Am I wrong for leaving a date without telling him?

Navigating the wild world of online dating can feel like a treasure hunt, but one Redditor’s quest for connection took a sharp turn into deception central. At 24, she thought she’d hit it off with a guy who shared her interests—until she met him at a bar and discovered he wasn’t 28, as claimed, but a whopping 42, with outdated photos to boot. His casual “age is just a number” line didn’t quite cut it.

Feeling the “ick,” she made a quick exit, but now her friend’s calling her out for ghosting mid-date. Readers can sense her unease, wondering if she was too harsh or justifiably dodged a red flag. Let’s sip on this juicy tale of catfishing, trust, and split-second decisions.

‘Am I wrong for leaving a date without telling him?’

First dates are nerve-wracking enough without a bait-and-switch on age. This Redditor’s swift exit highlights a clash between honesty and deception in online dating. The guy’s 14-year age lie wasn’t just a fib—it was a deliberate mask, paired with outdated photos to lure a younger match. Her “ick” reaction wasn’t just about the age gap; it was the betrayal of trust from the get-go. His defensive “you’re shallow” retort only dug the hole deeper.

Online dating deception is rampant. A 2023 study from Pew Research found 30% of dating app users have encountered profiles with false information, like age or appearance. This guy’s tactic—hiding his age to seem more “appealing”—reflects a broader issue of authenticity in digital romance.

Dating coach Dr. Christie Hartman, author of Changing Your Game, notes, “Honesty is the foundation of any connection. Misrepresenting yourself sets up a relationship for failure”. Here, the man’s lie undermined any chance of genuine rapport, justifying OP’s retreat. Hartman would likely applaud her for trusting her gut.

For others in this spot, experts suggest verifying details pre-date (like video chats) and setting firm boundaries. OP’s choice to leave was a power move, but a quick “I’m not comfortable, bye” might’ve softened the blow. What’s your take on handling dating dealbreakers?

See what others had to share with OP:

Reddit’s crew brought the heat, serving up a mix of cheers and shade for OP’s bold move. Here’s what the community had to say about this dating debacle:

These hot takes are fiery, but do they miss the nuance of navigating safety and politeness? Maybe the truth is in trusting your instincts—red flags and all!

This dating disaster leaves us pondering: when does a white lie become a dealbreaker? OP’s quick getaway spared her a night of awkwardness, but was it too cold? Or was she right to bolt from a liar? Share your thoughts below: What would you do if your date pulled a catfish move? How do you handle trust in online dating?