs, and temporary houseguests, one woman’s small escape—a vintage camera sparking her old photography passion—became the center of a marital storm. She’d stroll through the antique mall, her infant in tow, dreaming of capturing life’s fleeting moments again. But when her husband and sister-in-law secretly sold her prized find for dispensary cash, her excitement turned to fury, leaving her questioning her place in her own home.

The betrayal stung deeply, not just for the loss of a cherished item but for the dismissive claim that, as a stay-at-home mom, she had no right to her own possessions. Readers can feel her simmering frustration—how could a partner prioritize weed over her joy? This tale of disrespect and financial control unfolds with raw emotion, inviting us to explore the boundaries of partnership and personal worth.

‘AITA for bring pissed that my husband and SIL sold my new camera?’

Background might be relevant: husband and I have his sister staying with us right now, along with her partner “Allie.” We also have a baby and two dogs. Well as I mentioned above, we have a very full house right now and it’s stressing me. I’ve been putting my son in the stroller and walking around our local antique mall to get away from the drama.

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Two weeks ago, I found a nice vintage camera with film. I bought it hoping to rekindle my photography hobby that went by the wayside when my son was born. When I brought it home, SIL and Allie were immediately looking it up online to see how much it’s worth.

Apparently a pretty penny, but but I want to keep it for my hobby and because it’s a unique thing to have. Well, last week my husband, SIL, and Allie were headed to the dispensary in a nearby town. I don’t like weed and don’t smoke due to b**ast feeding.

While they were gone I went in our laundry room to grab my camera from a storage box and it was gone. I called y husband in a panic and he eventually admitted that he’d sold it on FB marketplace. I was furious and asked why, and he said he needed money for that dispensary.

He pointed out that I’m a SAHM and the money I used to buy the camera was his, so he had every right to sell. It made me sad and honestly pissed— I was really looking forward to using it. I didn’t really argue with husband, but I went to stay with my parents for two days. I’m back now but he’s icing me out. AITA?

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Selling a partner’s beloved possession without consent? That’s a bold move, and not the good kind. This story highlights a classic clash of respect and control in marriage, especially when one partner stays home. The wife’s hurt isn’t just about a camera—it’s about her autonomy being dismissed. Her husband’s claim that the money is “his” reeks of financial control, a dynamic that can strain even the strongest bonds.

This situation reflects a broader issue: financial abuse in relationships. According to a 2021 study by the National Domestic Violence Hotline, 99% of domestic violence cases involve some form of financial control (source: thehotline.org). When one partner dictates spending or undermines the other’s contributions—like the unpaid labor of a SAHM—it erodes trust. Dr. Ellen J. McBride, a marriage counselor, notes, “Mutual respect in finances is non-negotiable; dismissing a partner’s role, paid or not, breeds resentment” (source: Psychology Today).

Dr. McBride’s insight cuts to the core: the husband’s actions signal a lack of partnership. By selling the camera, he prioritized his wants over her needs, ignoring her role as a SAHM, which studies value at $184,820 annually in unpaid labor (source: Salary.com). The wife’s temporary retreat to her parents’ shows self-preservation, but the husband’s “icing out” suggests deeper issues.

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For solutions, communication is key. The wife could propose a joint budget to clarify shared finances, ensuring her contributions are valued. Couples counseling could help unpack the husband’s mindset and rebuild trust. If the behavior persists, she might consider longer-term separation to protect her emotional well-being. Respect, after all, isn’t optional—it’s the foundation of any partnership.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit’s got some spicy takes, and they’re not holding back! Here’s what the community had to say about this camera caper:

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curiousbelgian − NTA!!! He sold your camera for drugs??? He says you have no property that is not his??? Huge red flags here. You may want to spend some more time with your parents.

ShallowLikeUs − NTA, it’s not “his” money. It’s joint money. Being a SAHM doesn’t mean you don’t work. You take care of your child and keep the house. Holding money over your head like that is s**tty and frankly wrong.

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If you’re married, then you’re partners. And that includes your financials. He sold your camera that you bought to do something you can enjoy for d**g money.. ETA: If it were me, I’d take the kid and stay with your parents longer.

therealgundambael − NTA. Tell him if he's so concerned about 'his' money, he can use it to hire someone to nanny and do all the housework that you'd normally be doing, see what he thinks about the hourly rates for those services.. You're his wife, not his slave.

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Rhewin − NTA. First off it was yours, not his. The whole trick about you being a SAHM is just some n**ty manipulative BS. Maybe stay with mom for a while.

jadepumpkin1984 − Nta. But honestly if my spouse sold something of mine without my permission to buy drugs....well I'd leave his ass. S**ew him

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[Reddit User] − Whoa, what? Just because you’re a SAHM does not mean you have no possessions of your own because he is the one who earns the money, and any court would also see it that way if you divorced. He is using that as an excuse because he knows what he has done is wrong but he wants you to feel guilty about spending money.

The way he is acting now “icing you out” is setting up future scenarios so he can repeat this behavior again. He is TA. You are not in any way shape or form, believe me. I think your gut will tell you the same also as your initial instinct did.. NTA

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Tombul-Kus − NTA. You know who steals and sells other people’s posessions for d**g money? D**g addicts. He is a lying thief who sees you as his slave. Leave him, now, before he does worse things. Go back to your parents.

QueenDemonic − Holy mushroom. NTA. How dare he say that because you're home RAISING HIS CHILD, you have no right to have nice things for yourself. I would go back to your mothers and stay there until he apologizes.

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Hell, I'd divorce over that s**t. Its borderline financial abuse. Yes he makes the money, but you are his partner! Not some permanent and free babysitter! I'm pissed off reading this. Selling it so he can buy some weed. F**king ridiculous.

virtualchoirboy − NTA and you REALLY need to go spend some time over on JustNoSO. I'm a husband whose wife is a SAHM and I completely disagree with his attitude. How he can possibly think it's fair that you work 168 hours a week\* and he works, at best, less than half of that simply boggles the mind. He owes you a camera.

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I say stay at home moms work every hour of every day. Rare is the husband who will get up with a sick or needy child in the middle of the night. It's often mom that has to calm them down and get them back to bed 'because daddy has to work in the morning'.

MotherofJackals − NTA. Let's break it down like this.. -You have a hobby you enjoy but money is tight. -You find an item to enjoy that hobby that is not only unique but you get a great deal on it.. -Your husband and his sister sell it to buy drugs. When you have an issue with that he tells you that you have no rights to anything because you don't earn money.

Seriously read that. You are not allowed anything unless he approves? He reserves the right to take anything from you at anytime because everything is owned by him? Honey I lived this life GTFO and stop wasting your life on someone who doesn't treat you with any respect.

These opinions are fiery, but do they capture the full picture? Or is Reddit just fanning the flames of drama?

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This tale of a sold camera and a dismissed SAHM shines a light on the delicate balance of respect and partnership in marriage. It’s a reminder that contributions—paid or unpaid—deserve equal weight. What would you do if your partner sold your prized possession for their own gain? Would you confront them, walk away, or find a middle ground? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s get this discussion rolling!

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