My (34M) wife (33F) cheated and is now pregnant.

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Picture a cozy family home, filled with laughter from two young boys and the warmth of a high school sweetheart romance. Now imagine that world shattering when a husband learns his wife, Anna, betrayed him. At 34, he’s staring down a painful truth: her infidelity and a new pregnancy that might not be his.

This Reddit story grips the heart, as years of love clash with hurt and doubt. Anna’s tears and apologies can’t erase the sting, and with their families begging him to stay, he’s torn. Is forgiveness possible, or is this the end of their story?

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‘My (34M) wife (33F) cheated and is now pregnant.’

Long story short, my (34m) wife Anna (33f) cheated on me. I don't know why. She says she doesn't know why either. Anytime I ask anything, it's just a river of tears. She says sorry and begs me to forgive her and forget it but I can't. But leaving hasn't been easy either. We have 2 boys together. She's my high school sweetheart. Our families are longtime friends and are still tight with each other.

They've all urged me to stay for the kids. To forgive her since it was 'one time'. To not give up all the good because of one bad.. But the worst part is she's pregnant. I found out about the pregnancy from my mother as I had her blocked and wasn't living in the same house anymore. I demanded a paternity test.

he readily agreed and swore she'd get rid of the child if it's not mine. She's had nothing but curse words for her affair partner. But then, all she's done since getting caught (didn't confess) is curse the guy and herself and cry.. She's threatened to end herself. All she does is hug the boys and cry.

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I'm waiting on the results. I'll divorce her anyway but she says the baby is for sure mine. That she slept with him once whereas we'd been intimate pretty much every night the duration of her affair. It lasted 2 months I think. They met, talked and slept only once if I'm to believe her.

I don't know why, but the idea of the child being mine disgusts me. It feels like she couldn't commit to anything. Not to me nor the other guy. Why was she cheating if I was satisfying her? How is it that she wanted to talk about her feelings with some random man but not me? How was she sharing her deepest thoughts and feelings with this guy and being with me at once? How does that even work?

I've always thought cheating was because you werent being fulfilled by your partner at home. I've read all these stories of wives leaving their kids, denying affections to their husbands, making jokes at the husband's expense, ruining the men financially etc. She's done nothing of that sort.

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She's still the best mother I could have hoped for my sons. They love her more than they love me I know. She was still the same loving and giving woman I fell for while she was being with the other guy. I saw her texts (the ones she hadn't deleted) and every other text is 'I love my husband'.

I don't understand. I can't make heads or tails of this situation. If I did give her a baby, am I expected to forget and move back in? What if I can't do that? It's easy hating the child now because that might be her AP's. But what if its mine and I still hate it? I genuinely don't know how to be without her. Our entire lives are interwoven.

Some days I want to go back to the blissful ignorance I was living in.. The DNA report takes a week I believe. It's been 3 days. My sister (she visits Anna regularly. I'm angry about that too because she's only visited me twice.) says my wife just looks at our wedding photos and cries. We have a whole junkyard collection worth of pictures and memories.

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She begged me to go see her once. I am clueless of how to proceed. It would've been so much easier if she had been a horrible woman for those 2 months that I could begin to look back and hate. But I cant. Life had been as normal and sweet as ever. I don't even have a bad memory of her I can use to hate her. Our last big fight before this, I can't even remember.

I'm going to see her and my boys tomorrow. I think I'll ask for DNA tests on them too. I know they're mine. But you never know. Maybe I'll do it just to hurt her. Maybe I'll find something and I'll just hurt myself more. But that feels so unfair to the boys.. Just how do I make sense of this?

Edit: I called her. She was crying again but agreed to meet with me. I told her I was going with divorce one way or another. But whether we can ever reconcile a few years later or not fully depends on her honesty. She was crying and her voice sounded rough. But after a while she said she will tell me everything. (So she does know why she did it?) But for some reason, she asked me to bring my sister along.

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My sister hasn't said anything either. I'm only praying my sister doesn't turn out to be an accomplice or something. She didn't beg for forgiveness or say 'think about our kids' after I told her how manipulative she's sounding. She seemed genuinely shocked to realize how she was holding me hostage with her threats. Does that mean something deeper? Are they actions of someone who has remorse?

Edit: I talked to her. She showed me all the evidence and I found out which the man was. I am certain now that she was infact assaulted. However Anna doesn't seem to think so.. She says she didn't fight back and had 'goaded' him which made him attack her.

I cannot update because reddit is being strange. I have decided to put everything on hold for now. And just take her counseling. Nothing else until I get the paternity results on the baby.. Thank you so much for all the advice.

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The OP’s dropped an update on the saga—curious? Click here to check it out!

This tale cuts deep, showing how infidelity can unravel even the tightest bonds. Anna’s affair, though brief, blindsided her husband, who thought their marriage was rock-solid. Dr. Esther Perel, a noted relationship therapist, observes, “Infidelity doesn’t always reflect a lack in the relationship but a search for another version of oneself.” Anna’s actions may stem from personal unrest, not her husband’s failings.

Her remorse seems genuine, but his trust is shattered, especially since she didn’t confess. Long-term couples like them often face this when one partner craves novelty, per a 2022 study showing 20% of married adults experience affairs by midlife.

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The pregnancy adds urgency. If the child is his, he might feel trapped; if not, it could cement his exit. Perel suggests open dialogue to rebuild trust, starting with Anna explaining her motives honestly.

He should seek therapy to process his pain and decide if reconciliation is viable.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Reddit’s got no chill, serving up raw reactions to Anna’s betrayal and the husband’s heartbreak. Here’s the community’s take, with some spicy opinions.

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undercovertortoise − Edit/UPDATE: OPs updates were posted after my reply- his wife was SAd and that changes everything, he was NOT cheated on. I hope no one equates rape/s**ual a**ault to something even close to cheating either and I hope she gets the support she needs.

Someone said I should delete my comment but I don't see a reason to bury what I had said, since it is one of the top comments I'm leaving it up so someone can see the update too.. Don't ever stay for the kids- it's such an abused concept in my culture and every person I grew up with that had 'both' their parents grew up fucked up

and are still working through those issues- including myself. You will find yourself taking out frustration on the wrong people- most likely the kids. Find a way to divorce her and do right by your boys. They deserve all the love and whatever that takes- take those actions.

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professionaldrama- − “ Why was she cheating if I was satisfying her?” Because her cheating has nothing to do with you. She was trying to fill a gap in her; it’s not your fault. She needs therapy desperately. She needs to stop cursing her affair partner

and start taking the responsibility of her affair.. You need therapy as well.. “ I've always thought cheating was because you werent being fulfilled by your partner at home.”. That’s not true and I’m sorry you found out what a bullsh’t thought this is this way.

IngenuityofLife − Bro, she didn't even confess. What would've happened if she didn't get caught? How long would it continue? Would she still be cursing the guy if she didn't get caught? Or will she try to find another affair partner? Leave her mate. There has to be some repercussions to her actions. Would it be fair if she gets to cheat and still live with you, while you're hurting over there?

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[Reddit User] − To be honest, my advice is divorce.. How can you mend relationships that are completely broken? Of course, your wife cries and scolds her lover - after all, she was caught cheating, and she didn’t admit it herself. So she didn't regret cheating, she only regrets because she was caught, otherwise she would have continued to cheat on you.

Be sure to ask for a DNA test for your children, because if she has been unfaithful to you now, she may have been unfaithful in the past too. Staying in a marriage just for the sake of children, when the very essence of marriage is broken and there is no more trust, is not a solution.

Because children see and understand everything and will learn in the future to live with the same vision that it is normal when wives cheat, and husbands need to reconcile for the sake of the children and move on with their lives, and this is fundamentally wrong. Even after the divorce, you will still be their father and can take care of them, but in a healthy relationship

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[Reddit User] − I see a pattern when it comes to women and men that have been together since high school. They want to find out what s** with another person is like somehow? But.. really sad for you. I hope you can find peace and maybe you can forgive her in the future.

MoomahTheQueen − Get some therapy my friend. You need someone to talk all of this out with

Unfair_Explanation53 − If you want the actual reason for why she cheated, not that it justifies it. It's most likely because you were high school sweethearts and she's not been with many other people rather than you. Her impulses got the better of her and she ruined things.

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Sometimes it's something as simple as this unfortunately, I don't doubt you are a great husband and human and you don't deserve what happened. If I was in your shoes, I couldn't carry on. Once the purity of a relationship is broken by physical or mentally cheating then I couldn't continue.

Bargle-Nawdle-Zouss − Contact a divorce lawyer, and reach out to schedule an appointment with a licensed marriage and family therapist, immediately. Do get paternity tests on your other children as well. You are not going to find out why she cheated on you, certainly not right now.

All you can do is what you can control, which is take the steps toward separating your lives and arranging things for your children. You can be fair, but you must be firm. Do not let tears dissuade you from proceeding. You cannot live with her any longer, there is no way you will forget how she betrayed you. Do not delay, take action tomorrow morning.

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idk_sideaccount − LEAVE. If she's afraid she's pregnant of this dude it means they had raw s**. Do you have any idea of how much danger of STDs she put you in? That's so disgusting

lynxblaine − I guess my small add to this is why is it all about her tears? What about your pain when you ask what’s happened. She owes you a real explanation and right now she’s taken no responsibility and blames others for her own choice.

These comments are bold, but do they see the whole picture? Is Anna redeemable, or is the marriage done?

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This husband’s world flipped upside down, and now he’s juggling love, betrayal, and a potential new child. Anna’s mistake doesn’t erase their history, but can it be overcome? What would you do if faced with this kind of heartbreak? Share your thoughts and experiences below—let’s dive into the debate!

For those who want to read the sequel: [UPDATE] My (34m) wife (33f) cheated and is now pregnant.
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