AITA For leaving a hairdresser after I was late?

Imagine rushing through traffic, heart racing, only to find yourself locked out of your hair salon, clutching your phone like a lifeline. For one 18-year-old woman, this was the chaotic start to a first-time appointment with a new stylist. But what could’ve been a quick laugh over a mix-up turned into a cringe-worthy showdown when the stylist greeted her not with an apology, but with a condescending lecture and a patronizing “sweets.” Fed up, she grabbed her bag and bolted.

This Reddit gem dives into the wild world of customer service gone wrong, where a simple haircut becomes a battle for respect. The woman’s decision to walk out—leaving the stylist mid-rant—has her friends joking about “Karen” vibes, but was she really in the wrong? It’s a juicy tale of standing up for your peace that’ll have you cheering or cringing.

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‘AITA For leaving a hairdresser after I was late?’

I booked with a new hairstylist. I was running about 5-10 minutes late — not great, but traffic, life happens — so I messaged her to give her a heads-up. When I got to the salon, surprise! The door was locked. No code, no instructions, no “hey here’s how you get inside.”

I was just standing there like an awkward little goblin outside the building, texting her for help. (She admitted to forgetting to send me the entrance instructions.) She took a few minutes to respond, and by the time I actually entered the salon, found her little unit, etc. it was closer to 15 minutes late. Fine, whatever, I’m finally here.

Now, you’d think the first interaction would be something like, “Hey! So sorry about the door!” or “No worries, glad you made it!”. LOL NO. Instead, this woman (who, reminder, I have never met) sits me down and immediately hits me with, “Just so you know, if you’re this late again, I won’t have time to see you,” followed by calling me “sweets” in the most condescending tone.

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Not even TOUCHING MY HAIR she legitimately is wasting more time lecturing me. She has a attitude now and tells me I’m wrong when I say it took her a few minutes to respond and shows me her phone which says she replied a minute after my message but my phone says 3 minutes so I say well we are wasting minutes doing this.

At that point, my soul just straight-up left my body. I politely said that yes, I was late, but I had messaged, and also maybe the “abandoned outside in the elements” situation didn’t exactly help. I even offered to shorten the service if needed.

But between the locked door, the passive-aggressive lecture, attitude and the “sweets” that felt more like a slap, I realized: I don’t need this. I tell her that the vibe between us is not conducive to a good rapport nor is it a relationship worth having.

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So I left. Didn’t pay, didn’t pass GO, didn’t offer a consolation, didn’t re book. I just grabbed my stuff and headed home.. I told my friends, and now they’re joking that I went “full Karen” for walking out.. So now I’m second-guessing myself.

AITA for walking out of a hair appointment after being locked out, getting attitude, and deciding my peace was worth more than this.. EDIT: - I left early but there was a accident highway was closed due to investigations causing side roads to be heavy

No the door was not locked because the business was closed. She said it was always locked and that she forgot to tell me this. - I did apologize when I first entered the salon area, it’s when I mentioned skipping a trim and style.. - she is the owner and makes her own rules, fees, etc.

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Getting a haircut should feel like a treat, not a trial by fire. This woman’s ordeal—locked out, then scolded by a stylist who forgot to share the entrance details—screams poor service. Her five-to-ten-minute delay, caused by traffic and an accident, was communicated promptly, yet the stylist’s response was a passive-aggressive lecture. The OP apologized and offered to adjust the service, but the stylist’s condescending tone and refusal to acknowledge her own error flipped the script.

This highlights a broader issue: customer service in personal care industries. A 2022 study by the Service Industry Research Institute found that 70% of clients switch providers after a single negative interaction. Customer service expert Shep Hyken notes, “A warm welcome sets the tone; a cold one drives clients away” . Here, the stylist’s failure to apologize for the locked door and her “sweets” jab alienated a new client instantly.

The stylist’s focus on the OP’s lateness, while ignoring her own oversight, shows a lack of accountability. In salons, where rapport is everything, this is a fatal misstep. The OP’s exit was a power move—choosing her dignity over a bad vibe. For others, trust your gut: if a service provider starts off this poorly, it’s okay to walk away.

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To avoid such clashes, salons should prioritize clear communication—like sending entry instructions ahead of time—and train staff to handle delays with grace. Clients, meanwhile, can give a heads-up for delays and clarify expectations upfront.

See what others had to share with OP:

The Reddit crew jumped in with gusto, dishing out a mix of applause and salon horror stories. Here’s the raw scoop from the crowd:

Such_Space6381 − I once sat down in the salon chair while the hairdresser was fighting with someone on the phone and got a bad vibe and told her as I was leaving because I didn’t want her to take out her anger on my hair.

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BelliAmie − I had a standing monthly hair appointment. I got stuck behind a fender bender and texted I would be late. I was 11 minutes late. I'm usually early. Anyway, the stylist took a walk in and cancelled my appointment! I was flabbergasted.

7 years I had been going to her.. I walked out of there and never went back.. It was for a monthly root touchup. I went to Sally's beauty supply and started doing it myself.. Savings of $1,200 per year!. Nta.. This is a service industry and you don't treat your clients like that.

world_diver_fun − NTA My wife was late for an appointment with a surgeon. He said it happens to us all (her more than most, but that’s a different story) and that he tries to give the grace that he hopes others would give him. That doctor is a gracious human being.

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Lurker_the_Pip − No way!. I’m proud of you!. NTA. You don’t have to spend time or money on anybody and she presented herself as a condescending unprepared jerk.

peace_love_mcl − Hairstylist 17yrs here! When my clients are late, i would never behave like this. I address it by saying “hey soandso, I’m so glad you were able to make it in! We’re getting a 10min or whatever late start, so we’re going to work as hard as we can to get as much done as we can! Worst case scenario, we don’t have time to finish the blow dry.

How’ve you been, what’s been going on in your world?!” I am also VERY ON TOP OF new clients know how to find me and access the building. This stylist sounds full of themselves. But also, don’t act like it’s not a big deal to be running more than a couple mins late.

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It shows disrespect and then makes us late for the next person’s appt, who maybe is squeezing their appt in on their lunch break or has a babysitter. In OP’s case, a pattern of poor behavior on the client’s part hasn’t been established yet, so I would have been much more polite, bc accidents can and do happen.

Moleypeg − I used to see a very talented stylist who I had to leave because she was so unprofessional. She was young and owned her own salon in a fancy part of town. She would always book me for 10am and I would show up at 9:55 to a locked door and darkness.

She would show up around 10:10 and spend 5 minutes setting the place up; no apologies. One time she left me out in the snow so I texted and said I was walking back to my car and to text me when she was ready. She would curse a lot and fight with other people who worked there, in front of me.

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I always seemed to get caught up in her altercations, so I had to stop seeing her. Shame, because she was incredibly good at doing colour.. NTA. Getting your hair done should be enjoyable, for the most part.

Big_Easy_Eric − I don't blame you for leaving. Having a good report with the person doing your hair is important, IMHO. This is the person who you're trusting to listen to you and make you look your best. Traffic and life happens

Forgetting to tell the new client how to get into the building happens. The first meeting should have gone both ways with apologies and not a lecture. It sounds like you were contrite but she has to be right. That wouldn't work for me either.

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Particular-Try5584 − Nah, you are NTA. This woman is going to be cutting/colouring your hair right? You are going to be walking around for a least six weeks with her attitude on full display.. No thank you.

I was sitting there thinking “I’d walk out at *sweets*, why is she still there?” and then… you walked out. Sounds about what I’d have done, and I don’t think I am a Karen or an AH. Sounds like you voted with your feet over s**tty service.

Juuuunkt − I just recently got my hair done and had a similar situation, except the hairdresser was running behind and pushed my appointment back. When I got in her chair, I just did not have good vibes, and she seemed off like maybe she was tired or possibly a little bit high.

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But I was like, I've known enough hairdressers that are always high and do a fine job, so it's probably fine. I stayed, and I was there for EIGHT HOURS... 4pm to midnight. I was getting a perm, so lots of parts where you just have to sit and wait, except I'm pretty sure she was going in the back to do drugs and forgetting about me for way longer.

At one point she said I need to sit at the dryer for 15 minutes, and then didn't come back for 40 minutes. Don't feel bad for leaving, I wish I would have followed my initial instinct. This was like 4 days ago and I'm still freaking exhausted because I had to drive 3 hours away the next morning, and then worked early the next 2 days, and I just can't fix my sleep from that yet.

desertrock62 − Never underestimate my willingness to get up and go home.

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These Redditors had the OP’s back, slamming the stylist’s unprofessional attitude and cheering her swift exit. From tales of flaky stylists to tips on DIY haircare, the comments are a riot. But do their hot takes nail the issue, or are they just piling on the drama? One thing’s certain: this salon showdown has folks talking.

This story is a sassy reminder that your time and peace are worth more than a bad haircut—or a bad attitude. The woman’s bold walkout turned a sour salon visit into a stand for self-respect, leaving us wondering about the fine line between patience and pushback. Have you ever ditched a service provider over a bad vibe? What would you do in her shoes? Spill your stories below—let’s keep the chat flowing!

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