[UPDATE] AITAH my parents kicked me out without warning.

A suburban street, once home, now feels like a warzone for a 21-year-old man. Weeks after his parents tossed his belongings on the curb over a car crash his father caused, a phone call from his dad offered a half-hearted apology, while his mother’s venomous words—calling him a “mistake”—cut deeper than eviction. Caught between anger and heartbreak, he’s left questioning his place in the family.

This Reddit update screeches into a raw tale of parental betrayal and fractured bonds. It’s a soul-shaking story that begs: when parents wound you with words and actions, how do you find your footing?

For those who want to read the previous part: Original post, Progress

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‘[UPDATE] AITAH my parents kicked me out without warning.’

Some things have happened since my last post. I calmed down a bit and decided to finally answer one of my dad’s calls. He started talking about how afraid he was that I was never going to talk to them again. Then he said that things weren’t supposed to go that way the other day and apologized for Mom putting my stuff outside.

Apparently the plan was to talk to me about it first but he said Mom got caught up in her emotions. When I asked why he didn’t step in, he said it was because he didn’t want to upset her anymore. I didn’t really want to accept that excuse but I took it so we could move forward.

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That was until I got another call from my brother. Mom’s been absolutely s**t talking me to him and my sister. Apparently she kept comparing me to them and how good their doing (mind you their both older than me by several years). Then she went on a rant about how much harder it’s been to raise me compared to them.

At one point he says she even insinuated that I was a mistake. Though he says to take that with a grain of salt as she didn’t outright say it. My brother was uncomfortable with listening to her talk about me so harshly and he decided to call and tell me. I’m feeling a mix of emotions about all this right now.

Part of me is still mad about the whole suddenly kicking me out thing. But I’m mostly just sad about it all. Knowing that my mom is saying all this stuff behind my back only makes me think she really means it. And whether she outright said it or not, hearing that she thinks I’m a mistake honestly crushed my soul. I don’t understand why still but I guess she has her reasons.

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I don’t really want to talk to her again, but I do really want to know the truth of why she feels this way about me. I’m not sure about Dad yet. I’m not the type to cut people off and having to do it to one person is already too much for me.

I’m still staying with my friend as of now until I figure out what I’m doing. I guess I’ll see how it goes from here. Tl;dr: My dad called and apologized. My mom told my siblings I was a mistake while s**t talking me. I’m still trying to figure things out.

The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

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Words can wound as deeply as actions, and this mother’s claim that her son was a “mistake” is a verbal dagger. Her relentless criticism, paired with the father’s spineless apology for the eviction, paints a picture of a family dodging accountability while lashing out. The son’s mix of anger and sadness reflects the pain of parental rejection, amplified by his mother’s betrayal behind his back.

Parental estrangement affects over 25% of U.S. adults, per a 2020 study by Cornell University, often stemming from unresolved conflicts or toxic dynamics. Dr. John Gottman, a family therapist, says, “Healthy families repair ruptures with empathy, not excuses.” The father’s failure to challenge his wife’s actions and words enables her cruelty, leaving the son emotionally stranded.

The mother’s comparison of her children suggests deeper resentment, possibly projecting personal frustrations onto her son. He could seek clarity through a direct, calm conversation with her, but only with boundaries to protect his mental health. For now, leaning on supportive friends and limiting contact may help him heal.

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Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Reddit’s rolling in with takes hotter than a summer bonfire! The community dives in with empathy, outrage, and some sharp advice:

MarshallCook − Your dad is spineless, his apology is h**low, and if his wife told him to stop communicating with you, have 0 doubt he'd roll over and show his belly. Your post history shows the kind of people they are and how little they want to hold themselves accountable.

Difficult_Bed7176 − NTA this really broke my heart to read…no one deserves to hear that kinda stuff from their own mom. Don’t blame yourself, sometimes ppl project their pain the ugliest ways, sending you so much love rn

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bitty20 − NTA and OP I am so sorry you are going through this. I'm a parent and I would NEVER say my children owed me things because I raised them. That's expected of a parent.. Both your mother and father are TA. Mom - obvious reasons.

She let her emotions dictate a serious d**k move and now she's saying whatever she can to justify her behavior. Complete narcissistic behavior. Dad - like wtf, you're his kid and he's letting someone treat you this way, especially when he was the catalyst to the entire situation.

ArchdukeToes − NTA. Your Dad is a spineless snake who would rather passively let you be tossed out on the street then stand up to your Mum, and your Mum is just awful. Personally, I wouldn’t have accepted his ‘apology’. He needs to recognise that letting your Mum be awful to you is the same as him being awful to you. He doesn’t get a pass just ‘cause he sat there and did nothing.

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SlinkyMalinky20 − Disengage with both of your parents. Your dad doesn’t deserve to assuage his guilt over being a terrible parent and your mom is hopeless.

ViewedFromi3WM − Happened to me dude. Was homeless for about a year or 2. Hard to remember the exact timeline. time is hard to keep when homeless.

jess1804 − Dad caused the original problem (crashing OP'S car) he didn't step in because he didn't want to upset mom anymore? Dad crashed the car and caused the damage he should pay for it. Note how Mom isn't angry at dad. Angry at OP.

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WanderingGnostic − Still NTA and talking to them seems to make it worse. Don't. You know where they stand. Going over it again and again will not help. It's going to suck, but don't go back. Keep pushing forward and stay away from your sperm and egg donor. And since your brother is only adding to the pain and not helping, you may need to go LC with him, too.

chrisrevere2 − Your mom needs to see the inside of a psychiatrist’s office. You don’t have to have a relationship with her anymore.

Careless-Image-885 − NTA. I call BS on what your father's 'apology'. He didn't shut it down. He let your mother do whatever she wanted.. Saying that he didn't want to upset her is a crock of 💩!!!!!

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These voices stoke the conversation, but do they light a path forward, or just fuel the fire of hurt?

This update lays bare a family crumbling under the weight of blame and cruel words. The son’s struggle to process his mother’s rejection and his father’s weak apology reveals the raw cost of parental betrayal. Can he find answers or peace, or is distance his only refuge? What would you do when family cuts you deeper than you thought possible? Drop your thoughts below and let’s unravel this heartache together!

For those who want to read the sequel: [UPDATE 2] AITAH My parents kicked me out without warning.
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