AITA for laughing at my wife’s name choice for our son?

In a warm bedroom glow, a couple’s excitement for their first child soured when the husband laughed at “Bartholomew,” his wife’s chosen name. The gift box, tied with ribbons, revealed her heartfelt tribute, but his chuckles sparked tears and tension.

This Reddit saga pulls readers into a clash of love and laughter. Can a name tied to family legacy bridge the gap, or is it a recipe for regret? Let’s dive into this naming drama.

‘AITA for laughing at my wife’s name choice for our son?’

I decided to make a new account because I’m currently being bashed by most of my family members on this and they follow me on my main Reddit account. So my (35M) wife (32F) is pregnant. She’s due in 2 weeks and i am beyond excited because this would be my first child and I’ve always wanted to be a dad.

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Yesterday, we were in bed together, talking about our baby. All of a sudden she jumps up excited with a huge smile on her face. She told me to stay on the bed because she had a surprise for me. She went into our closet and grabbed a box. It was decorated with ribbons and bows so I assumed it was a gift for me.

She handed it to me with the same big grin on her face. It was obvious she was excited to see me reaction. I asked her what it was but she just kept on saying “open it open it!” I opened it and inside was a blue onesie with the name “bartholomew” in cursive stitched on the middle.

Now, I had agreed that I’d let my wife name the baby since she was the one giving birth and I felt as if it would be something really special for her so I trusted she’d name my son something at least normal. I asked her what it meant and she said “surprise!! That’s going to be his name.” She sounded so happy and enthusiastic so I knew she was serious. 

busted out laughing to the point of tears. I honestly could not believe she was going to name our son that. What the hell kind of name is “bartholomew”???? She got really silent and started tearing up. When I noticed this, I sat up and stopped laughing. She snatched the box off me and stomped back to the closet.

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I asked her if she was serious and she said yes. Apparently she’s decided to name our son after her grandfather who she was very close with before he died. I told her that she should think about this because it’s an “outdated” name. She started yelling at me saying I was judging my son before he even came out the womb.

She stormed out and is now staying at her moms. I honestly can’t believe she’s serious. Her dad called me yelling at me because apparently she’s told on me. I’ve been called immature and a joke so far. I’ll probably just apologize but there is no way in hell I’m calling my son by that outrageous name. I’m currently thinking of a nickname to call him, any ideas? AITA?

Naming a baby can turn joy into a battlefield. The husband’s laughter at “Bartholomew” crushed his wife’s tribute to her grandfather, while his concern about its outdated ring holds some weight. Both perspectives clash over love and practicality.

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Dr. Laura Markham, a parenting expert, says, “Names carry emotional weight, often tied to family legacy or personal identity. Dismissing a partner’s choice can feel like rejecting their values.” The wife’s choice reflects deep sentiment, but the husband worries about social fit.

A 2020 study found 68% of couples argue over baby names, often due to differing values. Compromise, like using Bartholomew as a middle name or nickname like Bart, could ease tension. Dr. Markham advises, “Validate feelings, then discuss calmly.”

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Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Reddit’s crowd brought humor and heat to this debate. Here’s what they said:

Beck2010 − That’s what Perry the Platypus was originally named by Phineas and Ferb!!! NTA. Names need to be 2 yeses. She may be carrying the baby, but she doesn’t get carte blanche in naming him.

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[Reddit User] − NAH. Both partners need to come up with the name for the baby together. This is a decision that requires TWO yesses, not something where one person can just pick because it's really unfair to have one person love the name and the other person detest what their child is called. I think the idea of honoring her grandfather with Bartholomew is lovely, but perhaps you should do so as a middle name.

Pick out a first name that is more commonly used now for his first name, and that way the gesture is still there, but without the spelling headaches for the kid's entire life (trust me, he does not want to be named something weird that he has to spell out three times every time he calls to make an appointment for everything for the rest of his life.)

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OkraOk1769 − Am I the only one who thinks Bart is going to be a fine name? In a classroom with 20 Liams, be the Bart.. Maybe I’m biased because I find most of the current popular baby names atrocious.

Nemesis0408 − YTA. Bartholomew is not my personal style, but it has history, substance and meaning, especially for your wife. Better than yet another tired, dated defunct-medieval-occupational-surname as a first name.

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And it’s one thing to diplomatically express your dislike, but you had this poor woman in tears. Both parents should be comfortable with their child’s name, but there’s no need to belittle or mock her. You say you thought it was a joke but you must have known it was her grandfather’s name.. You owe her an apology. Bartholomew is a fine name.

UltraTheMemer − YTA. Even if its a ridiculous name, you said yourself that you gave her the choice to name your son as she is the one giving birth. You also said yourself that she looked very happy and excited, and then you start laughing? Thats some a**hole behavior.

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Ghitit − Everyone is going to associate him with Bart Simpson.. NTA. You responded in the moment. You weren't mocking her choice you were baffled by her (ridiculous) choice.. The she went and told her family, (and they call YOU immature!). You weren't judging your son, you're judging her choice of a name.. Just make sure he has a solid middle name that you can call him.

Pancake_Bandit1 − Sorry to all the Bartholomew's reading this

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[Reddit User] − 'Now, I had agreed I'd let my wife name the baby...'. YTA. Simple as that. You trusted her, she chose a name, and you laughed at the idea and called it outdated. On top of telling her to reconsider. The name was personal to her. By virtue of you mocking the name, you mock the memories she had with someone who was dearly close to her.. Sorry bud, you were being an AH here 🤷‍♂️

FinderOfPaths12 − I don't think your response was the most sensitive or appropriate, so it's a very mild YTA for choosing to laugh at your wife. However, it's very important that both parents consider the impact a name is going to have on their child.

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A name like Bartholomew, while not entirely weird, is dated and could result in bullying. Should we all be named 'safe' names to ensure nobody is ever mocked for their name? That doesn't make sense either. This is the kind of thing that the parents should have a serious discussion about.

Ok-Context1168 − LMAO! I literally laughed out loud at this and would've unfortunately done the same thing when I opened the box. I def would have thought she was joking. Glad you stopped when you realized she was dead serious. I'd give her time because she's obviously hormonal and emotional. Just call him Bart.. NTA

From defending the husband’s shock to slamming his insensitivity, these takes spark curiosity—do they mirror real-world views or just Reddit’s flair?

This naming misstep shows how fast joy can flip to hurt. “Bartholomew” carries love but risks ridicule. Should the husband embrace it or push for compromise? What would you do in this emotional tug-of-war? Share your thoughts below!

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