I (29f) Didn’t Miss My Husband (30m)?

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In a quiet house, with kids tucked in and bubbles swirling in her bath, a 29-year-old woman sank into an unfamiliar stillness. Her husband was away for the weekend, but unlike the past, when she’d count the minutes until his return, she felt… nothing.

No ache, no excitement—just a strange, peaceful indifference. Her online confession sparked a chorus of advice, from calling it a healthy shift to urging a deeper look at her marriage.

‘I (29f) Didn’t Miss My Husband (30m)?’

My husband was gone for the weekend on a short trip. He left early Friday morning and got back early Sunday evening. It was just me and our kids at home. Last night, after I’d gotten them to bed and was soaking in a bath, I realized I hadn’t missed him at all.

In the past, when he’d be gone with late hours at work or weekends at drill (he used to be an army reservist) I’d miss him so much, counting the seconds until he got home, and I’d be so excited when he walked through the door. This time, I felt nothing.

I’m not sure how to feel about this. I know it was just a weekend, but that has never mattered before. We hardly talked this weekend, and I honestly don’t really care or even notice. Is this indicative of anything? Should I take a deeper look at our relationship? Any advice is appreciated.

This woman’s weekend of calm, free from missing her husband, unveils a subtle but common evolution in long-term relationships. Her past clinginess during his absences contrasts with this newfound ease, hinting at either personal growth or underlying tensions, especially given her mention of past conflicts, like his harsh communication or lingering feelings for an ex.

Relationship therapist Esther Perel observes, “The quality of our relationships lies in balancing intimacy with independence”. Here, the woman’s comfort alone could signal a healthy step toward self-reliance, but her indifference might also reflect unresolved issues, as some Redditors noted her history of feeling belittled.

This taps a broader trend: evolving dynamics in marriage. A 2021 study by the Institute for Family Studies found 38% of married couples report needing more personal space over time. Her enjoyment of solo time is normal, but context matters—if disrespect or unresolved pain lingers, it could dull her emotional connection.

She should reflect on whether this feeling persists and discuss it openly with her husband, perhaps seeking couples counseling to address communication or past hurts.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Reddit dished out a mix of reassurance and gentle nudges, with a sprinkle of humor for good measure. From celebrating solo time to suggesting a deeper dive into her marriage, the takes were spicy and varied.

[Reddit User] − I, too, used to miss my husband when he traveled for work or pulled long hours. Now, its nice to have the bed to myself. To have an evening that is all mine. Honestly? Its the sign of a mature marriage - you are comfortable in your relationship and can enjoy your time alone secure in the knowledge he will be back. Its a normal part of a healthy marriage. Just roll with it. If you start feeling ambivalence towards him as a human being then that is a different issue.

ESJ-in-PA − It’s only indicative that you needed and enjoyed your alone time. There’s nothing wrong with that!

Aussiebiblophile − I’ve been married 20 years. I treat his trips away like mini holidays for myself. Sometimes I miss him. Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes we talk or message daily, sometimes we don’t after the initial I’m here safely and I’ll be home at whatever time. But think it’s a sign of a healthy marriage because you don’t want to be codependent.

nick4424 − You knew he was coming back. If he wasn’t coming back, it would be a different story

babygoblin8993 − You just needed some serious alone time. Nothing wrong with that!

onedayatatime08 − In general I would have said no, but I did see in your post history that you've had some issues. I'm not sure if he worked on how he talks to you, but I don't think I'd miss someone who keeps behaving like I'm stupid. I know you also had mentioned a comment your husband made about always loving his ex wife. Has that still been on your mind as well?

It could just be that you got some very needed alone time. If the above issues are still a problem, though, maybe this is something you need to address with him to actually get a solution. Example.. he gets help to learn how to communicate in a kind way, you get help to see if you can move past the ex wife thing?

Awkward-Adeptness-75 − Absolutely nothing wrong with that, sometimes we just need alone time. I love my husband, but I also look forward to the time I get to spend alone. It doesn’t mean that I love him any less.

GreatResearcher5596 − Sometimes we just need space in our relationships. Having children and balancing a healthy relationship with a spouse is exhausting. Enjoying some time to yourself is healthy. Sometimes I just need an empty house to catch my breath

ccl-now − It indicates that your relationship has moved from the giddy, excitement filled romance era into a more settled, sustainable phase.

marathonmindset − Don’t overthink it. Sometimes we just need to be alone.

These online gems spark debate, but do they nail the real-world vibe? One thing’s sure: everyone’s got an opinion on love and space.

This woman’s quiet weekend alone, free from missing her husband, shines a light on the ebb and flow of marriage—where independence can feel like freedom or a warning sign. Whether it’s a sign of strength or a nudge to dig deeper, her story resonates. Have you ever savored time apart from your partner, only to question why? Drop your experiences below—let’s keep this chat rolling!

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